Code of Honor
by Anthro06
Summary: Complete! The team must each in their own way face some of their deepest fears when Ba’al threatens to unleash a fearsome weapon on Earth. Jack and Sam may finally find a way to be together, but will it be too late for either of them to find true happines
1. Chapter One

CODE OF HONOR

BY

Jen Gafeller

**Email:** Angst; Sam/Jack UST/Romance; Hurt/Comfort; Action/Adventure

**Content Warnings:** Sam/Jack UST/Romance; some language; Violence in the form of a short torture scene involving one of the main characters. If that sort of thing makes you uncomfortable, you might want to give this story a miss.

**Season/Sequel:** Season 8 – pre Threads

**Spoilers:** Pretty much anything that comes before Threads is open game in this one.

**Summary:** The team must each in their own way face some of their deepest fears when Ba'al threatens to unleash a fearsome weapon on Earth.

**Status:** WIP

**Disclaimer:** Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime / Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money changed hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. Not to be archived without permission. Feedback and constructive criticism welcome through e-mailing me at the above address. I'm poor and don't have much but my muse, so please don't sue me. )

**Copyright: © **2005 Jen Gafeller

**Author's Notes: **I got a flash one one scene in this story and this is what came of it.This is by far my most ambitious undertaking to date. This beast is already nearly 100 pages and I'm not even to the climax of the story yet. I'll post here, but not with any regularity. But eventually I will finish this story. It's been plucking at my brain for too long not to finish it. Heck I've actually been writing the darn thing for close to 8 months now. Finishing it is sort of a pride thing now. And to my wonderful beta, Renate. Couldn't have done this without you, m'dear! You're the best!

**Dedication:** To my daughter, who left this world long before she deserved. You are my inspiration and my guardian angel, my Cora Beth.

**Chapter One**

Standing tall and forbidding in its perfect symmetry, the Stargate rolled through the symbols, each a step along the pathway to another world. Some hostile and barren, some rich and fertile with raw materials for the taking. Raw materials to be used in the construction of ships and weapons; raw materials to be used as hosts for the Goa'uld. The Goa'uld who had moved across the galaxy like a fire, sweeping all others away with a flick of their power. The creatures who had the power to control much of the inhabited galaxy, and yet could not survive without the humans they took as hosts; the humans they controlled from within their own bodies.

For many decades upon decades he had traveled through the Chappa'ai; used it to further his own twisted plans of conquest. Never had he doubted its power or his destiny in ruling over that power. He was among the Goa'uld System Lords who ruled the galaxy with iron fists; fighting amongst themselves as easily as amongst their non-Goa'uld enemies. The System Lords, through their guile and cunning, ruled over the galaxy for centuries, their technology stolen from those they conquered. Their advancements came at the price of those who fell to their armies of Jaffa foot soldiers. But now one System Lord was poised to rule over them all.

Ba'al. The System Lord who had dared to conquer all. The System Lord who dared to bring all other System Lords under his boot. Until now, his plans for conquest had gone unrealized. Until now, he had no means by which to subjugate the others; no means to bring them into line and pledge themselves to serve him and only him. But with his discovery all of that had changed. The best minds amongst his followers now worked to bring it to life. It was a weapon, of that he was sure, but what kind of weapon? Would it be as powerful as he had hoped?

They assured him they had unlocked its secrets, but they had to be sure. They needed to test this weapon before relying on it for their survival in battle. But time was short. The other System Lords had been fighting amongst themselves for so long, they had allowed their vigilance to falter. They allowed the Tok'ra to gain the upper hand once too often, and now that the Tok'ra had allied themselves with the Tau'ri people of Earth, they were even more formidable. Many had fallen before any among them had truly realized the threat: Ra, Hathor, Apophis, Sokar. System Lords who had once been thought to be invincible, now as dead as those who had once worshipped them as gods.

Those deaths had left a void in the power base of the System Lords. A void that Ba'al vowed to fill. While the others bickered and fought, he had built an army of soldiers more powerful than the strongest Jaffa army. All his army needed now was one swift, powerful strike to pave the way into their strongholds. This weapon promised to give them that tool, a way to neutralize the Jaffa armies of the other System Lords and leave their worlds ripe for the taking. However, they would only be distracted by their infighting for so long before they realized their blunder and turned their attention to him.

The test of this new weapon was poised, awaiting his order. Within hours he would know if his patience would be rewarded; he would know if his conquest of the Goa'uld System Lords could finally begin.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Brigadier General Jonathan "Jack" O'Neill sat at his desk skimming through the small mountain of memos and reports that awaited his attention. He had known going into this job that the administration would be the bane of his existence, but he hadn't truly comprehended the sheer magnitude of the job. General Hammond had once commented that if someone sneezed around the Stargate a report was generated, and in that he had not been exaggerating. Now all of those reports unerringly found their way to Jack's desk.

Jack had begun to develop an appreciation for the reports with short and sweet bullet points that succinctly summarized things for him. He closed the cover on one such report, written by his former second in command Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter, and rubbed his eyes wearily. He could always count on Carter to make his administrative life easier, and he certainly did appreciate it. Not that her reports weren't thorough, she just knew him well enough to summarize the "techno babble" down to a few short phrases that actually made sense.

Taking a deep breath and deciding to change gears from mission reports to memos, Jack reached for the stack recently delivered from the Pentagon and opened the top folder. In his fatigue, he barely registered what he was reading until one name reached out from the page to grab his attention. Jack straightened up in his chair, turning his full attention back to the beginning of the memo.

TO:Brig. General Jonathan O'Neill

Commanding Officer, Stargate Command

FROM:Lt. General Roger Brady

USAF Chief of Personnel

RE:Re Assignment, Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter

24 September 2004

This is to request the formal reassignment of Lt. Col. S. Carter to the research facility at Area 51. The USAF Chief of Personnel has tentatively approved this request, made by the Commanding Officer of Research and Development at Area 51, Brig. General R. Greene.

Lt. Colonel Carter is to be given command of all research and development activities associated with retrieval of artifacts and alien technologies acquired through Stargate Command.

If approved reassignment would be effective ASAP. Please review the attached proposal and respond no later than 6 October 2004.

The memo was signed by the Chief of Personnel and counter signed by General Greene from Area 51. Jack knew that Area 51 had been after Carter and her expertise for years, but this was the first time he had been in a position to either approve or deny a request to have her reassigned to that facility permanently. Jack pushed his chair back from his desk and ran his hands through his short hair, sighing deeply. This was a big step up for Carter, and one that she'd be foolish not to accept. What the hell would he do if she actually said yes?

On the other hand, did she even want to go? Honestly, Jack could see Carter being very happy getting to play with doohickeys and computers in the labs at Area 51. Since they were technically "off the books", and had been around a lot longer than the SGC, Area 51 was at the front lines for all cutting edge technology at the Air Force's disposal. Something he knew would appeal to the scientist in Carter. But since taking over as SG-1's CO, he had seen a new side to Sam Carter emerging; a side of her he had rarely seen outside her lab.

Carter had become more self assured in the field and among her purely military colleagues and SG-1 had barely missed a step since his promotion and departure from the team. Jack had been both relieved and a bit unnerved that she had replaced him on the team so easily. Not that he had wanted her to fail, by any stretch of the imagination, but still it was good to be needed and SG-1 didn't seem to need him at all.

And that would add to his already growing number of headaches; if Carter did decide to take up the offer and leave for Area 51, who in the hell would he get to command SG-1? There was no way he was going to dodge a decision about the flagship team if they were left with only 2 team members. The thought gave him pause, and for a fleeting instant he allowed himself to consider life at the SGC without Sam Carter before roughly pushing that thought, and its associated emotions and feelings, aside.

_Get a grip, O'Neill. Carter'll never leave the SGC. She loves it here just as much, or more, than anyone else in this command._ But as much as he tried to reassure himself, down deep he couldn't truly be certain of anything. It's not like he had ever really discussed her future with her, so for all he knew this was the dream job Carter had been waiting for the last 7 years.

Jack glanced at the last paragraph again then to the calendar on his desk. 30 September 2004 was displayed prominently right on top. _Crap!_ The Chief needed his answer by next week, and that left Carter with little time to make her decision. One of these days he was really going to have to get better at time management.

Shaking his head, Jack rose from his chair, the memos and reports now forgotten as he made his way out into the corridor his feet taking him automatically toward the elevators and Carter's lab. It was well after 1700, but lately he had noticed Sam working in her lab later and later into the evenings. He had been meaning to ask her about it, but simply hadn't found the time for idle chat with any of SG-1. He slowed to a stop, just outside her lab doorway, allowing himself a moment of guilty pleasure at just watching her work.

Sam was in a word, beautiful. He had thought so nearly from the first moment he met her, and certainly from the moment she challenged him to arm wrestle. Jack smiled slightly to himself at the memory of young Captain Samantha Carter, her eyes blazing in fiery determination. So much had changed about her in the ensuing years, and yet even now if he looked deep enough he could still see that young Captain who had the guts enough to go head to head with him across a briefing table but who could also stand wide eyed at the base of the Stargate and marvel at its existence. He watched for a moment as she bent forward toward her laptop, her brow furrowing in concentration at whatever was scrolling across her screen.

As he watched, Sam's expression cleared to one of discovery and she suddenly began typing furiously, her fingers flying faster than he could follow. As a small smile spread slowly across her face, Jack found himself smiling in response, her obvious joy at figuring out whatever she was working on infecting him as well. He indulged for only a moment longer before he stepped the rest of the way into the doorframe and cleared this throat slightly, catching the Colonel's attention.

"Sir, I'm sorry, I didn't see you there."

"Not a problem Colonel, you were apparently busy," Jack replied, waving his hand in the general direction of her desk and laptop.

"Yes, sir. I was actually working on the anti-grav generator SG-6 discovered on P5Y-326 during their last mission. You see, initially I presumed it worked using a subspace field, not unlike our hyperdrive engines, but that wasn't working, so I started experimenting with the ratio of…"  
"Carter!"

"Yes, sir, sorry," Sam replied somewhat sheepishly, her excitement at figuring out this particular puzzle still shining brightly in her eyes. Jack would've been blind to miss it.

"So, you figured it out, yes?"

"Yes, sir! If I'm right and these simulations pan out, we could be looking at a technology that could revolutionize our X-302 and X-303 projects."

"Great, Carter. Keep me apprised."

"I will, sir," Sam replied and began to turn back to her laptop, but not before she got a quick look at Jack's face and was surprised to see an expression that she had come to equate with Jack feeling uncomfortable about something, his eyes crinkling slightly at the corners; his lips pursed into a hard, thin line; his eyes wandering restlessly over her lab, not settling in any one place for long.

"Was there something else you wanted to see me about, sir?"

Now that look had blossomed into all out panic and Sam found she was suddenly sorry she asked. Whatever it was, the General wasn't happy about it.

"Ah, actually Carter, I got a memo today."

Sam waited expectantly for several seconds, but when Jack seemed unwilling to elaborate she pushed ahead. "Yes, sir. I would imagine you get quite a few memos everyday."

"Yeah. More than I ever thought possible. I don't know how old George ever put up with all of it, to be honest with you."

Sam smiled at the sentiment. "No, sir."

The silence stretched again, and Sam was beginning to become a bit nervous.

"Sir?"

"Huh?"

"The memo?"

"Oh, yeah. That," Jack sighed, shoving his hands deeply into his pockets before continuing. "It was from the Pentagon. Chief of Personnel to be exact. They want me to sign off on a reassignment."

Sam could tell from Jack's demeanor the last thing he wanted to do was approved the request, but she still wasn't sure why he was bringing it to her. "Ah, I see. So, what're you going to do?"

"See that's just it, I don't know," Jack said exasperatedly, waving his hand in the air for emphasis. "I mean, it's a good career move and all, but…"

"Sir, who are we talking about, anyway?"

"Oh, right. Um…you actually."

"Me, sir? The Chief of Personnel sent a memo about me?"

"Yeah, actually. Wants you reassigned to Area 51. Commanding Officer of Research and Development."

"Not again," Sam sighed.

Jack didn't seem to notice her reply and barreled ahead. "It would be a big step up for you, Carter. Pretty much guarantee you'd make full bird in the minimum time allowed….wait, again? What'd you mean "again"?"

"Sir, General Greene has been after me to take that command for two years now. Maybe longer."

"He has?" _Two years? Why the hell didn't she take it?_

"Yes, sir. And before you ask, I didn't take it because I'm very happy right where I am, sir."

_How does she do that?_ "Ah, I see. Well, I'm not so sure General Greene will be willing to take no for an answer this time. When the Chief of Personnel endorses an assignment, it generally happens, Carter."

Sam's nonchalance at the situation suddenly faded as she faced the very real possibility that she might be unwillingly pulled away from the SGC. The thought of actually having to pack up and move away from her friends and job to the deserts of Nevada seemed less than appealing.

"Oh. Can you get me out of it, sir?"

Jack felt a wave of relief crash over him as he realized that Sam hardly wanted to take this assignment, and in fact had been turning it down for two years. So that eliminated one worry but left another larger one. The Chief of Air Force Personnel had signed off on this new assignment, and that would be much more difficult to circumvent. But he had to be one hundred percent sure staying at the SGC was something she wanted because if he went head to head with the Chief of Personnel over this, that bridge would likely be irrevocably destroyed and Carter would have zero chance of ever taking the position.

"Are you sure? Ya know you might not get another chance like this. Command of a whole legion of eggheads and more doodads to play with than you'd have time for? Isn't that at least a bit tempting?"

Sam threw him a wry smile. "Yes, sir, it is tempting. You know how much I love hanging out with the other eggheads. But really sir, I'm right where I want to be."

"Alright, if you're sure, I'll see what I can do about this whole thing. I'll make a few phone calls tomorrow morning."

"Thank you, sir."

"Don't thank me yet. We'll see what happens tomorrow."

TBC…


	2. Chapter Two

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Two**

Jack slammed the phone receiver down with a resounding crash. He had been met with one brick wall after another in his quest to keep Sam at the SGC; this last call was to General Hammond asking for his advice. Unfortunately, the General had reiterated what he had been hearing all morning. Once the Chief of Personnel signs off on an assignment, that's it. Game Over. It was hardly what Jack had wanted to hear.

Deciding he needed a break from his phone marathon, Jack decided to take a break and head down to the commissary for a fresh cup of coffee and if he was lucky a nice freshly baked piece of cake.

As he pushed through the double doors, Jack made a beeline for the coffee urn and after filling his cup full and selecting a piece of double chocolate cake turned and looked for a good place to sit and think through what he was going to do next. As he let his eyes sweep the room he found his gaze pulled inexorably toward one table toward the back wall and discovered his feet moving in that direction of their own accord.

Sam looked up as Jack approached, her eyebrows rising. Jack silently pulled up a chair across from her and sat down, unwrapping his cake and digging in with his fork. With the bite half way to his mouth he paused and looked over at Sam's face. Noting the expectant look in her eyes, he lowered the fork back down to his plate.

"No joy yet. But I'm not through yet. Got a couple more calls I can make."

Sam's face fell at the news. After spending a near sleepless night, she had convinced herself that O'Neill would be able to pull some strings for her so that she could stay at the SGC. "Nothing? What about General Hammond? Can he help?"

"Just got off the phone with him. He pretty much gave me the same song and dance I've been listening to all morning. Once the Chief signs off on a change of station, it is usually a done deal."

Sam's shoulders slumped, General Hammond had always been her ace in the hole, able to put off General Greene at Area 51 the last couple of times this issue had arisen. Now it seemed her run of luck had been exhausted and only one option was left to her. Take the position and leave SG-1 and the SGC behind, however reluctantly. _The needs of the Air Force, Colonel. It's all about the needs of the Air Force._

"So that's it. I start packing?"

"Not quite. General Hammond did have one suggestion."

"And that would be?"

"That I call General Greene directly. Try to work out some sort of compromise with him."

Sam couldn't help but allow some hopefulness to creep into her voice. "Do you think he'll go for that, sir?"

"Not sure. But it's worth a shot."

Sam nodded.

Digging back into his nearly forgotten cake, "Let's just hope General Greene is a reasonable man. I'd hate to have to threaten to send Teal'c down there to use some of his more persuasive Jaffa interrogation techniques on him."

Sam smirked, having seen for herself the effects that even one steely eyed look from the Jaffa could have on someone.

"Well sir, if you'll excuse me, I've got a mission briefing to finish up before tomorrow morning," Sam pushed back her chair and prepared to leave. "And sir?"

Jack looked up from his coffee. "Yeah?"

"Thank you. I really do appreciate everything you're trying to do for me."

"Yes well, I have purely selfish reasons for it."

"You do?" Sam asked, her surprise driving her eyebrows nearly up to her hairline.

"Yeah. Last thing I need is to have to replace another SG team leader. Most especially the CO of SG-1."

"Of course sir," Sam replied, her smile reaching all the way to her eyes as she stood and turned toward the doors.

"Carter?"

"Sir?"

"I'll call you when I get this worked out. And I _will_ get it worked out. Count on it."

Sam nodded once, then turned and headed back toward her lab. She didn't doubt O'Neill's willingness to "work this out", but she wasn't so sure that General Greene would give up on her, especially after going to such lengths to secure her transfer to Area 51.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Sam sat at her laptop, her attention wandering yet again. Not generally given to distractions, she found she was becoming somewhat annoyed with herself. Shaking her head, she bent again to her task, determined to finish her briefing and have it ready for the General's review within the hour. Just as she was putting the finishing touches on her work, a soft knock pulled at her attention and she looked up expectantly.

"Daniel, hey," Sam said, slightly disappointed.

"Hey, Sam. Had lunch yet?"

"I grabbed a bite a little while ago, but thanks anyway."

"No problem. Just thought you'd like to take a break for a while. We could get a cup of coffee or something if you'd rather."

"Nah. Last thing I need right now is caffeine."

"Okay, well. If you're sure…" Daniel said, trailing off somewhat as if there were more he wanted than just a friendly cup of coffee. Standing just to the side of her desk, Daniel stood shifting his feet, looking more than a bit nervous.

"So, we heard you're leaving to take command of the R&D at Area 51," Daniel blurted.

Sam was surprised enough that word had spread so quickly, that for a moment she didn't reply. Blinking, she took a breath to reply, but was cut off by Daniel.

"God, it's true isn't it? They're really going to send you to Nevada? I told Teal'c there was no way, I never thought the rumor mill was right. How the hell can they do that?" Daniel ranted on, becoming more agitated by the moment.

"Daniel, calm down. Nothing's set in stone just yet. General O'Neill is working on it for me."

"Of course, of course. Jack'll never let them take you away from us that easily."

Sam was a bit uncomfortable with the sentiment, but didn't contradict him either.

"Well, hopefully I'll hear something soon."

Daniel took in the nervous flutter of her hands, the way Sam's eyes wandered repeatedly over his shoulder to glance out into the hall and then back to him again, and knew her outward calm was a façade, and one that she was working hard to keep in place. Reaching out to still her restless hands, Daniel sought to reassure her.

"Don't worry, Sam. I'm sure it'll be fine."

Sam mustered up a small smile for him. "Yeah, it will be."

Daniel smiled in return then grasped her hands and pulled Sam to her feet. "Come on, let's get out of here. Waiting in here by yourself would make anyone a bit nuts."

Shaking her head but not resisting either, Sam followed Daniel down the corridor toward the commissary. Daniel was right about one thing, waiting with friends was always better than waiting alone.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

It was nearly three hours and two phone calls later that Jack found himself once again standing outside Carter's lab with what he hoped would be a compromise they all could accept. It had taken some strong arming on Jack's part, but in the end General Greene had been more accommodating than he had expected and the final solution had actually been Greene's suggestion.

Sam was once again bent low over her laptop, but her typing seemed half hearted at best compared with her enthusiasm from the day before. Jack knocked on the door jam, pulling Sam's attention away from her project.

"Sir. Come in."

Jack strode in, his hands jammed deep into his pockets. Stopping just short of Sam's workbench, he met her gaze squarely.

"You've worked it out," Sam said matter of factly.

Jack squinted his eyes slightly. "Sort of. General Greene has agreed to a sort of compromise. You'll officially be under his command and will work one week a month out of Area 51. You'll be expected to review all alien technology brought back during SGC missions and make out reports to the folks back at Area 51 prioritizing the stuff you think deserves the most attention."

"But the rest of the time, I'm here, right? I get to keep SG-1?"

"Yep. We'll work out the details of the mission schedule to be sure you get that week in Nevada every month, but otherwise you're still here."

Sam's surprise couldn't have been more complete. He really had worked it out. After seeing the General's dejection in the commissary earlier that day, she hadn't held out much hope.

"Thank you, sir," The sincerity in her heart communicated in her voice.

"Yeah, well. Don't mention it. Remember, selfish motives. It's gonna mean a lot of extra work for you. But it was the only way I could get Greene to agree."

Sam smiled, "Don't worry, sir. I can handle it if it means I can keep SG-1," The fear that her team could be stripped from her just when she was getting comfortable with command had been enough to strike fear into her heart. When she had first taken command, it had all seemed a bit overwhelming, but now her life in command of her team seemed as natural to her as her former role as 2IC had been.

As Jack turned to head back to his office and the ever growing pile of paperwork on his desk, Sam's voice caught his attention.

"Sir? The guys and I were going to get together tonight, have dinner and maybe a cheesy sci-fi movie. Interested?"

"Cheesy sci-fi? Will it have Mary Steenburgen in it?"

"Not sure she's ever done sci-fi, sir, but I'll see what I can find. 1900, my place?"

"Well now that's the best offer I've had in a while. I'll be there," Jack replied, a genuine smile creasing his face for the first time in far too long. The relief he felt at coming to an agreement with Area 51 was enough by itself to put a smile on his face. The reasons for his profound relief he chose not to think about. Much.

TBC…


	3. Chapter Three

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Three**

The evening passed in pleasant companionship as the once and current members of SG-1 spent their night eating and drinking together; something they had not had time to indulge in as a group since the General's promotion. Jack found himself more relaxed than he had been in weeks, and was reluctant for it to end. The meal and company were more than welcome and he appreciated the opportunity to no longer be "The General" and just be "Jack", even if for a short time.

Nursing a cold beer, sitting with his feet stretched out in front of him, Jack only half listened to the debate between Daniel and Teal'c, not really interested in the topic but more content to simply allow their voices to wash over him, a sense of familiarity leaving him feeling pleasantly warm. He could hear Carter puttering around in the kitchen, then silence as she finished up the cleaning. Jack expected her to join them in the living room and was somewhat surprised to hear the sliding door open as Sam slipped through to the back deck. Jack turned slightly to glance over his shoulder and out the back door, catching sight of Sam, her back to him, her face upturned toward the night sky. Her pensive stance struck him as odd and a bit disconcerting.

Pushing himself to his feet, Jack headed out the door Sam had used, closing it quietly behind him. Coming to stand at the railing at Sam's side, he followed her gaze up, familiar constellations passing before him like old friends. They stood in companionable silence, neither immediately inclined to speak. Finally Jack drew in a deep breath, gave Sam a sidelong look and decided to break the silence.

"So. Whatcha doin' out here by yourself?"

Sam half turned toward him, leaning one elbow on the railing. "Just needed some air, sir."

Jack nodded at the sentiment, his own need for solitude well known among his former team. "I can relate to that. Sure don't get much of that anymore, do we?"

Sam smiled slightly. "No, sir, we don't. Burdens of command."

"Yeah. So how's that goin' anyway? We haven't really had much time to talk since you took command of SG-1."

"Fine, sir. Better than I had imagined, actually. I expected some period of feeling awkward around the guys, but things have been going very smoothly."

"Well, just be sure you let me know if there's anything that comes up."

"I'm sure things will go just fine, but thank you for the offer sir. I'll keep that in mind."

Jack paused, carefully framing the question still niggling at the back of his mind. He knew there was something bothering Carter, and had honestly thought it was the newness of command. But now that she had reassured him things were fine on SG-1, he was at a loss to explain her recent tenseness. Not that anyone who didn't know Sam Carter well would have picked up on it, but after serving with the Colonel for just over eight years, Jack could read the subtle signs in her posture and manner. Not to mention the fact that for several weeks, Carter had been going home more or less on time.

But that had abruptly changed a bit over two weeks ago and she could be counted on to be found in her lab until well into the night. Not that Jack had been keeping tabs on her, exactly. Oh hell, who was he kidding? Of course he was checking up on her; on all of them, truth be told. He suspected he already knew her reasons for her shortening her usual 70 hour work week to something more respectable, but it wasn't something he really wanted to dwell on.

"So, how's everything else?"

The question quite frankly shocked Sam into speechlessness. Jack O'Neill was hardly someone who generally indulged in small talk unless he had a good reason. And it wasn't as though in the past they hadn't talked, as friends if nothing else. But for him to come right out and inquire about her life in general was certainly new territory for both of them. Sam pursed her lips for a moment, gazing back up toward the heavens that had so fascinated her as a child. How to answer such a loaded question?

Jack knew he had surprised her and was willing to patiently wait for Sam to reply. When she turned to look back up into the night sky, he briefly worried he had perhaps pushed a bit too far, into territory they had both implicitly agreed was off limits. After several quiet moments, she turned to face him again.

"Things have been sort of okay. Maybe. Or not."

Jack raised his eyebrows at her ambiguous response. "Just what does that mean?" He asked softly, genuinely wanting to know.

Sam bit her lip, her eyes flitting everywhere but to his. Her nervousness was almost palpable between them and Jack immediately regretted asking her about any of this.

"I'm sorry, it's none of my business. Forget I asked," Jack said, giving Sam a way out of a situation that was becoming increasingly uncomfortable.

"Don't be sorry, sir. It's just that I haven't actually told the guys yet."

Jack looked at Sam quizzically, his mind whirling with the possibilities that sprang unbidden to mind. _They actually set a date? Pre-wedding jitters? Avoiding the soon to be in-laws? _Jack froze. _She's pregnant?_ But before he could speculate further, Sam had drawn in a deep breath and plunged ahead.

"Pete and I broke up."

Jack's mouth popped open. That had been the furthest thing from his mind. He had thought they were happy together, engagement rings and talk of houses and all.

"What? When?" The questions popped out of his mouth before he could pull them back and Jack winced at his tact, or lack thereof.

Sam, however, smiled sadly, turning her attention back to the stars above. "I'm not sure I was all that surprised, really, after that whole thing with Osiris. I just couldn't get him to trust me. Trust that when I said it was classified it truly was classified, no matter what small amount of clearance he had been given to know about the program," Sam sighed slightly. "I really did think he could handle it, sir. Looks like I was wrong."

Jack nodded in sympathy, his own experiences with having to keep classified missions to himself something that had followed him through much of his adult life. "I really am sorry, Carter."

"It's alright, sir. Not the first time this sort of thing has happened to members of our command. Probably won't be the last time either."

"Yeah, but it's the first time it's happened to you. And that matters to me."

Sam turned wide, startled eyes to his face, gauging him. "Thank you, sir. I appreciate the sentiment. I'll be fine."

"Of course you will. But if you need anything, don't forget, Daniel's door is always open," Jack said, a mischievous smile creeping its way onto his face.

Sam's genuine smile reached all the way to her eyes and she ducked her head, chuckling softly. "I'll remember that, sir."

"Well, we should probably head back in before Daniel and Teal'c find the ice cream I brought and eat all of it before we get any."

"Can't have that, now can we, sir?"

"Hell no. It's my favorite too! Chunky Monkey."

Sam laughed lightly, feeling for the first time in the last couple of weeks as though things were finally getting back to normal.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Daniel knocked lightly on the doorway to Jack's office.

O'Neill looked up from his ever growing pile of administrative paperwork. "Daniel."

"You wanted to see me, Jack?"

"Yeah, come on in and close the door, will ya?"

Daniel closed the door softly behind him and sat down in one of the chairs just in front of Jack's desk. "So, what's up?"

Jack rearranged the memos on his desk a bit, then shifted in his seat to get more comfortable, but it didn't appear to be working. Daniel got the distinct impression that Jack was more than a little bit uncomfortable talking about whatever was on his mind, but was resolved to wait him out and let him bring the topic up in his own time.

Jack finally looked up, "So, how's things been going? On the team, I mean."

Daniel raised his eyebrows at the question. "Ah, fine, fine. Why? Something happen to give you the impression things weren't okay?"

"No, no. Not really. Just like to check up on things every now and then. Ya know, just to be sure."

"Oh, oh. I see. Well, no need to worry Jack, we're doing fine. We miss you out there of course, but we're doing good."

"How about Carter? She settling into command well?"

_Ah, now I get it._ Daniel realized. _This isn't about the team, this is about Sam._ "Great. She's doing great, Jack. She's been ready for this for a while, you know that."

"Has she been talking to you much lately? You know, about…stuff?" Jack again shifted in his seat, looking more uncomfortable by the moment.

Daniel's eyebrows again traveled nearly up to his hairline. "Yeah, we talk quite a lot. We are friends, ya know. Is there something in particular she was supposed to talk to me about?"

Now Jack knew he was on shaky ground. He honestly was worried about how the break up of her engagement was affecting Sam, personally rather than professionally since he had the utmost confidence in her abilities at work. But it was hardly his place to tell Daniel what had happened between Sam and Pete.

Daniel, being the perceptive person he was, picked up on the nature of Jack's discomfort and saved him from having to say something embarrassing. "This is about Pete, isn't it? Sam mentioned she told you Friday night."

Jack's relief was palpable. "Yeah. You think she's handling that whole….thing okay?"

Daniel smiled. "She'll be fine Jack. I got the feeling that she was never as confident in their relationship as Shanahan was. It almost seemed like it was a relief to her that it was over."

"Ah. Well, that's good. Good," Jack replied.

"So, things all smoothed out with Sam and Area 51?" Daniel inquired, his expression carefully schooled to be inquisitive but little more.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, that. Yeah. Everything's been taken care of. Paperwork's all been submitted. She officially reports to General Greene as of today."

"Well, that's good too. We'd hate to lose Sam from the SGC," Daniel replied, wondering if Jack had a clue at all where this conversation was going. Knowing that he likely didn't.

"Too damn true." Jack replied.

"So, she's going to report directly to General Greene?"

"Well, he will be writing her performance reports, but I'll still have some input on those. And day to day she'll get her direction from me and her superior officers in the SGC. But yeah, for all practical purposes she reports to…" Jack trailed off slightly, "Greene now."

Daniel watched as the realization dawned. _Well now, that wasn't so hard after all. Good boy, Jack._ The archaeologist smiled as he rose from his chair and turned toward the door. "Well, that's good to know, Jack. I was about to head down to the commissary, get some lunch. You coming with?"

Jack felt as though someone had set off a Jaffa stun grenade in his office. _I'll be damned._ He thought. _What the hell do I do now?_

"Come on Jack. We'll go have lunch and maybe after work we'll head over to Joe's, have a couple of beers and talk over old times. What'd'ya say?"

Jack rose from his chair, operating on autopilot. "Sure, Danny. That sounds great."

Daniel smiled again as he pulled open the door and stepped out into the entryway, feeling that for once, the universe finally seemed to be lining up in favor of two people who so richly deserved it.

TBC….


	4. Chapter Four

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Four**

It had been another crazy couple of months in the life of General O'Neill and the SGC. Several missions had been launched and recovered, with varying degrees of success and not without a few mishaps along the way. Jack had found himself running from one crisis to the next with barely enough time to choke down a piece of cake and a cup of coffee. By the time things had finally gotten back to what the SGC considered to be normal, he was more tired than he would have thought possible working a desk job.

He hadn't had time to worry about confronting other new developments in his life, as so eloquently pointed out by the SGC's resident archaeologist and all around busy body. Not that he would have been able to do anything about those recent developments. By the time things had calmed down enough for Jack to ponder having a conversation with Sam, she had gone to Area 51 for an orientation tour. Jack hadn't seen her for just over two weeks, and so had been allowed plenty of time to consider what to do, if anything, with his newfound freedom.

And certainly this was not his decision alone. Daniel had, in no uncertain terms, pointed out to him that he was now free to pursue a personal relationship with Sam. Simply the idea of it had left him feeling lightheaded with the possibilities. Daniel had also pointed out the fact that Sam's engagement had only just been called off, and for him to step up and ask her out within a couple of short weeks after that breakup would hardly be the way to approach the situation. But the thought that had been weighing heavily on his mind ever since that evening was whether or not Sam even wanted any sort of relationship with him.

Now, however, just over two months has passed and Jack felt as though it may be now or never. Sam should have returned from Nevada Thursday afternoon and had actually taken some leave on Friday, much to his surprise. So here it was, Saturday morning and Jack had the phone in one hand debating whether or not to call. He had been attempting to work the conversation out in his mind for the better part of the last five days and still didn't have a clue what he was going to say. An invitation to dinner seemed to be a given, but how to lead up to the question was the dilemma.

In the end, he simply dialed the phone, hoping that by the time Sam answered, he would think of something, or at least not sound like a complete idiot. The phone rang twice before it was picked up.

"Yeah, hello."

"Ah, mornin' Carter."

"General. Good morning, sir." Sam answered, the surprise evident in her voice. "Is there something wrong sir? Do you need me back at the base?"

"No. No, nothing like that. Just calling to see how the trip went."

"Oh. Well, it's certainly going to be a lot of extra work, but they have a good team put together at Area 51. Top notch people, sir. We should be able to do some good and hopefully build some better relations between them and the SGC."

"Them? Ya know, you are now technically "them", Carter."

There was a slight pause on the other end of the line. "Huh. Never really thought about it that way, sir. I still feel like I'm a part of the SGC."

"Oh, don't get me wrong, you definitely are, but you report to them now."

"Kind of like dual citizenship, sir?"

Jack chuckled slightly. "Yeah, kinda."

"So, how've things been at the SGC the last couple of weeks? Did I miss anything fun, sir?"

"Well, I managed not to kill Daniel, if that's what you mean."

Sam laughed lightly. "Don't worry, sir. I'll be sure to take him off your hands first thing Monday morning. I brought back a couple of projects from Area 51, one of which I think I can entice Daniel to help me with since it's got some sort of encryption that appears to be in the Ancient's language."

"I'd definitely appreciate that, Carter. I'm not sure how much longer my self control was going to last."

Sam chuckled at the image of General O'Neill actually holding back rather than letting Daniel have an earful, as he would have as SG-1's CO. Maybe the new rank and position was truly changing him, something she had never thought possible.

"So, ah…there was another question I had for you," Jack began uncertainly.

"Really, sir? What's that?"

"Well, actually…I was wondering what you were doing for dinner tonight?"

"I hadn't really thought about it yet. Probably nuke some soup or something. Why? You thinking about having the old team over, sir?"

"Not exactly, just one little bit of the old team. And I was thinking something a bit classier than our usual cookout in the backyard. Like The Olive Branch? Say around 1900?"

Sam was stunned. _Did he just ask me out? What the hell has gotten into him?_ "Ah, well…wow, sir. Umm….are you sure that's such a good idea?"

"Actually, Sam, I think it's just about the best idea that's come along in quite some time," Jack replied confidently. "Considering some recent changes to our command structure, I think it's a damn fine idea."

That stopped Sam cold. _Changes to our command struct...oh my God._ "I, um…I can't believe I hadn't thought of it that way."

"To be honest, neither can I, Carter. And here I thought you were the smart one," Jack replied, chuckling. "So, should I pick you up at 7?"

Sam wasn't sure later if it was the unexpected invitation or the fact that for years she had dreamed of just this moment, but the words were out of her mouth before she could take them back.

"Sure, sir. I'd very much like that."

"Great, Carter. See you then. Oh, and one other thing."

"Yes, sir?"

"See if you can lose the 'Sir' before 7."

"On one condition."

"And that would be?"

"You lose the 'Carter'."

"I'll see what I can do, Sam. See you tonight."

The phone disconnected and Sam stood staring at the idle handset clutched in her nerveless fingers. _What did I just do? Oh hell, face it Sam, you just did what you've wanted to do for years. Enjoy it._

"Now the big question. What am I going to wear?"

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The Olive Branch had been a Colorado Springs dining spot for over 20 years. In that time it built a reputation for good food, good atmosphere, and good prices. Sam and Jack were sitting in a quiet booth near the back of the main dining room, their voices low amongst the murmuring of the dinner crowd. The meal had passed pleasantly and Sam found herself, after a period of tense nervousness, slowly relaxing and beginning to enjoy the evening. The feeling that they were doing something wrong was never far from her mind, but as the meal progressed she realized that this truly was okay; that a relationship was finally possible.

The night had begun well, Jack appearing on her doorstep promptly at 7 pm. Sam had gone for a casual look, a low cut stretchy white top over tight black jeans, heeled black boots, and a black leather jacket. O'Neill's open mouthed reaction as he stood on Sam's front porch had validated the choice. Sam had blushed slightly at the frankly approving stare and had simply stepped out the door and past Jack, heading for the passenger door of the truck. Following Sam with his gaze, Jack turned to follow, lengthening his stride and reaching the vehicle just in time to open the door and hold it as Sam climbed inside.

The meal had been as good as the Olive Branch's reputation promised and Sam found herself contented, sipping on her second glass of Kendal Jackson chardonnay. She gazed across the table at her dinner companion. Sam had seen Jack O'Neill in many states and emotions ranging from silly to enraged, but tonight was different. Tonight he was more relaxed than she could ever remember, his smile never far from his lips as they chatted about everything imaginable, from politics to sports. But one topic had been rather elusive, and Sam found herself wondering more and more about it as the night wore on. Finally, she decided to bite the bullet so to speak, and simply ask.

"So."

"So?"

"Why tonight?"

"Tonight?" Jack asked, genuinely confused.

"Yeah. Why did you ask me out tonight? Why not the day my transfer became effective?"

"Oh, that. Ah. Well… that was sort of Daniel's idea."

"Daniel? What's Daniel got to do with it?"

"Well, someone had to knock me over the head and get me to ask. Certainly wasn't going to be Teal'c. He's more subtle than that."

Sam smiled at the image. "So Daniel knocked you over the head?"

"Figuratively speaking, of course. This is still Daniel we're talking about. He actually took me out for a beer."

"So it was his idea for you to ask me out?"

"Well, that was sort of my own idea, but Daniel helped with the timing a bit. He convinced me it wouldn't have been such a great idea if I asked you out right after you and Shanahan….you know."

"Broke up?"

"Yeah, that."

"Thoughtful of him."

"Yeah, that's Daniel for ya. So…are you…you know….?" Jack gestured aimlessly toward the open air between them.

"I'm fine. Really. Thank you for asking, though."

"Ah. Good then."

Sam looked up, their eyes met across the table, and suddenly that warm feeling that had been niggling in the pit of her stomach exploded through her chest, warming her from the inside out, causing her to suck in a startled breath in response.

Jack suddenly looked concerned. "Hey, you okay?"

Sam shook herself from her startlement. "Yeah, yeah," She replied, pulling in a deep breath and letting out slowly. "Great in fact. This was very nice, tonight. Thank you."

Jack allowed a smile to crawl across his face. "Anytime, ma'am. Anytime. How about we get out of here?"

"Sure."

Jack stood up and moved to hold Sam's chair, then helped her don her jacket before they headed out the doors and back to his truck. The evening air was crisp, the beginnings of winter turning the nights sharply colder. Sam pulled the collar of her coat closed as a gust of chill air blew past her. Jack again moved past her to pull open the passenger door of his truck and hold it as Sam climbed in. She couldn't help the small smile that crossed her face as Jack gently closed the door behind her and walked around to enter on the driver's side.

Jack caught Sam smiling at him as he pulled on his seat belt. "What?"

"Nothing. I just never pictured you as someone who opened doors and all of that."

"Really? I always thought that kind of came naturally to me. Why, does it bother you?"

"Surprisingly enough, no. It doesn't."

"Alright then."

They arrived at Sam's doorstep a few minutes after ten. Jack walked Sam up to her front door, pausing while she unlocked the door and pushed it open slightly.

"So, would you like to come in for some coffee?"

"I think if I come in for coffee, I'm going to want to stay for pancakes."

Sam felt her mouth go dry. "Oh."

"Yeah. Sam, I…I've wanted this for so long, I just don't want to do anything to screw it up."

"I know what you mean."

"You do?"

"Yeah, I think I've probably wanted this at least as long as you have. Maybe longer."

"You have? Really?"

Sam smiled gently. "Yes, really. Jack, I haven't exactly had the best of luck in relationships and the last thing I want to do is make a mistake with you. With us. Not after…" Sam trailed off. _Jonas. Pete._ Both mistakes. Both regrets.

"So, we'll be careful then. Okay?"

"I think I can handle that."

"Good. So, is dinner at my place tomorrow night careful enough?"

"I'm not sure…how careful is it to subject myself to your cooking?"

"Oh, now that hurts. That really hurts!" Jack said, grinning as his hand clutched his shirt over his heart.

Sam smiled at the theatrics. "So, what can I bring?"

"So is that a yes?"

"It's a yes."

"Then you bring the dessert. Anything chocolate."

They stood, looking at each other for several moments.

"So," Jack said simply.

"So."

"I should probably go."

"Yeah, probably."

But rather than turning toward his waiting truck parked on the street, Jack reached out and curled a hand around Sam's arm, sliding his hand down the butter soft leather until her hand was clasped in his. Reaching out with his free hand he cupped her cheek, drawing her face nearer to his until they were breathing the same air. Sam's breath caught in her throat, her eyes wide and luminous in the evening moonlight. Jack took a moment to simply look at her, drink in the beauty of her, before he bent his head ever so slowly, his lips hovering just above Sam's.

In a moment that was exquisite in it's magnificence, Jack's lips brushed Sam's, feather light at first, then increasingly demanding in a wave of passion that left them both breathless. He pulled back, his hand stroking her face. "You are so beautiful."

Sam's eyes filled and she blinked hurriedly to keep the tears from falling.

Jack grimaced slightly. "I'm sorry. That wasn't really all that careful was it?"

"No, no. It was fine. More than fine, actually."

"More than fine?" Jack smiled mischievously. "I always wanted to be 'more than fine'."

Sam grinned, then stepped closer to him again, the smell of soap, cologne, and a scent that would always be Jack O'Neill filling her nostrils as Sam angled her lips toward his, her kiss searing in its intensity. As they broke apart, Sam moved in to wrap her arms around his waist, allowing herself to sink gratefully into his embrace as Jack enveloped her in his arms, creating a cocoon of warmth against the night chill.

"Oh God," Sam breathed, this perfect moment overwhelming her.

They stood there on her front porch for what seemed like an eternity, each warmed by the other. Jack moved first, pulling back from their embrace and reaching up to brush his hand across her temple and through her hair. "You okay?"

"Yeah. This just feels so good. So right. Caught me a bit off guard."

Jack smiled at that. "So, I'll see you tomorrow night?"

"Wouldn't miss it."

"Great, I'll see you around 6 then."

"Okay," Sam said simply, reluctantly releasing her hold on Jack as he stepped back from her door and moved slowly toward his truck. He opened the door and turned back, smiling and giving her a small wave. Sam returned the gesture as she watched him turn the motor over and pull away from her curb. She followed the taillights of his truck as he turned the corner before entering her house and closing the door silently behind her.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Sam paused just outside Jack's door to smooth down the hem of her skirt. Generally she wasn't a vain person, but then again, how vain could you be when you spend most of your time off world living in the field? Sam was a bit surprised at herself. How many years had she known Jack? 7 nearly 8? And here she was, standing outside his door nervous about how she looked. _Get a grip, Sam._

She reached out and knocked lightly on the door. A few moments later the door swung open and Jack stood just to one side of the doorway.

"Hey there. Come on in."

"Hey. I brought New York Super Fudge Chunk. Hope that's okay."

"Sounds great. Let me put that in the freezer. Unless of course you want to just skip dinner and go straight for the ice cream?"

"As good as that sounds, I wouldn't want your hard work to go to waste."

"Right. Can I get you something to drink?" Jack asked, slipping Sam's jacket from her shoulders and hanging it in the nearby closet.

"A beer would be great, thanks," Sam said, stepping down into the family room and taking a seat on the nearby sofa. Jack returned with 2 bottles of Guinness, handing one to Sam and settling himself on the couch next to her, their knees not quite touching.

"So. Dinner should be ready shortly," Jack began, a sudden awkwardness causing him to feel somewhat self conscious. Although, for what reason he had no idea.

"What're we having anyway?"

"Oh, um…baked chicken, baby carrots, garlic mashed potatoes and a salad. Hope you came hungry."

"You made all of that? Yourself?"

"Well, yeah. You didn't think I sat around here eating pizza and burritos every night, didja?"

"To be honest, I sort of had you pegged for the frozen pizza kind of guy. Are you sure all of that didn't come out of a box from the freezer?"

"Hey now, first you doubt my gentlemanly gestures at dinner, now you're doubting my cooking skills. We're really going to have to work on your image of me."

"I've actually been pleasantly surprised so far. I'm discovering there's a great deal I don't know about you. And I'm looking forward to the chance to find out more."

Jack smiled. "I was hoping you'd say that."

The timer sounded from the kitchen and Jack excused himself to put the finishing touches on dinner. Sam listened to him putter around for a few moments before following, leaning against the doorframe that separated the dining room from the kitchen sipping on her beer.

"Anything I can do to help?"

"Sure. You can take the salads to the table. What kind of dressing do you like? I've got ranch and um….ranch," Jack frowned at the refrigerator.

Sam laughed lightly. "I guess in that case I'll take the ranch," Picking up the salad bowls and bottle of dressing, she headed back into the dining room, setting her burden down on the table.

"Go ahead and have a seat, I'll be right in," Jack called from the kitchen.

Sam pulled out a chair and took her seat, turning to see Jack entering the room carrying two steaming plates.

"Wow. That smells great."

Jack grinned and set a plate in front of Sam. "Go ahead and dig in. Hopefully it tastes as good as it smells."

Sam picked up a fork and cut off a small bite of the chicken, tentatively bringing it up to her mouth. The flavors exploded on her tongue. "Oh wow. I think it actually tastes better than it smells. This is wonderful."

"Ya know what, you're right. This is pretty good," Jack said, a bit incredulously.

"You sound surprised."

"I am, a little. I've never tried baking chicken before. I wasn't quite sure what to expect."

"Well, for a first timer, you sure did get it right."

They ate in companionable silence until their plates were nearly cleared.

Sam sat back in her chair, draining the last of her beer. "I don't think I could eat another bite. That was wonderful, Jack. Thank you."

"So, no room for New York Super Fudge Chunk huh? Now that's just a shame."

"Hey now, I didn't say that! Just give me an hour or so and I'll be ready for round two," Sam replied, smiling.

Jack's grin widened. "Far be it for me to keep a woman from her chocolate ice cream," He stood, ignoring Sam's playfully indignant glare, and picked up the empty plates to deposit them in the sink before returning to the table and reclaiming his seat.

"So," Sam said simply.

"So?"

"What's tomorrow going to be like?"

"It's going to be different, that's for sure."

"Yeah. Different. But good, I think."

"You know people are going to talk, right?"

"Jack, people have been talking for years. Now they'll just have something real to talk about."

"Well now, that's true enough. But now that there's something real to talk about, things might get a bit more…intense. Especially for you."

"I can handle myself."

"I never said you couldn't. I'm just sayin'."

"I know. Really, though, I'll be fine. But we should probably set some ground rules for when we're at work."

"Such as?"

"Well, making out in the control room is probably out."

Jack grinned. "Ah, yeah. That would be a given."

"I guess we just try to act the way we always have. I don't think I'm going to be able to pretend I barely know you, but eyebrows are going to rise if you suddenly start spending all your time in my lab."

"Okay, so no making out in the control room and no spending all my day in your lab. Anything else?"

Sam smiled, but her expression faded to one of utter seriousness. "Are you sure we can do this? Are you sure we should?"

The questions stopped Jack cold and sent his heart pounding in his chest. Never had he considered the possibility that Sam wouldn't want this. That she would consider a relationship while they were still working together at the SGC to be too difficult. _Arrogant Jack. Very arrogant. You never considered that maybe Sam wouldn't want the headaches that come with dating someone she works with._

Jack consciously tried to will himself to calm down before attempting to speak. "Are you saying you don't want to do this?"

"I'm just giving you one last chance to…reconsider. If you want."

Jack moved his chair closer to the corner of the table and Sam's seat, reaching out to pull her hand into his. He could feel the tremors running through her cold fingers and suddenly realized that this conversation was just as difficult for her as it was for him.

"Sam, nothing at the SGC could cause me to reconsider. Nothing. But if you don't want to deal with all the crap…well then, if that's what you want, okay."

"No. No that's not what I want, Jack. I want this. Us. No matter how hard it might be at work. I just wanted to give you one last chance to say stop."

Jack blew out a breath. "You realize you just scared the crap outta me, right?"

"I'm just glad you didn't take me up on it. And I wanted to be sure we both knew what we are getting ourselves into."

"Oh, I think I have a pretty good idea," Jack replied before leaning across the table and kissing Sam gently, then the kiss deepened to something more passionate. Jack pulled back slightly to look Sam squarely in the eyes, allowing her to see the depth of his feelings reflected in his gaze.

"Sam, I have never wanted anything as much as I want this. Believe me."

"I do, Jack. I do believe you."

"Okay then. So, ready for ice cream now?"

Sam's face broke into a small smile. "I'll get the spoons."

TBC…


	5. Chapter Five

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Five**

As the weeks progressed Jack's prediction of talk at the SGC proved to be something of an understatement. At first, the scuttlebutt had been moving through the corridors faster than the Marines during an alert. But finally talk began to calm and move on to new and more interesting topics and away from the new couple who had given the rumor mill little fodder for their lunchtime gossiping.

Through it all, Sam and Jack kept their contact at work strictly professional and left any personal interactions for his home or hers. It wasn't as though they didn't want to go out, but between their work loads and the rumors of favoritism at work, Jack had suggested that perhaps some time out of the public eye, even off duty, might not be a bad idea.

On her first day back at the SGC after her trip to Area 51, Sam had pulled Daniel and Teal'c aside and filled them in on all that had happened over the weekend. Originally, she was going to casually suggest breakfast in the commissary, but scratched that plan when she considered how exuberant Daniel could be sometimes. Instead, she asked them to join her in town for dinner, seeking to keep her private life as far from the base and its prying eyes and ears as possible.

They met at a local pizza parlor and had plowed their way through two large sausage and pepperoni pizzas and a pitcher of beer before Sam felt relaxed enough to broach the subject she had wanted to discuss with her team. While she was finishing up the last of her dinner, her mind continued to run through possible reactions so she could be ready to respond. _Stop it Sam. These are your friends. Just give them the benefit of the doubt, already._

After a few moments of companionable silence as they handed over their empty plates to the waiting server Daniel decided to break the ice, having already surmised the true purpose for this "team building dinner".

"So. How was your weekend?"

Sam looked up, slightly startled. "Fine. Yours?"

"Sam…"

"Daniel."

Teal'c's eyebrow cocked quizzically.

Sam couldn't suppress a grin. "You'd think after all these years I'd be used to Daniel being a step ahead of me," She paused then, looking at her hands, trying to quickly form her thoughts into a coherent statement. Seemingly without her control, a steady stream began flowing from her mouth.

"Before the rumor mill on the base gets started, I thought I should inform both of you that Jack and I have decided to see each other outside work … to pursue a personal relationship. Due to the fact that I am no longer officially under General O'Neill's command, the fraternization rules no longer apply. I believe that we'll both be able to maintain our professional relationship, and maintain the status quo, but if you guys have any objections, or any reason to feel uncomfortable about this, then I think we should discuss this as a team. I don't want our relationships in or out of work to be affected and I…"

"Sam!"

At his exclamation, Sam's head jerked up to look at Daniel.

The archaeologist was grinning from ear to ear. "Breathe, Sam."

Teal'c's face creased into a small, sage smile. "Indeed."

Sam released the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. "So, you two are alright with this?"

Daniel nodded. "Sam, it's been obvious for a long time how you and Jack feel about each other. I'm happy for both of you that you can finally do something about it."

Sam looked over at Teal'c for further assurance. "Teal'c?"

Teal'c was looking at her now with such seriousness, that she began to worry. "Samantha, I have been aware of your feelings for General O'Neill, and his feelings for you, for some time. I am extremely pleased that you will now have the freedom to express those feelings."

Sam felt as though a boulder has been lifted off her shoulders. She wasn't sure why she had been worried. These were her best friends in the world. Hell, her best friends in the universe. She should have known they would be as supportive in this as in every other endeavor. "Okay, then," Sam looked from Daniel to Teal'c, a smile playing over her face. Daniel smiled, nodded and reached out to pick up his drink raising it up in front of him.

"To Sam and Jack, and many happy years together."

Teal'c followed suit and Sam's smiled broadened as she lifted her glass. "And to good friends."

"Indeed."

Drinking from their respective glasses, Sam felt as though all was finally right with her world.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The discovery of each other as their relationship began to take shape came as something of a surprise to Jack. He found himself pleasantly surprised at the side of Sam Carter that was slowly emerging. This was the side of Sam who could be shyly uncertain of herself in their new found closeness. The side to her that enjoyed a good romantic movie versus a technical journal; the side who could relax and smile and laugh over a comfortable dinner by soft candlelight. The side of Sam that wasn't at all afraid to simply sit on the couch and be held.

If he hadn't been in love with her before this discovery, he certainly was now, not that he had actually said the words out loud yet. This Sam could be feminine without losing any of the strength of character that had attracted him in the first place. Not that Sam wasn't feminine already, he could hardly count himself a man if he had missed that little detail. Hell, let's face it, she's HOT. But this part of Sam endeared her to him even further. It was almost as if he she was allowing him to take control, to be a protector; a role he had become rather accustomed to in his previous relationships, but hadn't expected to find with Sam. A role that made him feel wanted and needed and he was surprised to find just how good it made him feel.

However, this role of protector had its downside as well, especially when they were on base. Jack found it increasingly on his mind the dangers Sam faced in their day to day work environment and had to consciously pull himself back from those feelings of protection. Something that Sam neither wanted nor needed at work. So when a mission came up and SG-1 was next in the rotation Jack didn't hesitate to assign them, but it was never far from his mind what could happen at any time when they stepped through the 'gate.

They had in fact discussed just that fear not long ago over a quiet dinner at Sam's after a particularly difficult week for the both of them.

_Jack had been under the usual pressures from the President and the Pentagon, but for some reason this week seemed to wear on him more than usual. Sam had been under pressure from Jack to complete a key analysis of some pieces of Goa'uld technology that had recently been acquired by other SG teams. They hadn't seen each other outside work for the entire week and by Friday evening, they were both worn down by the stress and long hours of the week that they agreed to meet that evening for dinner to get a head start on what they hoped would be a relaxing weekend._

_The conversation during dinner had been light, about everything and nothing. Cassie's school work, her latest change in major, the early change in the weather this year, whether or not to watch the Simpsons or King of the Hill. Sam wasn't sure later who had brought it up, but the conversation suddenly took on a much more serious tenor._

"_Jack, are you telling me you've thought about pulling us from a mission? You would seriously do that?"_

"_Hey, I only said I'd thought about it, not that I'd actually do it. I'm sorry, Sam, I can't help but think about it. I can't stop thinking about it some days when you're out there and I'm stuck back here, not knowing what's going on."_

_Sam's expression softened from indignation to understanding. "I know it's hard for you, Jack. I really do. But this is what I do, it's what I love. I'm not likely to give it up willingly anytime soon."_

"_I know. And I would never ask you to. But I can't help it. I want to keep you out of harm's way. It's the over-controlling alpha male in me. It's genetics. Unavoidable," Jack shrugged, attempting to throw off his concern. But Sam wasn't so easily put off._

_Sam reached out to take Jack's hand in her own, absently rubbing her thumb along the backs of his knuckles. "I kind of like that 'over-controlling alpha male' side of you, ya know."_

_Jack's surprise must have shown on his face and had Sam laughing in response._

"_Don't look so surprised. I'm not that different from other women, am I? We all like to be taken care of, at least some of the time. But so help me, if you breathe a word of that to Teal'c or Daniel...you'll regret it."_

_That brought an answering smile to Jack's face. "No, of course you're not different. But I'm still figuring that out. You're usually...I dunno...more assertive than that. I just wasn't expecting it."_

_Sam's smiled widened as she released Jack's hand to reach for her coffee mug. "We both know what we do is dangerous. But if we don't take on that danger, who should? All the times we've saved the world, even if no one outside the mountain knows about it, that means something to me."_

"_Even the times when things didn't work out? The times when the end of the mission means a bed in the infirmary? It's not the times we saved the world that worry me, Sam. It's the times things went wrong."_

"_Jack, there's no way to protect me from everything. You know that. I could die tomorrow driving to work. When it's fated to happen, it'll happen, and nothing we do or say can stop it."_

"_Do you really believe that?"_

"_What, in fate? After all we've seen, all we've been through, it's the only thing that makes sense. Why else am I even still here, still alive if not for fate? Or just pure dumb luck."_

"_Yeah, luck. Eventually luck runs out though. It always does," Jack murmured quietly, his gaze skittering away from Sam's._

_Sam's smile faded, her expression becoming concerned. "Jack look at me."_

_Jack knew he was caught; he knew the look in his eyes would give him away, but he couldn't deny her and slowly turned his head so that their gazes met._

_The look Sam saw in his eyes surprised and shocked her. He was afraid; a fear that went deeper than she realized. "I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here and I'm going to always be right here."_

"_You can't know that, Sam. You can't promise me that. Damn it, I've seen you die. I just don't think I can handle that happening again. Not now."_

_Sam paused for a moment, unsure what to say. She then pushed back her chair, got up and came to kneel at Jack's side, looking at him directly. "You're right. I don't know that for sure. No one ever does. But what I do know is that I care about you, very much, and there is nothing in this universe that will stop me from doing everything in my power to come home to you."_

_Jack stared deep into Sam's eyes, measuring her resolve; measuring his own._

"_Do you believe me?" Sam prompted._

_Jack seriously considered her question before answering. "Yes, I do. It's not about belief or trust Sam. You'll always have that from me. It's just going to take me some time to get comfortable with this."_

_Sam smiled and leaned in to place a gentle, loving kiss on his lips. "You can have all the time you need, Jack."_

_He nodded in reply, reaching up to pull Sam's head back down to kiss her forehead. "Thank you."_

"_For what?"_

"_Everything," Jack replied simply, meaning it in every sense of the word._

Thinking back on that conversation now, Jack felt a bit foolish. He knew Sam was right, but he also knew that those fears would be with him as long as Sam remained an active member of SG-1, stepping out of the 'gate into unknown situations on a fairly regular basis.

Gazing across the conference table at her as she attempted to explain why they needed to visit P7X-035, Jack felt the weight of his duty pressing down over the knowledge that he would do almost anything to keep her safe. In the end, as always, his dedication to his duty prevailed.

"Okay campers, go for it. You ship out at 0900 tomorrow morning."

Jack kept his eyes on the mission outline in front of him as SG-1 pushed back from the table and headed out into the corridor. It wasn't until he looked back up that he realized he wasn't alone.

"Something I can do for you, Colonel?"

Sam pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes briefly before replying. She could feel his unease as if it were a living thing standing between them, and she wanted to know what she had done to cause it before she left on this mission.

"Everything okay, sir?"

Sam watched as surprised rippled ever so fleetingly across his face before Jack closed it off, his eyes taking on the cool veneer of command.

"Sure. Everything's fine."

"You sure, sir? You seemed a bit…distracted, during the briefing."

"I heard every word, Carter. You're going to P7X-035. Daniel's going to go dig up his bits of stuff, you and Teal'c will hopefully keep him from falling into another sink hole," Jack replied, a smirk gracing his mouth.

"Now, sir. You know that only happened once and Teal'c was standing right next to him when he did and he still couldn't keep Daniel from going over into the hole."

"My point exactly."

Sam realized she was being gently but firmly steered away from her original question and decided to let it go, for now. "Yes, sir. Of course. You busy tonight? I was going to make Thai peanut stir fry, about 1900, if you're interested."

"That sounds great, Carter. I'll be there."

"Great, see you then, sir. Have a good afternoon."

"Oh yeah, like that's gonna happen. I've got Doctors Lee and Felger in here right after lunch. That'll probably last at least until quitting time tonight," Jack replied, grimacing.

"Now, sir, it can't be that bad."

"Easy for you to say, you understand what they're saying."

Laughing lightly Sam turned and headed toward the stairs to the control room. "See you tonight, sir."

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Ba'al stood, his head held high to look down upon those arrayed before him. They had all served him loyally for many years, a dozen of his best and brightest, and now he would put that loyalty to the ultimate test. He paced slowly in front of them, their eyes never leaving him as they waited expectantly for him to speak. Ever the master of anticipation he waited, perhaps for a few moments longer than some of them would have expected, before opening his mouth to speak.

"My loyal servants, I have need of your services in a quest that will lead to the ultimate conquest of the galaxy. My operatives have discovered a weapon that will shift the balance of power in my favor and place me as the sole System Lord to rule over all!" Ba'al paused, allowing the weight of his words to sink in.

"You will be charged with further developing this weapon to serve our needs. This weapon must be ready to use against the Tok'ra and their Tau'ri lackeys before the next meeting of the System Lords. They must know the power I possess and my willingness to use it against any of them who would dare challenge me! You will depart immediately for the planet known as Kianon. There you will succeed! You will unleash this weapon to our enemies before the completion of the next Kianon lunar cycle. Your mission must be held in the utmost secrecy. Leave no trace of your presence on the planet. Leave no marker of your arrival or departure. Kianon is a remote and backward world where you should remain undetected for the duration of your work there."

Ba'al paused again, gazing into the eager and expectant faces of the best and most brilliant scientific minds he had available within his ranks. He had no doubts they would work day and night to have the weapon ready in time to please their god and master. His only worry was whether or not the weapon would be as powerful as he had been led to believe.

"Go now! For the glory of your god, Ba'al!"

Snapping smartly to attention, heels clicking, arms straight at their sides, Ba'al's minions bowed together at the waist and then turned to file silently from the room.

TBC…


	6. Chapter Six

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Six**

It was 0700 when Sam entered the locker room to gear up for their mission. She had spent a relaxing evening with Jack, mainly curled up on the couch watching some mindless sci fi television. She knew there was still something bothering him, something down deep, but every time she had tried to get close to whatever it was, the conversation had been steered in another direction. He had left early, with the excuse that she needed to get to sleep early. 'Don't wantcha nodding off during the mission tomorrow.' He had said, his usual bravado masking anything else he might have been feeling.

But she was learning to read him better as their time together grew, and her sleep was hardly what had been dragging at his attention. Sam bent down to lace up her boots, pushing her personal worries aside. Now wasn't the time to dwell on them; now she needed to be focused and prepared. She knew that the minute she started taking what seemed to be routine missions through the 'gate lightly would be the day she or one of her team might not come back. And that simply wasn't an option.

By the time she finished up or shut down several projects she had working in her lab and drew her gear from the quartermaster and weapon's officer it was nearly 0845 and time to meet the guys. She strode through the doorway to the 'gateroom, unsurprised to find Teal'c already kitted up and waiting for her. And as equally unsurprised to see that Daniel had yet to arrive. Throwing Teal'c an exasperated smile, she was about to have Daniel paged when he skidded to halt at the base of the ramp just as the wormhole was established.

"Sorry," He at least had the manners to look as though he meant it.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what you always say," Sam replied before turning toward the control room and catching Jack's eye. "SG-1 all present and accounted for, sir. Ready to embark."

The General leaned over to grasp the microphone. "You have a go, kids. Be good. Don't forget, home by 11."

Sam smiled, "Will do, sir. Keep the light on for us."

Jack nodded, stuffing his hands down into his pockets as he watched them climb the ramp and one by one disappear through the event horizon. The niggling feeling he'd had since Daniel had first briefed them on this mission hadn't diminished, but he didn't have any solid reason not to authorize the trip. He normally wouldn't have ignored such intuitions, but this time it seemed as though his usual instincts were being clouded by his personal feelings for Sam and that was something he couldn't allow.

And so, he watched them go, and knew that the next two days would be long and difficult and he expected sleepless as well, but it couldn't be helped. He still had a base to command and other teams to see to. As the wormhole closed he finally turned away from the windows and returned to his office and the responsibilities that lay within.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Daniel shook off the lingering cold and vertigo as he stepped through the event horizon onto P7X-035. The briefing he had delivered the day before had outlined the ruins and Goa'uld technology they hoped to find on the planet. The archaeologist was cautiously optimistic, having learned of this planet from the Tok'ra shortly before the dissolution of the alliance. Things had been so chaotic after the partnership between the Tau'ri, Rebel Jaffa, and Tok'ra failed that now several months later they were getting their first look at the planet.

Once a remote part of Ra's influence, the Tok'ra were reasonably sure the planet was no longer under any direct control of any one System Lord. Jack had scoffed at Daniel's mention of those assurances, having been on the wrong end of a Tok'ra surety one too many times over the last eight years. However, he had allowed the mission to proceed, also admitting that no matter how suspect their intel may be, they needed to be sure. If there was Goa'uld technology to be found on this planet, Jack wanted to be sure it was the SGC and not the Tok'ra or Goa'uld that got to it first. Jack had admitted the whole thing made him uneasy; the fact that there may be Goa'uld technology on this planet waiting for someone to come along and scoop it up and that the Tok'ra had known about it but done nothing was disturbing to say the least.

Sam and Teal'c had preceded him through the 'gate and were now standing on either side of a short flight of stone steps, scanning the tree line ahead of them. Daniel stood at the base of the stairs, waiting for his teammates to signal the all clear so they could move on. Daniel had learned over the years that it did him little good to gripe about the waiting ritual he was forced to endure each time they 'gated to an unknown planet. Too often this caution had saved their lives.

After several moments, Sam turned to catch Teal'c's eye and at his slight nod she gave the order to move out.

"How far is it to the ruins from here?"

"According to the Tok'ra surveys, just over a kilometer from here. Shouldn't take us long to get there, not much between us and the temple but some stands of trees," Daniel replied.

Sam nodded in reply. "Okay, we head to the temple, take a look around. Get inside if we can. When we get there Teal'c, you'll take perimeter while Daniel and I go inside. Stay sharp guys, I don't want any surprises while we're here. No way to know for sure if the Goa'uld have really abandoned this place or not."

"Understood, Colonel Carter."

Moving as silently as possible across the leaf strewn forest floor, it took them less than twenty minutes to reach a large clearing; at its center stood the temple to Ra, just as the Tok'ra had described it. Throwing her hand up to call for a halt, Sam approached the edge of the tree line and knelt down on one knee, pulling out her binoculars to get a closer look.

Scanning the outer surface of the temple and the surrounding open ground, Sam saw nothing to indicate that anyone had been there in decades if not hundreds of years.

"Teal'c, see anything I'm missing?"

"I do not. It appears to be deserted."

"Okay, single file. I'll go first then Daniel, Teal'c you bring up the rear. Keep your spacing out there. I don't want us to get caught bunched up and in the open."

"Okay, Sam."

"Understood."

With a nod, Sam stood and cautiously eased out and into the open, her eyes restlessly scanning the trees surrounding them along with the temple itself. She had learned a hard lesson long ago that just because things seemed innocent enough, didn't mean they were truly safe. Ring transporters rarely left any traces behind, especially if they dropped enemy Jaffa inside a structure; like a temple. Sam was nearly half way across the clearing when she felt the hairs on the back of her neck raise. Slowing her steps, she did a quick 360, searching for whatever had set her senses on edge. Seeing nothing, but still feeling as though she were being watched, Sam picked up her pace again, quickly reaching the temple wall and crouching down at its base.

Daniel waited until Sam was several feet in front of him to make his way across. The archaeologist moved swiftly, reaching the wall and taking a knee next to his teammate. A few moments later, Teal'c also reached the temple wall safely and took up his position at the corner where two of the temple's walls came together, giving him a vantage point where he could cover two directions nearly simultaneously.

Relieved that they had made it this far, but still feeling uneasy, Sam motioned for Daniel to join her as they began to search for an entrance. Daniel began a thorough scan of the temple walls, searching for any markings or writings to indicate a doorway of any type. Sam, meanwhile was working her way in the other direction, running her hands along the rough stones hoping to find some seam or chink to indicate the presence of a door.

After several minutes of fruitless searching, Sam was about to call Daniel back to regroup when she heard him call out.

"Hey, come here, I think I found something."

Turning back the way she had come, Sam found Daniel staring intently at a small section of the temple wall, the stone there a slightly different shade than the rest of the structure and that appeared to be covered in tiny scratches that to her untrained eyes looking nothing like Goa'uld.

"What've you got?"

"Well, it's writing of some sort, kind of like Sanskrit, but not exactly. But I think I can decipher it. Just give me a couple of minutes here."

"I'm gonna go check on Teal'c. I'll be right back."

"Okay," Daniel replied, his attention already fully focused on the task at hand.

Sam knelt next to Teal'c, her eyes never leaving the area around them. "See anything yet?"

"I have not."

"There's something out there. Something watching us. I'm sure of it."

"As am I. We should not remain here long, Colonel Carter."

"Agreed," Sam said, then rose to rejoin Daniel.

"Anything?"

"Uh…what? Oh, um, yeah actually. If I'm reading this right, this is the control panel that opens the portal."

"Do you know how it works?"

"Let's see," Daniel replied, pressing a series of inscriptions lightly but firmly. As he pressed and released the final character, a section of the wall retracted from the surface and slid open to reveal a long, dark corridor.

"Whoa. I didn't see the door there at all. We could've searched for days and not found it," Daniel said excitedly.

"Yeah. Okay, we'll take it slow. Let me go first, you see or hear anything you let me know okay? If things go to hell, get yourself out. Don't wait for me."

"Sam…"

"Daniel, I'm not kidding. If things go south I want you on your way out," Sam held his gaze for several beats before Daniel let his eyes drop and she knew she had won this round.

Reaching for her radio, Sam keyed the mic. "Teal'c, come in."

"Go ahead, Colonel Carter."

"Daniel's found the entry. We're headed inside. Stay sharp. Call out if you see anything. We'll check in every fifteen minutes."

"Understood."

Sam switched on the small flashlight mounted to her P-90 and proceeded into the darkened entryway, Daniel following a few paces behind. They worked their way slowly down the dank hallway, Sam's flashlight the only illumination to be seen. Sam moved cautiously, stopping every few feet to listen carefully for any signs that they were not alone. The feeling of being watched had only intensified now that they were inside the structure, putting Sam on edge.

As they neared the end of the corridor, they found themselves at a crossway and had to make a decision to go either right, left, or straight ahead. Gazing in each direction, Daniel could see no markings or writings to indicate a probable direction for them to take. Sam reached out to lightly touch his arm, drawing his attention down the left hand corridor.

"What?"

"Do you see that?" Sam whispered.

"See what?" Daniel softly replied.

"I think I see a bit of a glow coming from down there."

"A glow? Like a light?"

"Or a power source."

"Okay then, left it is."

Sam again took the lead, keeping herself close to the walls as she moved slowly and deliberately down the corridor and toward the steadily growing light at its end. They were within several feet of what appeared to be another doorway along the smooth corridor walls when Sam suddenly froze and pressed herself into the wall, throwing her arm across Daniel's chest and pressing him against the wall behind her. Daniel raised his eyebrows in silent question, but Sam merely placed a finger to her lips then motioned for him to stay put.

Daniel did as he had been instructed, watching as Sam drew closer to the opening, then paused just before reaching it, cocking her head to listen. That's when Daniel heard what had alerted his teammate, the low voices coming from inside the room were speaking Goa'uld. The archaeologist could only make out one word in three, but what he could hear chilled him. _Earth…Tau'ri…weapon…Ba'al._ Risking detection and Sam's irritation at disobeying her orders, Daniel moved closer, straining to hear more. Sam urgently motioned him to stay where he was, but he ignored her as the voices from inside the room became more distinct.

"_Lord Ba'al will be pleased. We are well ahead of schedule. We will be ready to use the weapon on the Tau'ri by the end of the lunar cycle."_

"_Beware your overconfidence. We still have much to do before that day comes. I care not to displease our Lord if this should fail."_

"_Yes, of course, Master."_

"_Have you prepared the device for tomorrow's test?"_

"_Yes, Master. All is in readiness. What do you hope it will do, sir?"_

"_If our Lord's informants are correct and this weapon works as they claim, it has the power to wipe out every living animal, be it man or beast, in moments. The Tau'ri and Tok'ra have nothing that can defend against it. But it leaves the structures and vegetation in tact."_

"_A brilliant weapon, sir! With this we can wipe out anyone in our way and appropriate their bases and technology for our own purposes."_

"_Yes. If it works."_

Daniel's eyes widened. _Test it? On us? Earth? Oh my God, we've got to warn Jack!_ He knew he had to let Sam know what he had heard, but they were too close to the enemy Jaffa to risk speaking. Reaching out, he tugged at her sleeve, jerking his thumb over his shoulder back down the corridor. Sam nodded and waved him on, keeping herself between him and the open doorway. Once they were down the hall and around the nearest corner Daniel stopped.

"What? What did you hear?" Sam whispered urgently.

"They're Ba'al's Jaffa. They have some sort of weapon they are set to test on Earth by the end of some lunar cycle."

"What kind of weapon?"

"I'm not sure, and it sounds like they aren't sure either."

"What do you mean?"

"They're not sure it will work. But if it does, it has the power to wipe out living beings in seconds, leaving the infrastructure and technology completely intact."

"Oh my God."

"Yeah."

"We have to warn the General. Let's get out of here, we'll meet up with Teal'c and get back to the 'gate ASAP," Turning away from Daniel, Sam led the way back toward the outer doorway they had come through only minutes before, moving much more quickly now that they knew they were not alone in the temple. As they neared the doorway Sam heard two brief clicks come through her vest radio and slid to an abrupt stop as Daniel nearly crashed into her from behind.

"What? Why're we stopping?" Daniel asked breathlessly, only to have Sam thrust her hand over his mouth to silence him, her eyes wide. Two clicks of the radios had been their pre-arranged danger signal. If any of them spotted trouble but either couldn't call on the radio or couldn't risk the sound of the radio being heard on the other end, two clicks would let the entire team know there was trouble.

Sam dropped her hand from Daniel's face and mouthed, "Teal'c. Trouble," It was all he needed to see. Gently he eased his 9mm out of its holster and nodded; he was ready to follow Sam wherever she led him. They began to move again and as they neared the doorway Sam slowed, raising her weapon to her shoulder and leaning out slightly to get a better look outside. A glimpse of motion, just to the right of the door, caught her eye and she quickly yanked her head back inside. Listening intently for sounds of the Jaffa she suspected was just outside. But how many, she couldn't be sure.

Hearing nothing, she motioned to Daniel to stay behind her and then squared her shoulders and approached the opening her weapon raised and ready. Not knowing the situation worried her, but they had little choice. They couldn't stay inside the temple without risking detection, they couldn't go outside without risking the same. Stepping out into the sunlight, Sam trained her weapon first to the right and seeing nothing turned back to the left. The Jaffa were no longer in sight and she motioned for Daniel to follow her out.

Moving deliberately, Sam led Daniel into the open and using hand signals ordered him to make for the trees. Daniel shook his head adamantly, but Sam was insistent, signaling toward the trees again. Daniel glared defiantly at her, refusing to budge. Sam blew out a frustrated breath and began moving toward where they had left Teal'c. Not expecting to find him still in his original position, the corner of the temple was closest to the tree line and would give them the shortest open distance to cross.

They hadn't taken more than two steps when the wall next to them erupted in a shower of flying stone chips. The staff blast came from nearly behind them and Sam whirled around to face it, reaching out to shove Daniel behind her.

"Daniel, move! Run for the trees!" Sam shouted over her shoulder as she trained her weapon on the advancing Jaffa and squeezed the trigger. There were only three of them and Sam managed to take out one of them before they returned fire and forced her to duck under their blasts, the back of her head and neck showered with razor sharp shards of stone. She could feel the blood begin to trickle down under her shirt, but she ignored it and the pain, focusing entirely on the enemy in front of her.

She was peripherally aware of Daniel as he headed for the trees, returning fire of his own as he reached for his radio to signal Teal'c. With all the weapons fire, there was no longer any need for stealth. Any Jaffa within earshot would be able to hear the battle and would come running.

"Teal'c! Teal'c where are you? We're under fire!"

Only seconds later his radio crackled to life. "Daniel Jackson, what is your position?"

"We're at the corner of the temple. Sam's pinned down!"

"I will be there momentarily."

Daniel didn't take the time to reply and as he gained the safety of the trees, turned toward the Jaffa advancing on Sam's position and opened fire. It was just enough to draw their attention away from Sam, giving her the opportunity she needed to take more careful aim at the Jaffa and fire, felling them both. She didn't give the act another thought, later she would have time to regret their deaths and her role in killing them. But right now her job was to get her team out of there and safely back to the SGC. They had intel that had to be passed on up the chain of command.

Sam swept her eyes across the open ground between her and Daniel; seeing nothing she ran full out for the trees. Sliding to a stop at the younger man's side, Sam looked up at him. "Thanks. And don't ever disobey one of my orders in the field again, Daniel. Ever."

Daniel dropped his gaze, saying nothing, simply nodding his head in reply. Sam's radio sprang to life. "Colonel Carter, what is your situation?"

"Teal'c, we're just inside the tree line opposite your previous position. We are secure for the moment. What about you?"

"I was forced to move away from the temple to avoid Jaffa patrols. I will rejoin you momentarily."

"Acknowledged. We'll start to head for the 'gate, catch up to us on the way. We'll be on a heading of 226, copy?"

"Copy. Teal'c out."

"Come on, let's get the hell out of here before those guy's buddies show up wondering what happened to them," Sam said tersely, the tension in her voice the only indication of her worry. Waving Daniel to precede her, Sam covered their retreat, looking back behind them every few moments looking for pursuit. At first she saw nothing and she began to relax minutely, praying that the uncanny SG-1 luck held for one more mission.

Sam had just turned her head back toward Daniel when a flash of armor caught her eye; realizing that the Jaffa had followed them into the forest with an unknown size force, Sam didn't take any chances. Doubling her pace she caught up with Daniel quickly and put out a hand to push him from behind just as a staff blast rocked the trees just behind them, nearly knocking them from their feet.

"Move it! Go! Go! Go!" Sam cried, swiveling to return fire. A blast of staff weapon fire arched over her head and she ducked instinctively. Looking behind her Sam was utterly relieved to see Teal'c standing perhaps fifty yards from her position, covering their withdrawal. Surging to her feet she ran toward him, pulling Daniel with her. Racing past Teal'c they beat a hasty retreat, hoping to put as much distance between them and the advancing Jaffa as possible.

Sam could hear Teal'c firing several more blasts before his running feet were right behind them. They ran for all they were worth, knowing that their only hope now would be to make it through the Stargate and home. The last thing Sam wanted to do was attempt to stand and fight. There was no way to know how many Jaffa were chasing them, or what kind of weapons they had with them. For all she knew they were outnumbered by a much larger force who only needed them to slow down even for a moment in order to surround them.

Daniel ran harder than he thought he possibly could, his breath coming in short gasps as he navigated the uneven forest floor. He stumbled slightly, his foot catching on a protruding tree root and would have fallen had it not been for Sam's steadying hand pulling him back upright again.

Finally the trees began to thin and the Stargate peeked from between the trunks. Daniel allowed his pace to slow when they reached the edge of the trees as a high pitched whine reached his ears. He knew that sound, had heard it before, more times than he cared to remember. It was the sound of a death glider beginning a strafing run. He opened his mouth to shout a warning, but was pushed roughly to the ground before he could utter a sound, Teal'c's body landing next to his as the tops of the trees over their heads exploded in a shower of limbs and leaves.

As the firing ceased, Daniel raised his head to look around, seeking out his teammates. Teal'c sat up next to him, raising his staff weapon across his body as he searched the trees and then the skies seeking their enemy. Automatic weapons fire from the clearing drew his attention, pushing himself to his feet Daniel stumbled into the open. Sam was standing just past the edge of the tree line firing her P-90 at the retreating death glider. Her attention focused on her target as it turned for a second pass, Sam hadn't heard the approach of a second glider.

Teal'c raced into the open, raising his staff weapon to fire at the approaching glider even as the pilot opened fire on them, strafing the ground near them with superheated blasts from his canons. The concussion knocked Sam backwards and into the trees, forcing the air from her lungs as she landed painfully at the base of a large evergreen. Daniel saw Sam go down and raced to her side as she was pulling herself upright.

"Sam! You okay?"

"Yeah…" Sam wheezed, attempting to draw in a decent breath. "Fine. Just…got the…breath knocked outta me."

Daniel breathed a sigh of relief, but he knew they were far from safe. They still had to cross the clearing and make it to the DHD to dial home, all before the Jaffa foot patrol and the death gliders returned.

Sam ran a shaking hand through her hair as she attempted to slow her breathing and get herself under control. She still had a responsibility; to her team and to Earth. They needed to get at least one of them through the 'gate and back home with what they knew. She knew that person had to be Daniel. He had understood what they had overheard inside Ba'al's temple, he had a better chance of explaining it to the General and the staff at the SGC. Daniel could get them back inside the temple again when they returned with a strike force to level the facility and could decipher the writings on the temple walls. Daniel was the key.

In the end, it was one of the easiest decisions she had ever made, and one of the hardest. Grief washed over her at the thought of never making it home again, of never seeing Jack again. Just the thought brought hot tears to her eyes, but she roughly pushed them away. She had a duty to perform, and she'd be damned if she wasn't going to carry it out, no matter the personal cost.

"Daniel! I'll stay behind and cover you. I want you to run for the 'gate!"

Daniel's shocked expression would have been comical had the situation not been so dire. "No! Either we all go, or none of us go!"

Teal'c came to kneel at Sam's side. "The patrol was not far behind us and the gliders will be back over this position in moments. We must go now, Colonel Carter."

Sam knew Daniel and Teal'c wouldn't hesitate to stay behind, just as she was willing to do, but this time it was different. This time the fate of the world rested on the knowledge Daniel carried with him. "Teal'c, I'm giving you a direct order. Get yourself and Daniel through that 'gate!"

"Colonel Carter, I do not believe that is a wise course of action."

"Teal'c, please. Daniel and I overheard the Jaffa inside the temple. They have a weapon and they plan to use it against Earth. The SGC must be warned!"

Teal'c's eyes widened at the news, his mouth set in a hard grim line. He knew that in her position as team leader it was up to her to ensure the safety of the members of her team and to ensure the safe delivery of such critical intelligence, but he didn't have to like her decision. The arrival of the Jaffa patrol made further discussion impossible and Sam knew they were wasting precious seconds arguing.

"Daniel, for once in your life, just follow orders!" Sam shouted, the anguish in her voice carrying over the din of the staff fire blasting over their heads.

"Sam, we're not leaving you behind!"

"Daniel, don't argue with me! The only way we are going to have a chance at defeating this damn weapon is if you get back through the 'gate with what we found out!" Sam reached forward and tangled her free hand in Daniel's jacket lapel, pulling him roughly around, forcing him to meet her gaze. "Daniel, I mean it! Move your ass! I'll cover you."

Daniel opened his mouth to protest but stopped short at the look in her eyes. He had seen Sam Carter in many moods and many states, but never before had he seen the fire and determination that now shone brightly in her steely gaze. He nodded mutely, resigned to following her directives, at least for now.

"Ok, ok. We're going. Just don't make me regret this, ok? You'll be just behind us, right? Promise?"

"Yes, I promise. Now go! Go! Before those Jaffa have a chance to swing around and cut you off from the 'gate!"

"Colonel Carter, I will accompany Daniel Jackson to the 'gate and then return to cover your escape."

"Teal'c just get yourselves through! Don't wait for me!"

Teal'c inclined his head in acquiescence. The last thing he wanted to do was leave his commanding officer behind, but he could hardly argue with her reasoning. At least one of them had to report back if they were to have any hope of defending against the coming attack. Pulling Daniel roughly to his feet, they both fled toward the 'gate. They were less than 50 yards from the DHD when the ground suddenly bucked and rolled beneath their feet, knocking them both to their knees. Daniel recovered first, covering the remaining distance to the DHD in record time to begin dialing out. By the time he had punched the seventh symbol to open the wormhole Teal'c was at his side.

Daniel paused to turn back toward Sam's position raising his sidearm to return fire, "Sam, come on! Come on!" he screamed, panic beginning to course through his veins when he realized she was no longer in her sheltered position but had moved out and into the open to give them as much cover from the advancing Jaffa infantry as she was able.

Sam half turned at his shouts, her guard dropping momentarily as she drew a breath to reply, "Daniel, get outta here now!" She turned her attention back to the Jaffa in her sights, squeezing off several bursts from her P-90.

Daniel pursed his lips into a hard, thin line before reluctantly turning back toward the open 'gate and sending through his GDO code. He had just reached the edge of the event horizon when he risked one last look back at where Sam had been standing, fiercely defending their only path of retreat. In that last glance he watched, horrified, as a blast from a nearby Jaffa staff weapon lifted Sam neatly up off her feet and sent her crashing to the ground in a crumpled, tangled heap, the ground where she had stood smoking slightly in her wake.

"No! Sam!" Daniel cried, his voice hoarse with fear. He turned to head back down toward his fallen teammate when the Jaffa still advancing on the 'gate turned their weapons on him and opened fire. He awkwardly ducked the haphazard blast aimed at his head and dropped down to one knee just in front of the 'gate, squeezing off several rounds from his 9mm as he dropped.

Teal'c's warrior heart cried out in agony as he watched as his teammate was felled where she stood. In that split second the choices laid before him seemed impossibly cruel. He could head back down the steps and try to pull Sam to safety, disobeying the last order she had given him, or he could retreat through the 'gate and leave her to almost certain death or capture. That second stretched out before him like a lifetime and he realized that to go back would likely mean death for both of them. To retreat would mean life for him and a possibility that he could return for her. And he would be back for her.

The betrayal of his decision caught in his throat, choking him, but he truly had no other choices. Teal'c gained his feet as the Jaffa continued to advance toward him. Reaching down to pull Daniel up by the back of his vest they stumbled through the 'gate and were swept up and into the cold arms of the wormhole.

Carried along, the trip seemed nearly instantaneous, and as they tumbled through to the other side they became aware of hands and voices as the security forces in the 'gate room advanced toward them slightly, weapons raised in challenge.

Teal'c somehow found his voice and called out a warning. "Close the iris! There were Jaffa right behind us!"

Daniel sat up dazedly and looked back at the 'gate, expecting half a dozen armed Jaffa to come barreling through at any moment. But as the iris slid smoothly closed, he realized there could be no pursuit. The seconds stretched on and still nothing from the 'gate; ten, fifteen, twenty seconds with no tell tale thuds of an impact and he slowly he let out the breath he had been holding as he became aware that they were not going to pursue them.

His shoulders slumped in relief and then tensed again in sickening dread. The Jaffa appeared to be holding the 'gate open on the other side. They were going to prevent them from returning for at least the next 38 minutes by holding the 'gate open. An eternity in which they could do what they liked to Sam or they could be half way across the galaxy with her before they would be able to dial back out and get to her.

Jack had watched the scene unfold from the confines of the control room and had ordered the iris closed once Teal'c had shouted his warning. He had barely acknowledged that Sam hadn't followed them before he headed down the stairs and into the 'gateroom. He was determined to discover how a recon mission could have gone so horribly wrong that they had been pursued back through the 'gate by Jaffa and minus their CO.

"Teal'c, what the hell happened out there!" Jack's strained voice carried through the cavernous room. "Where's Carter? And why the hell isn't that 'gate closing?"

Daniel pulled himself shakily to his feet, his heart still thundering in his ears as he turned to face Jack. What could he say? Before he could form any sort of coherent answer, Jack was spinning on his heel barking orders to the SF's who held defensive positions around the 'gate.

"Lieutenant Jacobs, take your element and stand by this area. Expect hostile forces, they could attempt come through that 'gate at any time and you'd damn well better be ready for them, just in case that iris doesn't hold," Jack didn't pause long enough to hear the 'Yes, sir's' uttered by the moving officers before he turned on his heel and strode toward the remaining members of SG-1.

Daniel stood gaping at the open wormhole. "They're holding it open. Damn them, they're holding it open."

Jack's patience was beginning to wear thin, but he realized that the middle of the 'gateroom was no place for a debriefing. "Briefing room, now."

Jack led the way up the stairs, taking them two at a time. Once they were all inside, he turned to face them again, preferring to stand to one side of the conference table. "Alright, who's holding the 'gate open? Damn it Daniel, what the hell happened?"

"Jack…" Daniel began, but broke off unsure of what to say, his eyes dropping to study his boots. 'Sorry Jack, we got ambushed? Sam ordered me to leave her behind and so like a good little soldier I did? And now it looks like Ba'al's forces have control of the only way back to her?' Probably not the best way to answer any of those questions, Dr Jackson. His gaze drifted up to Jack's face and he took a deep breath before continuing. "It started off well enough. Everything was right where the Tok'ra said it would be. We discovered the ruins not far from the 'gate. What we didn't know until we were inside was that the temple was camouflaging…one of Ba'al's research facilities."

Daniel paused watching Jack's eyes widen in surprise then harden in anger. "Daniel, what happened to Carter?" He asked through clenched teeth. Jack wasn't really sure he wanted to hear the answer to that question, but he had to hear it. Flicking his eyes between Daniel and Teal'c his heart began to sink at the expressions on their faces.

"We were under fire, Jack. She did the best she could. Got us all the way back to the 'gate. We took cover, tried to fight them off. There were too many of them, we didn't stand a chance. There was no way we were going to all make it to the 'gate, Jack. No way."

Jack closed the distance between himself and Daniel in one long stride, bringing their faces within inches of each other. "Daniel, where is she?" He hissed.

Daniel instinctively stepped backwards, attempting to put some distance between them before he drew in a breath to answer. "She ordered us Jack…" he began lamely. It sounded even more pathetic now that he had actually said it out loud. "She ordered us to get back. She covered us while we dialed the 'gate," Daniel paused, that last horrible moment before he stepped through the event horizon flashing before his eyes and he felt a now familiar lump choking him again.

Up until that moment, Teal'c had remained stoically silent, but now he felt the need to report what had happened himself, warrior to warrior. He owed it to her. "General O'Neill, we followed Colonel Carter's orders to return through the Stargate. There was no other way. Had we not, we all would surely have been killed."

Mustering his courage, Daniel looked up and right into Jack's eyes, knowing his emotions were written all over his face. "I tried to go back for her, but there were too many of them. I couldn't get to her. She was hit. She went down, Jack. I didn't see her get back up," Daniel's voice trailed off to barely more than a whisper.

The world seemed to close in around him as Jack struggled to comprehend what he was hearing. His heart rate doubled and his breath came short in his chest, his heart pounding so loud in his ears it drowned out everything else. Carter had been hit? They just left her there to die? They left her! He stood, barely controlled fury causing him to shake slightly as he tried to take it all in.

"You just left her there?" His voice a harsh whisper, full of accusations.

"Jack, we had no choice! We'd _all _be dead right now if I hadn't!" Daniel raged, his blue eyes snapping with anger and remorse.

"You haven't learned a damned thing have you? We don't leave our people behind!"

"If it had been you in her place, you would've done exactly the same thing, Jack! You taught her well."

Teal'c's soft baritone carried through the nearly empty room. "O'Neill, I too left Colonel Carter behind. But Daniel Jackson is correct, we would certainly have died had we stayed. And we had to return, O'Neill. While inside Ba'al's fortress Daniel Jackson and Colonel Carter overheard Ba'al's Jaffa discussing a new weapon they plan to use against Earth. That was why Colonel Carter ordered us to return."

Jack stood rooted to the spot, quietly seething in anger and frustration. Daniel hadn't been wrong, he would have ordered them to do exactly the same thing, especially if the safety of Earth was at stake. But it still didn't make it any easier to hear. Slowly, his tactical mind began to take over, working out the details of what had happened and just how they were going to get back there. The silence stretched on for several moments, until Daniel had begun to fidget uncomfortably.

Jack took a deep breath, attempting to at least project calm as he looked up into each of their faces. "You did the right thing, reporting back here. Carter was right, we needed to know." He turned and paced to the head of the table, pulling out his chair and sinking into it. Daniel and Teal'c followed suit, each taking up a seat.

"Teal'c, where would they take her?"

"Jack, we don't even know if…" Daniel began before he was roughly cut off.

"No, Daniel. She's alive. And until I see a body, we're going to assume as much. Got me?"

Daniel merely nodded in reply. He knew in Jack's mind there would always be a chance, always would be hope. He had seen them come out of situations so dire it seemed as though no one on Earth would survive. But this time, knowing what they had seen on the other side of that 'gate, he wasn't so sure that their luck hadn't finally run out.

"We saw no evidence of a Mothership or Tel'tak, but one may be summoned to take her to Ba'al for interrogation. Or Ba'al may arrive on the planet to question her. Which, we cannot be sure."

Jack winced at the implication, but remained silent. The idea that Sam might suffer the same cruelties he had once experienced at Ba'al's hands left him cold.

"Ok. We need to know everything you know about this weapon. What it does. When and where they intend to use it and anything you can remember about the inside of that temple. I'll be damned if we're going to leave her there one moment longer than necessary."


	7. Chapter Seven

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Seven**

From the moment she pried open her eyes to the dank gloom of the Goa'uld holding cell, Sam knew she was in deep trouble. She had spent the first few moments of consciousness simply attempting to keep the room from spinning crazily. As the dizziness quelled Sam was able to make a cursory sweep of the room and was relieved to find herself alone. She could only hope that meant Teal'c and Daniel had made it through the 'gate and back to the SGC.

_So. Here you are. Alone. Great job, Sam._ She groused silently. Sighing, Sam rolled over onto her side and pushed herself to sit upright, taking inventory of her injuries. All in all she considered herself incredibly lucky; she had a bump on her head she suspected might be a slight concussion and a nasty staff wound on her right calf that while painful, if she could get it treated soon wouldn't cause her any long term difficulties. She stood slowly, allowing her head to slow its incessant throbbing before limping around the perimeter of the room. Roughly square, it offered little in the way of comforts aside from a hard pallet extending from one wall. She could find only one door and no windows, the only illumination came from two small fixtures hung on either side of the door that barely provided enough light to make out the pallet.

Sitting down on the makeshift bed, Sam pulled up the leg of her trousers to get a better look at her leg wound. The edges had been neatly cauterized, so the bleeding had been kept to a minimum, but the open burn was extremely painful and needed to be treated soon. Searching her pockets, Sam found she had little with which to give herself first aid so untucking her shirt and first tearing off one sleeve and then a length from the tail, she fashioned a crude bandage that she hoped would keep the worst of the dirt and debris out of the wound. Infection would set in eventually, she knew, and she had to be on her way out of here before that happened. Otherwise it was unlikely she'd have the strength to escape.

As Sam completed her first aid the door burst inward, a Jaffa bearing Ba'al's mark on his forehead stood in the hallway, his staff weapon clasped in his hands.

"Come."

Sam stood rooted in place, her instincts screaming to fight back, attempt escape. But the more rational side of her mind insisted she bide her time; taking on a Jaffa unarmed and single handed was hardly a wise tactical move. Right now it was all about survival, taking huge risks wouldn't improve her odds of making it out alive.

"Move, Tau'ri!"

Sam did as she was instructed, moving out into the hallway. The Jaffa grabbed at her arm and roughly propelled her down corridor.

"Where are we going?"

"Silence!" The Jaffa shouted, cuffing the side of her head to emphasize his point. Sam whirled to face him, her face set in anger, but she held her tongue. She stared defiantly into the Jaffa's eyes, never blinking or backing down. The Jaffa's gaze skittered away from her face and Sam knew she had won a small but significant victory. But her triumph was short-lived as he grabbed her arm once again and sent her careening down the hallway.

They made several turns, the corridors twisting and turning back on itself several times. As they approached a large entryway, Sam could hear low voices coming from inside but couldn't make out what they were saying. The Jaffa escorting her guided Sam into the room and shoved her toward a low chair at its center.

There were two Jaffa standing near the center of the room who moved to flank her on each side. Sam had read reports about Jaffa interrogation techniques that could break the strongest and best trained of any SGC field personnel. She had been through the survival training at several points during her Air Force career, beginning with her first summer at the Academy. She learned lessons during that training that had stuck with her throughout the subsequent years. Those lessons would now be put to the test.

Her escort spoke first. "Sit, Tau'ri."

Sam turned toward him, her chin raised to look at him directly, her gaze never wavering. Every Air Force Academy cadet was taught the Code of Conduct for captured personnel; that training had been drilled into her over and over that first year and then again during her survival training while in flight school. Almost automatically, the articles of the Code of Conduct flashed through her mind, she knew her duty and what was expected of her as a prisoner. _If I am captured, I will continue to resist by all means available._

"Sit!" The Jaffa bellowed, lashing out with his staff weapon to sweep her feet from under her, collapsing her onto the hard chair. Reigning in her temper, Sam pulled herself upright then pushed herself back to her feet. _I am an American, fighting in the forces which guard my country and our way of life. I am prepared to give my life in their defense._

"You will sit!" The Jaffa to her right swept up his staff weapon into both hands, swinging it in a short arc he brought it around to connect solidly with her midsection, driving the breath from her lungs and folding her legs beneath her, landing her unceremoniously onto the chair again.

Sam sat, doubled over, gasping for air. One lesson the survival instructors had pounded into them over and over again, always know when to resist and when to give in, finding that balance could determine if you lived or died.

"That's better, Tau'ri. Now, you will answer some questions for us." The Jaffa to her left began speaking, by his voice and manner Sam decided he was most likely the one in charge of her interrogation.

Sam raised her head, again looking at her questioner directly, never once showing her fear no matter how deep it ran.

"You have spirit, Tau'ri. You would have made an excellent Jaffa had you been born on Chulak. How many were with you? How many more are still hiding among the shadows on this planet?"

_When questioned, should I become a prisoner of war, I am required to give name, rank, serial number, and date of birth. I will evade answering further questions to the best of my ability._ "Carter, Samantha. Lieutenant Colonel. 43-412-6775-320. 12-29-68." She never saw the blow that knocked her from the seat and onto the floor. Shaking her head to clear the stars that danced in her vision, Sam drew in a deep breath then pulled herself up and retook her seated position in the chair. Her eyes leveled with her questioner, she silently vowed not to give him the satisfaction of seeing her break.

"I will ask you again. How many were with you? What did you see inside this facility? What is the code that will allow us to penetrate your defensive iris?"

_I will make no oral or written statements disloyal to my country and its allies or harmful to their cause._ "Carter, Samantha. Lieutenant Colonel. 43-412…" Sam again found herself staring up at her captors from the floor, the blow this time catching her just under her ear, causing her head to ring painfully. And again, she pulled herself upright, reclaiming her chair, sitting up straight, her hands folded in her lap.

"Make no mistake, Tau'ri, I will kill you if you do not answer. How many were with you? What are the codes to your defensive systems?"

"Carter, Samantha. Lieutenant Colonel. 43-412-6775-320. 12-29-68." Sam tensed for the blow she expected to come and was surprised when the Jaffa held their ground. The questioning went on like that for several more minutes, all revolving around the same things. How many had been with her? What had she seen? What was her GDO code? Each time she gave them the same answers, name, rank serial number and date of birth. Each time tensing, waiting for the blow; and surprised when it didn't come. What was their game? She expected to be physically tortured for the information she had. She hadn't expected that the torture would also include withholding that abuse at times. Waiting, tensed for the blows that never came was almost as bad as receiving them.

The interrogation went on for some time, how long Sam couldn't be sure. For the duration of that time she refused to give them any information; At times the punishment for her refusal to give the Jaffa what they wanted was physical, other times she was left alone. She was never sure which response she would receive.

"You will give us what we desire, Tau'ri. It is only a matter of time. Take her back to the cell. Perhaps if given some time to consider your situation, you will realize you have no other options."

Two of the Jaffa each took one of her arms and drug her roughly to her feet, half walking and half dragging her down the corridors and back to her cell. Sam watched closely as the Jaffa reached out to trigger the door's mechanism to open the cell. It was technology she had seen before and if given enough time she thought maybe she could hot wire it. Once the door had slid fully open, the Jaffa released her arms and brought the flat end of his staff weapon down over her shoulders, sending her sprawling into the room. Sam blinked away the tears the blow had brought to her eyes, but wasted no time pulling herself back upright and regained her feet. _Never let them see weakness. They'll exploit it just as sure as they'll exploit any other opportunities you give them. Don't give them that to work with._

The Jaffa standing at the entrance to her cell snorted in disgust, then activated the door and they both turned and marched down the hallway. Sam listened until she could no longer hear their footfalls before she allowed herself to sink gratefully down onto the cold, hard pallet.

Sighing, she took inventory of herself. All in all, she was relatively pleased that she had come through her first interrogation session with Ba'al's Jaffa in rather good shape. They had stuck to blows that while painful, hadn't done any lasting damage. She was more than slightly surprised that they hadn't taken advantage of her pre-existing wounds. It wasn't like the Jaffa to fail to take advantage of an opportunity like that; it didn't bode well for future sessions with her captors.

As she sat attempting to regain some of her strength, Sam realized that she hadn't eaten or had anything to drink for several hours now. She would need something soon if she were to hold out for long under the Jaffa questioning, but she didn't hold out much hope that the Jaffa would be forthcoming with either food or water. That realization spurred Sam to climb wearily to her feet and moved to inspect the wall opposite the keypad that activated her door. If she could just rig the door to open, even if it was just a little, she could hopefully force the door open far enough to allow her to escape.

Sam thought back to her survival training from the Academy, somewhat surprised at how much she still remembered from those days of drilling the Articles of the Code of Conduct as a Doolie during her first year there. _If I am captured I will continue to resist by all means available. I will make every effort to escape and aid others to escape. I will accept neither parole nor special favors from the enemy. _Shaking her head slightly at the bit of nostalgic reminiscing, Sam set to work on the wall.

She spent several long minutes inspecting the wall and was unsuccessful in finding any easy access to the back side of the keypad, not that she expected the Goa'uld to be that forthcoming. Deciding that she wasn't going to gain anything by continuing to search for access that most likely didn't exist, Sam set about searching for anything she could use to pry at the wall to fashion her own access. Taking stock of her room, she found nothing that would be useful so Sam turned her attention to her pockets. The Jaffa had been most thorough during her capture, removing everything she had been carrying with her. All she had was her clothing and boots, thankfully that still included her belt.

_Well, you didn't spend all those hours watching MacGyver for nothing. Figure it out, girl. Get yourself outta here. This won't be the first time you've pried open a control panel with your belt buckle._

Sam sighed softly, remembering that mission that had nearly cost them Teal'c, if not in body then in mind. Thankfully that time she'd had her Dad, Daniel and Jack with her. Now she had only herself to rely upon. Pulling her belt free of its loops, Sam went to work on the small seam she could feel between the wall plates that, as near as she could tell, should be at the opposite side of the control panel that opened the cell. Working persistently, Sam slowly opened the seam, widening it until she could fit the entire edge of her buckle into it and pry upwards giving herself just enough room to fit her fingers beneath the panel and pull. It came free inch by inch until finally she felt something give way and the panel swung open, hinged on points hidden within the wall.

Peering inside, the dim light didn't allow her to see too far into the wall, but Sam could make out a small latching mechanism that had given way as she had pried on it. Fingering the latch, she hoped it would hold the panel closed well enough that her captors wouldn't notice her tampering. Pulling the panel open fully, Sam tried to focus on what was behind it. The fact that the panel had a latch and was hinged gave her hope that it was some sort of hidden maintenance access panel that would allow her to override the mechanism for the door.

Gingerly feeling inside, Sam could identify the back sides of the control crystals by touch. After failing to hotwire the door during that fateful mission that took them up against Apophis and the Replicators, Sam had set about learning everything she could about the doors and how they worked, pulling on the Tok'ra specs for Goa'uld ships of all types. She only hoped that their land bases used the same or similar technology.

Feeling her way through the control panel, Sam carefully pried and manipulated the crystals within her grasp, closing her eyes in concentration as she pictured the schematics in her mind's eye and worked from that memory. Slowly she pulled loose the key crystal, the master control that regulated the power flow through the latching mechanism. She then reinserted the crystal into an open maintenance slot, essentially overriding the power flow and enabling the door's mechanism.

Sam worked steadily for an hour before her vision began to blur and the muscles in her arms began to cramp painfully. Sam realized she had been awake and on her feet for well over 24 hours and reluctantly acknowledged that she needed to get some sleep and soon, since she had no way of knowing how long the Jaffa would leave her in her cell before retrieving her for another round of interrogation. Pulling her hands out of the wall she inspected her work. What she had done so far wouldn't affect the mechanism's functioning and she hoped wouldn't be visible to them if they entered her cell. Pushing the access panel closed firmly until it was flush against the wall Sam pulled her hands away and was pleased when it appeared to hold in place.

Sam dusted her hands off on her trousers and massaged her aching arms and shoulders as she walked across the bare metal floor to sink gratefully down on the small pallet. Pulling off her jacket and draping it over her arms and shoulders Sam pillowed her head on her arm and sank into a restless sleep.

TBC….


	8. Chapter Eight

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Eight**

The nervous energy that he often felt before a mission seemed to multiply ten fold until the tingling crawling up his spine sent Jack out of his office to pace in front of the briefing room windows. It had been nearly 12 hours since Daniel and Teal'c had returned through the 'gate; 12 hours since he had been given the terrifying news that Sam was now in the hands of Ba'al and his Jaffa. His first instinct had been to grab a vest, a P-90 and dive back through the 'gate after her, but the tactician in him knew that was far from the ideal course of action. Jack's heart, however, cried out in frustration and grief.

He had thought that the quiet and solitude of his office would allow him to concentrate on the task at hand, mainly to pull Sam out of that god forsaken hell hole she was in, but it hadn't quite worked out that way. Rather than calming him, his mind seemed to race at ever increasing speeds, conjuring for him images of Sam at Ba'al's mercy, crying out to him, begging him to help her, to rescue her. Digging his palms into his eyes, Jack's effort to drive the images from his mind met with little success and so he reviewed their battle plans again, looking for any weaknesses he hadn't caught before.

Just two hours earlier he had called a briefing of the remaining members of SG-1 along with Colonel Reynolds and the members of SG-3. Long relied upon for their search and rescue operations, the SG-3 Marines had earned a well deserved reputation amongst the other SG teams that no one would ever be left behind in enemy hands. So far, they had yet to fail in that mission, even if they had to bring back only the bodies of those who had been lost.

In the briefing Teal'c had described the layout of Ba'al's temple and the defenses they had encountered outside while Daniel had outlined the inside of the structure and where he and Sam had first encountered the Jaffa.

"Well, General, the way I see it we have two options," Reynolds began. "First we could put together a force of at least four SG teams supported with RPG's, M-60's, and enough C-4 to blow a hole in the side of that temple wide enough to fit an Abrams through."

"What're the chances Sam would get blown up right along with the Jaffa?" Daniel interrupted hotly.

"Since we don't know her precise location, those odds would be higher than I'm comfortable with, Doctor Jackson. Which is why I think option two is a more viable plan. We go in, just SG-1 and SG-3. Surgical strike team small enough to get inside the temple without being detected. We then use Doctor Jackson's knowledge of Goa'uld to pin point Colonel Carter's location, extract her, make it back to the 'gate before we're discovered."

Jack looked up from his notes. "And exactly what're the chances of us getting in and out without detection?"

"Slim, General. But the odds of getting Colonel Carter out alive are much better with option two."

Jack nodded solemnly, having already reached that conclusion himself, but it was always prudent to listen to other options. "Okay, we go in with a small team, SG-3, Daniel and Teal'c. If it all goes to hell and back and you're discovered, leave one man at the 'gate and to report back. If we need to, we'll mobilize a larger SG team force to come pull all your asses out of there."

Daniel's eyebrows raised in surprise, but he said nothing. He had expected Jack to accompany them on this mission and to hear his name conspicuously missing from the mission roster was surprising to say the least. He could only assume that Jack had his reasons for staying behind, he only hoped they were the right ones.

General O'Neill surveyed the faces of the men surrounding the table. He knew they would all go anywhere he ordered them, but this mission seemed to go above and beyond their normal duties and he intended to give them all an option to get out, if they wanted it. "This isn't going to be your usual search and rescue, gentlemen. As such, I'm not going to order any of you to be a part of this team. This will be an all volunteer operation, so anyone who wants out, speak up now."

In the silence that ensued, only the breathing of those in the room could be heard before Colonel Reynolds drew a breath to speak. "Sir, I believe I speak for all here when I say that I'll be damned if I'm going to back out of this one. Colonel Carter has saved our collective asses more than once and it's about time we returned the favor. Sir."

Jack nodded then pressed his hands flat on the table and pushed himself to his feet, the others quickly following suit.

"Get some sleep. I know Daniel and Teal'c have been at it for over 20 hours now and SG-3 just got back from a mission this morning. The last thing we need is you slowing down or screwing up because of fatigue. 6 hours sleep minimum, be back here ready to ship out at 0430. Dismissed."

Jack now grudgingly admitted he needed to take his own advice and try to get some sleep since he was damn sure he wouldn't sleep much at all once the mission was underway. Sighing deeply and shoving his hands deep into his pockets he headed toward his quarters just down the corridor from the control room. Opening the door he clicked on the small light next to his bed and sank down onto it wearily, bending down to unlace his boots. He had gotten one boot off when he heard a soft knock on his door. Wincing and scrubbing a hand over his face and up through his hair he stood and crossed the room to answer it.

Pulling the door open he was startled to see Colonel Reynolds standing in the corridor looking slightly uncomfortable. "Reynolds? Shouldn't you be getting some sleep right now, Colonel?"

"Yes, sir. But I needed to speak with you. Would you mind if I came in?"

Surprised but also intrigued, Jack gestured the Marine in waving him toward a chair at the corner of the room. "What can I do for you?"

The Colonel bypassed the offered chair, preferring to stand with his hands clasped behind his back. He shifted his feet slightly, an indication of just how nervous the usually spit and polish Marine was at the moment. Jack chose to sit on the edge of his bunk, eyeing his officer curiously. In the end, Reynolds decided to simply spit out what was on his mind, figuring at worst the General would simply chew him out and throw him out of his quarters.

"Sir, may I ask why you didn't assign yourself to this mission?"

Jack was stunned at the question. Certainly he wanted with all his heart and soul to lead this mission, but at the same time he knew that he had a duty to fulfill at the SGC and Generals rarely led rescue missions into enemy territory. Then there was the problem of favoritism. How could he, in good conscience, go on this mission when he didn't head up every other rescue mission for missing SGC team members? He had spent so many years living by the regulations that the idea of showing any sort of favoritism for Sam because of his personal feelings for her had rankled him. "Colonel, I…um…"

"General, we all know your skills in the field and it seems to me that with your intimate knowledge of our enemy in this case that your presence would be key to our success."

"Colonel, I think you know there's more to it than that."

"Yes, sir, I do. But if I might speak freely sir?"

"By all means."

"That's bullshit. Sir."

Jacks eyebrows raised and he smirked slightly. "Ya think so, Colonel?"

"Yes, sir, I do. Your relationship with Colonel Carter is of course your own business, sir. But I can't think of anyone more motivated than you to complete this mission and get everyone home alive and well." Reynolds took a step closer, relaxing his shoulders and allowing his arms to drop to his sides. "Sir, no one will think any less of you for wanting to lead this mission yourself. No one."

Jack sighed softly before rising to his feet. "I appreciate your input, John. Really. Thank you."

"Yes, sir. Good night, General."

As the door closed quietly behind him, Reynolds paused in the hallway, knowing that his message had been received, loud and clear.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Sam felt as though she had barely closed her eyes when she felt herself being pulled roughly to her feet and propelled out into the corridor. Stumbling slightly as her sleep muddied brain attempted to catch up with her feet, Sam limped along the hall, prodded from behind by two impatient Jaffa.

Entering the room she had been held in the day prior, Sam recognized her interrogators and resigned herself to another painful and difficult session with them. Motioning to the chair placed in the middle of the room, Sam was herded toward it much less gently than she had been before. She wasn't given the option to stand this time, but was struck at the knees from behind, dumping her on her stomach on top of the chair bottom.

"Sit, Tau'ri!"

Clamping down her jaw on the wave of pain and nausea that threatened to overwhelm her, Sam shakily pushed herself upright to stand with her feet planted far enough apart to give her the balance she needed should they try that maneuver again. She then turned toward her jailers and keeping her gaze firmly on theirs, stood for a moment toe to toe with them. The act of defiance was not unrewarded as the Jaffa put his staff weapon to good use and brought the flat end hard against her wounded calf. Sam was only partially successful at muffling her cry of pain as she was dumped again into the chair.

_Okay, so, no more Mister Nice Jaffa._

"You were less than accommodating before. We will not be as patient today, Tau'ri."

"Yeah, I didn't figure you would be," Sam retorted sarcastically. The Jaffa to her left pulled back his hand and sent it crashing into her mouth, drawing blood. Sam spat the blood pooling in her mouth at his feet and pulled herself upright again, sitting ramrod straight, her hands folded neatly in her lap. Her smoldering gaze never once leaving her interrogator's face.

"Insolence such as that will not be tolerated, Tau'ri. You would do well to remember that. Now, how many others were with you? Where are they now?"

"Carter, Samantha. Lieutenant Colo…" Sam had been tensed, ready for the blow, but the ferocity of the attack took her by surprise and dumped her unceremoniously on the deck at the Jaffa's feet. Wiping the blood from her already bruised mouth, Sam picked herself up as slowly as she could, attempting to give herself as much time as possible before they set to work on her again. Sitting up straight once again, she met the eyes of her interrogators, refusing to allow them the satisfaction of seeing her break. _Carters don't cry Sam. Carters don't give up. Carters do their duty, always._

"Where are your companions? You accomplish nothing by refusing to answer, Tau'ri. We will find them, eventually. This only serves to prolong your agony."

Sam met the Jaffa's gaze, pursing her lips into a thin hard line.

"Where are they? What are your numbers?" The Jaffa's demeanor had become more and more impatient as the questions were fired from his mouth, his face contorting in rage at her silence. As he continued to thunder at her, Sam held her ground, choosing to answer with her silence until finally his temper snapped.

"My Lord requires your answers, Tau'ri! I will not fail to acquire them from you!" Raising his hand, Sam turned her head away from the expected blow only to have her head forced back toward him by the Jaffa at her side.

Sam wasn't sure later how long he had railed on her weakening body, knowing that she was likely seriously injured and realizing her miscalculation of her adversary much too late. But if he beat her to death there in that dank room at least she would be sure she hadn't betrayed her country or her oath. She was certain that at the end they had been forced to hold her upright while he took out his frustrations on her already battered body until finally his temper had cooled and he had ordered them to return her to the small dark cell.

Wheezing with pain that shot through her with every breath, Sam wasn't sure just how much damage had been done. She could feel the swelling around her eyes and mouth, the bruised flesh surely turning spectacular shades already. Her calf throbbed painfully, the heat radiating from the wound indicating that the infection she had feared was now a reality.

She lay on the cool floor, allowing the cold to sooth some of the worst of the aches before she marshaled her strength and pushed herself up to sit against the wall. Her body felt as though she had just gone 10 rounds with Teal'c, and most certainly had lost. Rolling over onto her hands and knees, Sam used the wall to pull herself up to her feet, the abused muscles of her stomach groaning in protest. If there was something seriously busted up inside her, she wouldn't have time to worry about another session with her captors. She had to get the door open and get out of there. Now.

Pulling open the panel she had worked on the day before, Sam set her mind to the task, tuning out any physical pain she was experiencing and focusing solely on the job at hand. _Survival, that's the name of the game. If you believe you'll survive, you'll find a way. Never stop believing._ Pulling and tugging at the crystals by touch alone after nearly an hour of painstaking work Sam finally slid the final crystal home and heard the distinctive snick of the latching mechanism releasing and the hiss of the door as it slid open.

Holding her breath and tensing for the surge of Jaffa guards she was sure was headed into her cell at any moment, Sam was shocked when it didn't materialize and peered out into the corridor only to find it empty. _Where the hell did everyone go?_ Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, Sam closed her eyes in relief and edged out of the door.

_Ok Carter, you're out. Now what?_ She looked both ways before leaning against the doorway briefly as a wave of dizziness threatened to swamp her. Time was of the essence and Sam knew her time was short, and growing shorter every moment. She started off toward the right, praying that she was headed in the direction of an exit, any exit. All she knew was that when they came for her they always headed down the left corridor, and that way only held pain and torture.

Moving as quickly as her injured leg would allow, Sam made her way past several cross corridors. Had she been aboard a Mothership or Tel'tak the layout would have followed a familiar pattern she had committed to memory years earlier. She could only hope that the seemingly familiar landmarks inside the temple followed a similar floor plan.

Sam had been moving for nearly 5 minutes when the sound of booted feet reached her ears. Flattening herself against the wall she waited, listening intently. The footsteps echoed in the empty hallway, but seemed to be drawing nearer to her position. Seeking refuge of any kind, Sam spotted a nearby doorway and quickly keyed the sequence of symbols that would allow her entry.

As the door hissed open, Sam slipped inside and quickly keyed it closed again, praying that she wouldn't run into something worse inside. The room was dimly lit and seemed to be some sort of storage facility. Sam took a moment to survey her surroundings to be sure she was alone before turning her attention to the nearing sounds of Jaffa armored feet. As they drew nearer and seemed to slow she sucked in a nervous breath, holding it as the sounds slowed but did not stop, finally receding down the corridor. Breathing an intense sigh of relief, Sam was about to open the door again when a familiar shape caught her eye and she turned in surprise.

There, atop a rack holding what appeared to be spare Jaffa armor lay her SGC vest and P-90. _What is it they say, better lucky than good? Damned if they aren't right._ Snagging the vest and slipping into it, Sam checked the pockets for her survival gear and spare magazines for her weapon. The Jaffa rarely allowed any usable material to slip through their fingers and this time had kept most of her gear together and intact. A mistake she was surprised they had made.

Picking up her weapon, Sam cleared the chamber and checked the clip and finding it still half full slapped it back home, locking and loading it. Searching for her radio, she was disappointed to find it missing, but would take what she could get; in this case a weapon that may well get her out of the temple and back to the 'gate.

Suddenly feeling much better about her chances of getting off this rock alive, Sam silently sent out a thanks to whoever was looking out for her and paused to take a couple of deep, steadying breaths to calm her shaking limbs before heading back out into the corridor. Resuming her original path, Sam worked her way methodically down the hallway, knowing that at any moment another Jaffa patrol could be around the next turn and knowing that she would have to use deadly force to get past them or risk being sent back into the arms of her torturers. That was something she vowed would not happen again; should it come down to it, she would take as many of them with her as she could, but Sam knew she wouldn't allow herself to be take alive again.

Sam crossed over another cross corridor that this time was labeled with one of the few symbols she recognized, "air lock". Praying that the symbol on a land based facility would also mean "exit", Sam detoured in its direction, finding herself in a hallway that looked vaguely familiar from her trip into the structure with Daniel. About halfway down the corridor Sam found a doorway similarly labeled with the characters for an air lock. Taking a moment to settle herself, Sam repositioned her weapon so that she could aim it out the doorway, just in case the Jaffa had decided to place guards outside the structure after SG-1 had been able to gain entrance through it.

Pressing the symbols in sequence, Sam paused over the last key and taking in one last deep breath punched it. As the door slid open, Sam cautiously poked her head out into the still morning air. The sun was just rising above the tree line, casting enough light over the forest to allow her to make out the surroundings. Crouching low, Sam eased past the doorframe and out of the temple, her eyes and ears trained for any signs that she had been detected. When she neither saw nor heard anything, Sam moved the rest of the way out the door and after a cautious breath, made for the trees and the safety that could be found in their covering depths.

Breathing heavily from even the small amount of exertion, Sam paused several feet into the tree line to glance back over her shoulder. She as yet couldn't see any sort of pursuit, but knew that one would not be far behind. Marshalling her strength, Sam pushed off from the tree she had leaned against and moved further into the forest, praying she could reach the 'gate before the Jaffa reached her.

TBC….


	9. Chapter Nine

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Nine**

The mood in the 'gateroom was somber and tense. It wasn't the first time the SGC had sent out a search and rescue mission, and it certainly wouldn't be the last, and the men and women geared up and ready to depart took their duty to go through the 'gate into hostile territory to bring home an SG team member very seriously. There was no chatter, no jokes or laughter, only steely eyed looks that spoke of their determination and resolve.

The mood became noticeably more charged when General O'Neill, fully outfitted and armed with his own P-90, entered the room. Facing his team, he met their eyes one at a time.

"As of now I'm assuming command of this mission. This is no reflection on Colonel Reynolds, but as some of you may not know, I was held in one of Ba'al's prisons once and escaped. As the Colonel pointed out to me I'm more likely to be able to guide you all through this mission to a successful outcome. And we will have a successful outcome, understood?"

A resounding "Yes, Sir!" sounded through the cavernous room.

"Alright then, let's go. Sergeant Harriman, dial the 'gate," Jack ordered. Turning to face the 'gate as it began to spin and each chevron lit in succession, Jack attempted to reign in his emotions. He knew he could trust the members of his team, knew he could trust them with his life. But this wasn't just his life, it was Sam's, and that upped the ante significantly. Jack had spent the better part of the night attempting to sleep, but every time he had closed his eyes his imagination had taken over until he couldn't bear the image of Sam, bound to the gravity wall as he had been, bleeding from dozens of knife wounds or burned horribly by acid.

Squeezing his eyes tightly closed as he listened to the final chevrons locking into place, Jack banished those images from his mind. Dwelling on them wouldn't help him, and most definitely wouldn't help Sam. Finding her, getting her home, that was his sole mission now. After that, he'd deal with the aftermath. _Just hang on, Sam. Hang on. We're coming for you._

The 'gate opened with its customary kawhoosh and without hesitation Jack stepped up onto the ramp and headed toward the event horizon. Stepping out on the other side of the wormhole, Jack methodically scanned the surrounding meadow and tree line, searching for any welcoming party that may be waiting for them. Satisfied that for the moment they weren't about to be attacked by a Jaffa patrol, Jack walked down the stone steps to take up a position to the left of the 'gate.

Sinking down to one knee, Jack covered the area as the remaining members of his team exited the 'gate and took up defensive positions of their own. Out of habit, Teal'c knelt at Jack's side, the position he had taken on so many missions before. Catching the General's eye, the former First Prime nodded once and then moved off toward the trees, leading the way toward the temple.

Using hand signals, Jack motioned to the rest of the strike team and they fanned out into a wedge formation leaving Jack and Daniel near the center. They traveled silently through the trees for several minutes when Teal'c raised his hand to call a halt. The team immediately dropped into a defensive perimeter, each member taking a position to keep their backs to each other, their weapons trained outward on the surrounding forest. Jack dropped as well, and signaling to Daniel to stay put, made his way to Teal'c's side.

Getting down on one knee Jack scanned the trees, seeing nothing he turned to raise an eyebrow in question. Teal'c motioned toward his ears then off to his left. He had heard something moving off in that direction, but couldn't be sure who or what it was. Jack nodded once, then motioned for Reynolds to move up to his position.

Keeping his voice low, Jack issued his orders. "Reynolds, take your squad and head back the way we came. Try to circle around behind whoever's out there. Teal'c, Daniel, and I will move on ahead and take them from the other side. Understood?"

"Roger that, sir," Colonel Reynolds replied, then turned and signaled his team to head back in the direction of the gate.

Motioning toward Daniel, Jack followed Teal'c as they set off again. Moving as silently as possible, they stuck together until they were within several hundred yards of the area where Teal'c had narrowed down the sounds he had heard before Jack called another stop.

Unable to see any Jaffa nearby, Jack risked whispering a few final instructions. "Teal'c, you take the right. Watch out for Reynolds' patrol, we don't want them blasting away at you thinking you're Ba'al's Jaffa. Danny and I will head to the left. Keep your distance Daniel. I don't want them to catch us all bunched up in a neat little package."

Receiving nods of assent from both men, they moved out in their assigned directions, ready to take on whatever lay in front of them. Jack prayed it was Ba'al's Jaffa. Ever since he learned of Sam's capture, the desire to take out some retribution on Ba'al had been nearly overwhelming. Now that he was actually out here his trigger finger was itching, even if all he could do is take out a few of Ba'al's Jaffa.

Jack could no longer hear Teal'c, but knew instinctively where he was. Keeping Daniel in sight, he moved as quickly as he was able, anticipation coiling in his gut like a cobra ready to strike.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Sam was hidden in the underbrush, the sound of booted Jaffa feet seemingly all around her position. Her stamina had given out early into her flight through the trees and she now sat, concealed as completely as possible, waiting for the hunters to find her. And they would find her, of that she was certain. It was just a matter of time. The clank of the Jaffa armor began to fade and Sam let out a shaking breath, lowering her weapon to rest on her legs. She knew she couldn't stay hidden forever, but could only hope that if she could hold out until darkness fell, she might be able to make her way to the 'gate cloaked from the eyes of her pursuers.

Her heart racing, blood pounding in her ears, Sam consciously tried to calm herself. Keeping her weapon at the ready, she took a moment to cover herself more completely. Camouflaging her position with what was available, Sam settled back down, grasping her weapon with both hands ready to swing it up and into position with as little wasted motion as possible. She could feel the fever running through her body, still centered on the wound in her calf, but the chills she had felt previously had become a flame that seemed to fire her from within. Sam wasn't sure she was going to have the energy to make it to the 'gate if she waited much longer, but getting captured by the Jaffa if she attempted to move during the daylight wasn't any better.

The stillness was suddenly broken once again, only this time the booted feet were much closer than before. Tensing, Sam raised her weapon slightly, gently flicking off the safety as she prepared to defend her position. The Jaffa slowly moved toward her, their precise movements and scanning eyes sure to locate her position in a matter of moments. Sam knew if she were to have any chance of surviving the next few minutes, she needed to act fast and fire first.

Sam suddenly burst from her cover, squeezing off several bursts from her weapon before the Jaffa had time to react. Swinging it around, Sam took down three of the four Jaffa in the first pass before turning it on the last man standing. She realized almost too late that she wouldn't have time to get off a round and brought up her P-90 to parry the staff weapon that was arching toward her unprotected head. The shock of the impact against her arms jarred her very bones, but Sam gritted her teeth and forced herself to shove back against it, staggering the Jaffa slightly as she half rose to her knees and brought her weapon back down into firing position.

Sam squeezed the trigger once, the round catching the Jaffa in the center of his body and sending him flying back through the thick brush. Shaking now as much from the adrenaline as from the fever, Sam pushed herself unsteadily to her feet and checked her ammunition before turning to run in the direction of the 'gate. The sounds of her weapons fire were sure to bring other Jaffa patrols down on her and Sam pushed herself to run harder that she thought possible.

Past her limits of endurance; and still she ran on, crashing through the brush and clinging branches that ripped at her hair and clothing. Finally, with nothing left but sheer raw will, Sam dropped, spent, to the forest floor and sat panting, then gathering herself she searched again for a defensible position from which she might hold up for a few minutes before continuing her flight.

Finding a towering tree a few feet from where she now sat, its trunk at least four feet wide at the base, Sam crawled over to sit under its branches. She had only been seated for a few precious moments when the sound of booted feet through the underbrush had her surging back to her feet and bringing her weapon back up. Eyes stinging from the salty sweat that had dripped down into them, Sam blinked to clear them as she searched frantically for the pursuit she was sure had already discovered her position.

The first glimpse of her pursuer was a bit of dappled sunlight glinting off a golden emblem that adorned his forehead and Sam nearly squeezed the trigger an instant before she caught herself as the rest of his face and body slowly came into focus.

"Teal'c?" Sam whispered, disbelief coloring her voice.

"Colonel Carter. It is I."

Sam sagged in relief, her weapon slowly lowering toward the leaf strewn ground. The adrenaline leaching from her muscles, her heart rate began to slow its thunderous tattoo. "Thank God. Thank God." She breathed as her legs suddenly threatened to give out beneath her and she pulled one hand away from her weapon to grasp the nearest tree, using its solid bulk to steady herself. Teal'c was at her side in an instant, his arm winding around her waist and easing her down to sit at the base of the tree. Lowering himself to one knee, he reached up to key his radio twice, signaling the rest of the team.

Hearing an answering click, Teal'c spoke softly into the microphone. "O'Neill, I have Colonel Carter."

The response was nearly immediate. "We're on our way."

Sam allowed the tension in her arms and shoulders to slowly ebb, only to be replaced by a shaking that she couldn't seem to control. Teeth chattering in response, she could feel the exhaustion she had valiantly held at bay slowly steal up to sap her strength, leaving her pale and weak. She became aware of the steady beat of booted feet coming up through the trees behind them, and her heart rate picked up once again as she shakily raised her weapon to meet what she was sure to be a renewed Jaffa attack.

Daniel and Jack drew to a halt just in front of them, surprised to find themselves staring down the barrel of Sam's P-90. Teal'c raised his hand to gently press down on Sam's weapon, lowering it away from their teammates. Recognition slowly dawned on Sam's face and relief passed through her, renewing the tremors that now shook her entire body. She was so exhausted, it hadn't even occurred to her to question why Jack was off planet leading a rescue mission.

"Carter? You okay?" Jack asked uncertainly, dropping to one knee at her side.

Sam found that she didn't have the energy to speak and simply nodded in reply, her fingers curling and uncurling reflexively around the pistol grip of her weapon. The pain in her leg that had been barely manageable now flared to an all out assault on her. She could feel the heat radiating from the cauterized staff wound and she was certain that the infection was spreading. Beads of sweat rolled down the sides of her face at the same time chills coursed through her, raising the hairs on her arms in response.

Teal'c pulled the weapon from her restless fingers and set it aside. "O'Neill, we should not stay here. The Jaffa are most certainly patrolling these woods and will locate our position soon."

"Yeah, right," Jack replied before reaching for his radio. "Reynolds, this is O'Neill, come in."

"Reynolds here, sir, go ahead."

"We've got Carter. Head back toward the 'gate, tell your men there if we're not there in 15, send the cavalry to come find us. We're about 1 klic south of the 'gate now."

"Copy that, sir. We'll keep the light on."

Jack pushed himself up, reaching a hand down to help Sam up. When she didn't make any attempt to stand, he bent down to gently take her arm and draw her to her feet. She swayed unsteadily and he tightened his grip on her arm, sure she was headed right back down again. Her silence up until now had unnerved him and to see her barely able to stand quite frankly scared the hell out of him. But there wasn't time to dwell on it. They needed to get her home.

"Carter, you gonna be able to make it?"

Sam took a couple of slow, deep breaths before finding the strength to answer. "Yessir. I'll be fine."

Jack nodded, but didn't release his hold on Sam's arm. She sure as hell didn't look fine and he was determined to give her as much support as she needed to get back to the 'gate in one piece.

"Alright, kids, let's get home. Teal'c, take point. Daniel, you watch our six."

Dropping easily into their assigned roles, they moved off as silently and quickly as possible toward the waiting Stargate and the SGC beyond. Jack took up position at Sam's elbow, lessening his grip on her arm, but not letting it go completely.

They had been moving for barely five minutes before Sam slowed perceptibly, her steps shuffling in the dirt and undergrowth. Jack quickly adjusted his pace to her slower strides, tightening his grip on her.

"Whoa," Sam wheezed, bringing a shaking hand up to cover her face as she slowly came to a halt, her feet seemingly no longer willing to continue their flight through the trees.

"Carter? Hey, you okay?" God, he seemed to be asking her that a lot lately. When an answer wasn't immediately forthcoming, Jack turned toward the head of their little column. "Teal'c, hold up a minute."

The former First Prime stopped and turned back, his eyes restlessly scanning the surrounding trees for any signs of pursuit. Daniel took a couple of steps to stand just behind Jack and Sam, his eyes back down the path they had traveled, his weapon at the ready.

"Dizzy, sir," Sam gasped as she continued to breathe deeply, furiously attempting to keep the world from spinning. But rather than slow it's sickening pace, her vision began to tunnel rapidly.

"Ah…sir…?"

Sam suddenly slumped against Jack's side as her consciousness fled and her legs gave way beneath her. Jack had just enough time to pull her arm over his shoulders as she collapsed into him, her body hanging limply across his. He staggered sideways slightly as he attempted to support her sagging form.

"Damn it. Daniel, get over here."

The archaeologist moved quickly, allowing his P-90 to dangle loosely from his harness, Daniel supported Sam's head and shoulders as he and Jack together gently lowered her to the forest floor. Daniel was shocked at the heat he could feel emanating from his teammate as he swiftly searched for a pulse. It took several long moments before he could finally feel the weak beat thrumming beneath his fingertips. He pulled his hand up toward her mouth and nose, gratified to feel a feather light breath on his skin.

Breathing a sigh of relief he looked up into Jack's worried eyes. "She's breathing and she's got a pulse, but it's weak and she's burning up, Jack. We've got to get her to the infirmary. Now."

Jack pressed his lips into a thin, hard line. _Damn._ "Teal'c stay on point. Daniel, help me get her up. We've gotta get outta here. Those Jaffa are gonna be on our asses any minute."

Each taking an arm, they pulled Sam up between them. Looping a hand through her belt, Jack steered them down the path and toward the waiting 'gate. Moving as quickly as they could, considering their burden, they reached the edge of the clearing just as Colonel Reynolds was ordering his team to set off to look for them.

They had barely stepped past the cover of the trees when the world seemed to erupt around them. Several Jaffa came spilling out of the trees, firing their staff weapons as they ran. Jack didn't need to see them to know the Jaffa were rapidly gaining on them and he put all his strength into quickening his pace. Daniel picked up his pace as well, breathing heavily from the exertion he focused solely on his goal, getting Sam to the 'gate and home. He had left her behind once before, he'd be damned if he was going to do it again.

Teal'c whirled as he heard the first tell tale blasts from the staff weapons and brought his own weapon around to fire into the advancing Jaffa. He was not more than 10 feet in front of Jack and Daniel, but it was enough to allow him to give them adequate cover from their pursuers.

Jack never slowed, taking in a deep breath he shouted to the Marines stationed at the steps leading up to the Stargate. "Reynolds! Get that damn 'gate open!"

The Marine waved to his man standing at the DHD who immediately began dialing home. "Connors, Evans, fan out! Covering fire!"

Jack had never been so happy to hear the distinct kawhoosh of a forming wormhole in all his life. Reynolds lowered his weapon momentarily to send the Code Red GDO code, alerting those on the other side that they were coming in hot and with casualties.

Staff blasts continued to strike all around them as Jack and Daniel drug Sam up the stone steps and through the event horizon into the welcoming arms of the wormhole beyond.

Stumbling to a halt upon exiting the wormhole, Daniel and Jack fought for balance as they gently lowered Sam's limp body to the cold metal ramp. Before Jack could draw a breath to speak, Sergeant Harriman's voice burst through the loudspeakers.

"Medical team is on the way, General. Should be here momentarily."

Jack nodded before turning his attention to Sam's prone form, lying unmoving at his feet. "Daniel?"

The archaeologist raised his eyes to Jack's briefly before answering. "I don't know, Jack. I just don't know," he replied solemnly. Skinned knees and paper cuts he could deal with, but Daniel was well out of his depth here, and he knew it. Not for the first time in the past year, Daniel fervently wished Janet was still alive; not that he didn't think Doctor Brightman wasn't a capable physician, but no one held his trust in the way Janet had. Especially where the health and well being of his friends was concerned.

The remaining members of the rescue team slipped through the 'gate as the doors to the 'gateroom burst open to admit Doctor Brightman and her team. Well trained and, unfortunately, well versed in dealing with injured SG Team members, they wasted no time breaking out their equipment and getting to work. Teal'c and the SG-3 Marines filed silently past the med techs, but not without several sidelong glances at the officer lying prone on the ramp. They had done their jobs, and done them well, they only prayed now that they had been in time.

Teal'c paused at the base of the ramp, looking back over his shoulder. Colonel Carter was an exceptional warrior, someone he genuinely respected and knowing what she had likely endured in the day she had been in Ba'al's clutches saddened him. Risking a glance at the General, the Jaffa watched as literally before his eyes he seemed to pull on the mantel of command, leaving a grieving lover behind. _She does not deserve this_, he thought,_ neither of them did._

Doctor Brightman knelt down on the ramp, reaching out to grasp Sam's wrist she measured her pulse with a practiced touch, alarmed at the rapid beats she felt thrumming beneath the cold and clammy skin.

"What can you tell me about her injuries, Sir?"

Jack's head came up at the question, his mouth coming open only to snap closed again. He hadn't been there; he didn't know. The thought sickened him. _I wasn't there. Dear God. She needed me, and I wasn't there._ Sensing his hesitation, Daniel answered the Doctor's question.

"Um, I know she got hit with a staff blast that knocked her out, but I'm not sure for how long. Other than that, we…ah…don't know. We found her outside the temple. She said she was okay, but didn't make it far before she collapsed."

"How long was she in there?"

Finding his voice, Jack answered quietly, "Just over 24 hours."

"Okay, we'll take care of her from here, Sir. We'll handle your post mission physicals as soon as we have Colonel Carter stabilized."

Jack nodded, his eyes never leaving Sam's pale face, his guilt threatening to overtake him. Shaking his head to dispel his dark thoughts, Jack firmly pulled himself together. Now was not the time to dwell on what had happened. Now he had to be "The General", his troops needed to see him in control of himself and the situation. There would be time enough for self-recriminations later. Much later. Watching as the medical technicians loaded Sam on the gurney and hustled her from the room, followed closely by Daniel and Teal'c, Jack felt a twinge of envy that they were able to go with her. But that too was not allowed of "The General" and again he pushed the emotion aside.

Looking up, Jack caught Reynolds' eye, the Colonel loitering just inside the doors to the 'gateroom. "We'll debrief at 1700. That should give you and your team time to get checked out by the Docs."

"Aye, sir. I'll inform the rest of the team."

"Go ahead and get cleaned up first. They're probably going to be a while with Carter."

"Will do, sir. See you in the infirmary."

Handing his P-90 off to the weapon's sergeant, Jack set off for the control room to get an update from Harriman. Every instinct in his body was screaming at him to get himself down to the infirmary; to be with Sam. But he had other responsibilities too. Responsibilities that he couldn't simply throw off when he didn't feel like dealing with them. The men and women of the SGC deserved better than that, and he knew Sam would expect that of him.

As he reached the top of the stairs, Jack found Walter already waiting for him, a clipboard in one hand, his headset dangling from his ear. Harriman fell into step with Jack as he made his way up the winding staircase toward his office.

"I'm sure you'll want a quick rundown so you can get to the infirmary, Sir," Sergeant Harriman began before Jack could even open his mouth. "I have your schedule cleared for the next several hours. The conference room is reserved for your 1700 debrief with Colonel Reynolds, SG-3 and SG-1. Your 1400 meeting with Doctor Felger has been postponed, I told him you would clear some time for him next week at the earliest. The requisitions for office supplies and the commissary are on your desk just waiting for your signature. The two briefings for SG-11 and SG-15's upcoming missions I passed on to Colonel Reynolds."

"Walter," Jack interrupted.

"Yes, sir?"

"Thank you."

"You're welcome, Sir."

"Just leave the rest of that on my desk. I'll take a look at all of it before the debrief. And don't worry about the briefings with SG's 11 and 15, I'll take care of them. Just reschedule them for first thing tomorrow morning. We can afford to put off those missions for one more day."

"Yes, Sir. I hope I didn't overstep my bounds. I just thought…"

"I know you did, and I appreciate it, Sergeant."

"Yes, Sir. Well…I'd better get back down to the control room." Walter paused momentarily. "Sir, if you need anything from us, you know we're here for you, right?"

"I know, Sergeant. And thank you. Dismissed."

"Yes, Sir," Walter replied before turning and heading back down to the control room.

Sighing, Jack stripped off his vest and jacket and dropped them into the visitor's chair before lowering himself down into his chair, uncapping a pen he set about clearing his desk so he could join the others in the infirmary just as soon as possible.

TBC….


	10. Chapter Ten

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Ten**

Daniel stood pacing outside the doors to the infirmary, and not for the first time glanced down the hallway toward the bank of elevators at its end, wondering why Jack wasn't there. Finally his agitation with his friend got the better of him and he said as much aloud.

"Where the hell is he? He should be here, not down in his office doing meaningless paperwork."

Teal'c inclined his head and raised a brow. "If you are referring to O'Neill, Daniel Jackson, I do not believe he feels as though his duties to the SGC are meaningless."

"Yeah, well, either way he should be here."

"I do not believe Colonel Carter would agree, Daniel Jackson. They both take their duties very seriously. She would not react kindly to O'Neill allowing his to be pushed aside if all he would be doing instead is sitting on an uncomfortable chair outside the infirmary."

"I think we're going to have to agree to disagree on this one Teal'c. I've never understood that 'duty and honor above all' mindset. I doubt I ever will."

"I believe you are right, Daniel Jackson. And I hope you never do understand it in the way O'Neill and Colonel Carter do."

Daniel snorted softly, but held his tongue, turning to lean against the doorframe leading into the infirmary, training his gaze through the narrow window to glimpse just the barest edges of Sam's bed and the hive of activity that surrounded it. The image of Sam lying unconscious at the base of the Stargate as he and Teal'c had fled through the wormhole was something for which he didn't think he would ever be able to fully atone. Sam was one of his closest friends, more like a sister. Leaving her behind fractured something in him that he was just beginning to grasp. He knew Sam wouldn't blame him for what he had done; she had ordered it, after all. But forgiving himself would be much harder.

The sound of the elevator doors opening and booted feet rounding the corner reached his ears and Daniel pulled his eyes away from the infirmary to see Jack walking toward them, looking more exhausted than Daniel had seen him in quite some time. Daniel's anger still simmered in his gut, but he wisely decided to let it go, for now. This was hardly the time for harsh words.

Jack rounded the corner and felt Daniel's eyes on him. Knowing the younger man as well as he did, Jack could guess what was on the archaeologist's mind, and right now he didn't have the strength to argue with him. Hoping to avoid a confrontation, Jack instead addressed himself to Teal'c.

"Any word yet?"

"Not yet, O'Neill."

Jack nodded before dropping wearily into a chair, running his hands through his short hair and across his face. Mildly surprised that rather than berate him for his absence, Daniel instead silently turned his attention back toward the infirmary. The tension in the younger man's shoulders bespoke his anger, but Jack was pathetically grateful he was keeping it to himself for now.

They had only been waiting for a few minutes when Daniel stepped back from the doors. "Doctor Brightman's coming."

Jack rose to his feet, nervous anxiety knifing through his gut as he tensed, expecting the worst, praying for the best.

Doctor Brightman pulled the sterile gloves from her hands as she pushed through the doors to face the three men in the outer hallway. "General, Daniel, Teal'c," She greeted, before gesturing toward the chairs. "Let's sit down for a minute and talk."

Daniel and Teal'c took seats to Jack's right and left, an unspoken gesture of support that was not lost on the General.

"So, what's the prognosis, Doc?"

Brightman wasted no time getting right to the point. "Colonel Carter suffered a very serious burn to her right calf from the initial staff blast. She has a bump on the side of her head that is likely from her fall doesn't appear to be severe and hopefully won't pose any long term problems. What has me worried is the infection. The leg wound went untreated a good deal longer than we would like and the infection is one that may or may not respond to normal antibiotic therapy. We simply don't know what kinds of bacteria she may have been exposed to on the planet. Right now our hope is that she will respond to the medication, but the fact that she is still unconscious is a concern."

"So what do we do next?" Jack asked, unease coloring his voice.

"Start her on broad spectrum antibiotics until the lab can give us a better idea what we're dealing with. Sir, this infection isn't the only thing to be concerned about."

Panic lanced through his chest and Jack's eyes widened perceptibly. "What else's wrong, Doc?"

"Colonel Carter's body shows signs of repeated physical abuse. We only did a cursory exam for now, but she has multiple bruises and contusions on her face and torso that may indicate internal trauma. We won't know for sure until we can get her into CT and have a look at her belly and get a better idea about the severity of her head injury. But all of that taken together with the fever from the infection that may explain her lack of consciousness."

The color drained from Jack's face as one of his worst fears was realized. Abused was such a politically correct term for tortured. Sam had been tortured, physically and likely mentally as well. He himself knew all too well the horrors Ba'al could inflict on those he had captured. But Sam was a woman, and the torture she suffered may have gone beyond even what he had endured. As much as it sickened him to even think about it, he had to ask; had to know.

"Doc, was there any other signs of um…any other….ah…" Jack trailed off, unable to frame the words aloud.

Doctor Brightman was perceptive enough to know what he meant. "As you know, Sir, as we added more women to the expeditionary teams, we prepared protocols to deal with these types of situations. I have not yet had time to perform a thorough examination on Colonel Carter. But per those protocols, I will do so just as soon as her condition allows."

Jack nodded weakly, nausea clawing at the back of his throat. "Okay. Okay."

"I will report any findings just as soon as I am able, Sir. We'll be moving the Colonel down to CT in a few minutes. Those tests will likely take an hour or so and then we'll bring her back up to the ICU. By the time you finish your debriefing we should be ready to let you all in to see her. In the mean time, the physician's assistants are ready to complete your post mission physicals."

As Doctor Brightman pushed herself to her feet, Jack rose from his chair as well. "Thanks, Doc."

"Yes, Sir." Doctor Brightman turned to face the three men standing before her. "I'm not going to pull any punches here, gentlemen. We've got a long road ahead of us and there are likely going to be setbacks along the way. This infection is no small matter. It could clear up in a few days, or it could just as easily be fatal."

"Carter'll be fine," Jack said, immediately, his tone brooking no argument. "Don't worry about that, Doc."

"I hope you're right, Sir," Doctor Brightman replied, tucking her hands into her jacket pockets and turning to re-enter the infirmary.

Jack cast his eyes down at his boots, shoving his hands deep into his pockets, sighing deeply.

"Jack, what did she mean, protocols for women on expeditionary teams?" Daniel asked tentatively, but he had a horrible sensation he knew what it entailed.

"Daniel, I think you know what she meant," Jack replied quietly.

Daniel paled slightly, bile rising into his throat. "You don't actually think Ba'al…"

"I don't know, Daniel. That's what the protocols are for. We have to know for sure. If she was…well, we have to know."

Swallowing hard, Daniel nodded gravely. "You're right, we do."

"I'll see you both at the debrief. 1700."

As Jack turned and headed into the infirmary, Teal'c came to stand at Daniel's side. "I am unclear about these protocols for female team members, Daniel Jackson."

"Jack is afraid Sam may have been…sexually assaulted," Daniel replied, his voice rough with emotion.

"I see. And you fear for her mental well being, if that was the case?"

"Yes and no. Actually I'm more worried about what he'll do if the answer is yes."

"Indeed."

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The debriefing was a subdued affair. Colonel Reynolds delivered his report with his usual thoroughness and efficiency, briefing the General on his version of events from the point where they exited the Stargate until they returned to the SGC.

"So, what about this weapon, Daniel? You said before the Jaffa mentioned a test at the end of a cycle, or something. How much time do you think that gives us?"

"I'm really not sure. It could be they were referring to the lunar cycle on P7X-035, or they could have been referring to the lunar cycle in some other planet in a completely different solar system. If it was -035, then according to the boys down in the lab who analyzed the malp telemetry, they figure we have about four and a half to five Earth weeks to get back there and disable the weapon before they use it."

"And did you actually hear them say they were going to test it on Earth?"

Daniel thought for a moment, concentrating on his memories of the overheard conversation. "Actually, no, I didn't. They never mentioned Earth specifically. But can we take that chance, Jack?"

The General sat back in his chair. "No, we can't. We have to assume they intend to use it either on Earth or against one of our allies. The Tok'ra or the Free Jaffa. Either way, we have to destroy it. Even if they aren't planning on using it here for this test, it's only a matter of time before they turn the damn thing on Earth. We have to take it out while we have a chance. Colonel Reynolds, how long do you think it will take to plan and mount a full scale strike against that facility?"

Reynolds unconsciously sat up straighter in his chair, "I'm going to need Doctor Jackson and Teal'c to draw up the layout of the temple and the surrounding terrain, as best they can recall. Once we have an idea what it's like inside, we can better plan an attack. But Sir, for the best chances of success, we'll need to know what Colonel Carter may have seen or heard while she was inside. She escaped from there, Sir. She may have intel vital to the success of any strike mission."

"Yes, well…right now we don't know when the Colonel might be able to debrief us. Assume for now she is unavailable and proceed accordingly."

"Yes, Sir. I'll have a preliminary report for you by tomorrow afternoon."

"Daniel, Teal'c, draw up what you remember about -035 ASAP. Details count here. I want to be sure we cover all our bases on this one. We can't afford to screw this up," Jack said, rising to his feet. "Dismissed."

Jack turned and headed for his office, closing the door behind him. He knew Daniel was still upset with him, could feel the tension during the briefing, but he didn't have time to dwell on that now. Sitting down to take a few minutes to clear the last of the requisitions and urgent memos from his desk, Jack dumped them all into his out bin for Walter to deal with and then headed down to the infirmary.

He hadn't heard from Doctor Brightman as of yet, and hoped that in this case, no news was good news. Arriving on level 21, Jack fought the dread that built up in his belly with each passing step. It wasn't as though he hadn't known something like this could happen; that either of them could be injured in the line of duty. But the possibility of capture and torture was something he hadn't let himself imagine; the consequences were now staring him square in the face and he had been the first to look away.

Pushing through the doors to the infirmary, Jack walked toward the far corner of the spacious room. As one of his last acts as commanding officer of the SGC, General Hammond had approved a restructuring of the infirmary facilities, including a new intensive care unit equipped to treat not only SGC personnel but also any injured Tok'ra or Jaffa who may find themselves under the SGC's care. Nicknamed the 'Hammond Wing', the medical staff had been like kids with a new toy when the wing had opened last month. This was the first time the unit had housed a patient, a distinction he hardly thought Sam would appreciate.

The intensive care unit held two beds in a roughly semi-circular room. The far corner of the infirmary formed the rear of the room. The outer walls were constructed of glass to allow the nurses constant view of their patients. The unit had been set up with all the equipment that could be found in the best hospitals in the world, enabling the staff to deal with virtually any eventuality.

A small nurse's station had been set up just outside the doors of the unit and it was there that Jack found Doctor Brightman briefing the nurses on staff. Daniel and Teal'c sat in the visitor's chairs just to one side of the station. Whether they were waiting for him to arrive, or waiting for the Doc to give them to green light to go in and see Sam, Jack wasn't sure.

"Keep me apprised of any changes in the Colonel's condition. I want to know immediately if her temperature spikes or there are any changes in her heart rate or respiration."

"Yes, ma'am," they replied, turning to attend to their duties.

Doctor Brightman noticed Jack standing a short distance away, staring through the glass walls of the ICU at Sam's pale figure lying impossibly still between the crisp, white sheets. Jack watched as the lights on the monitors winked on and off in an incomprehensible language. All he knew is that so long as those lights continued to blink, Sam was alive and there was still hope.

"General O'Neill, I was just on my way to make my report."

"Doc," Jack acknowledged. "How's she doin'?"

Catching a glimpse of Daniel and Teal'c rising to their feet to join the conversation, Doctor Brightman nodded toward her office. "Why don't we talk in there, Sir."

"Doc, please, just tell me what you know," Jack said determinedly, his frustration suddenly rising up. "I don't want to sit down, I don't want to be more comfortable. I just want to be brought up to speed on Carter's condition."

"Yes, Sir. The lab results aren't back yet, but her CT scans show no evidence of any severe internal injuries or head trauma. She does have a mild concussion and several bruised ribs, but neither should pose any long term problems. The infection continues to be our main concern. Her body temperature has risen to 103 degrees and so far we've been unable to bring it down. I believe it's the infection that's putting a strain on the rest of her system, preventing her from regaining consciousness."

"How long do you think it'll be before she wakes up?" Daniel asked worriedly.

"There's no way to be sure. She could wake up in an hour, or a day, or a week."

"Or never," Jack supplied, his voice a bare whisper.

"Or never," Brightman confirmed.

"And what about…the rest?" Jack asked, his voice low as though he were afraid of the answer.

"I performed a complete examination on Colonel Carter, Sir. I found no evidence of any abuse not already reported."

The relief that poured through him threatened to take his legs out from under him and for a moment Jack was lightheaded with it. Dropping his chin to his chest he blew out a breath and sank down into the nearest chair.

"Jack, you okay?"

"Yeah, Daniel. Fine. Go ahead Doc."

"Well, for now we monitor her condition. Provide whatever support she might need over the next few days. The key right now is to get a handle on this infection and get her fever down."

Jack nodded his understanding. "Can we see her now?"

"Of course, Sir. But please, only two of you in her room at a time. We need to have room for the nurses to work."

"Okay, we can do that."

"Why don't you and Teal'c go in first, huh? I can wait." Daniel offered, his gaze flitting nervously away from Jack's.

Jack drew in a deep breath, steeling himself and then pushed himself to his feet and turned toward the ICU doors. Reaching out an unsteady hand, Jack rested his palm momentarily on the cool metal of the door handle before he grasped it and pushed down, disengaging the latch and pushing the door open.

He thought he had prepared himself to see Sam up close, but that first sight of her lying ghostly pale, unmoving, her body tethered to IV lines and monitors staggered him and Jack nearly retreated out of the room. Teal'c lay a reassuring hand on his shoulder; pulling a deep breath into his lungs and blowing it back out, Jack drew on the strength of the man at his side and crossed the short distance from the doorway to Sam's bedside.

Looking down at her bruised, drawn face Jack's chest tightened painfully and he gripped the side rails tightly, attempting to center himself. With a shaking hand, Jack smoothed the hair back from Sam's sweat dampened forehead, allowing his hand to rest briefly on her cheek before reaching down to grasp her hand in his.

"Oh Sam. What'd they do to you?" Jack whispered brokenly, his throat closing, choking him.

Jack could sense Teal'c standing at his elbow, his silent presence oddly calming. The Jaffa simply stood, his hands clasped behind his back, his face an unreadable mask. They stood there for several minutes, side-by-side, neither speaking. Finally Teal'c broke the silence.

"Samantha is an incredibly strong person, O'Neill. She will recover from this."

"Damn straight."

"Shall I leave, allow Daniel Jackson some time with you?"

"Sure, T."

Teal'c inclined his head and turned to leave, but Jack's voice pulled him back just before he reached the door.

"T?"

"Yes, O'Neill?"

Jack lifted his head, his eyes locking with the Jaffa's. "Thank you."

Teal'c inclined his head again, then left silently, leaving the door slightly ajar. Daniel appeared in the doorway, making his way to Sam's bedside opposite Jack. He reached out and took up her other hand, grasping it lightly within his own.

"Hey Sam. How ya doin' huh?" Daniel said softly. "Why don'cha open your eyes for us, okay? We're all here waiting for you." Seeing Sam looking so vulnerable weakened his resolve to stay strong and Daniel felt the beginnings of tears burning in the corners of his eyes.

"I never should have left her there."

It was whispered so quietly that Jack wasn't sure what Daniel had said. "What?"

"I never should have left her, Jack. I left her behind. This is my fault."

"Daniel, this is not your fault. You did what Sam expected you to do, follow her orders and bring critical intel back to us. I know she doesn't blame you for anything that happened after that. Neither do I."

"Yeah, well, I blame me, Jack. I blame me."

"And if you had stayed, what? What?" When Daniel simply stared at him, Jack continued. "I'll tell you what, you'd be lying in that bed right beside her, that's what. Or worse, you could be dead. And if you had disobeyed orders and stayed behind, Teal'c would've too. Then where would Earth be? Unaware of the weapon Ba'al had waiting for us. We'd be sittin' here, big, fat, dumb, and happy, totally oblivious to what was about to happen."

Deep down, Daniel knew Jack was right. But knowing it and feeling it were two different things. He would never feel right about what he had done on -035. Never.

"How can you say that, Jack? Seeing her like this, how can you honestly say that?" Daniel whispered accusingly.

"What do you want from me, Daniel? What do you want me to say?"

"Nothing Jack. I don't want you to say anything."

"She did what she had to do. What her country and her planet demanded of her. I don't blame her for that. And neither should you."

Daniel's head snapped up, a shocked look painted on his face, but he couldn't deny what he was feeling. If Sam hadn't been so adamant about doing her duty, she wouldn't be here now and he wouldn't be facing the loss of yet another person he loved. He simply didn't think he could face it again.

"I will never understand this Jack. I will never understand the willing sacrifice of even one life."

"You may not understand it, Daniel. But you will have to live with it. Just like I will."

Daniel shook his head. "I don't want to argue with you, Jack. Not here. I'm going to go out and wait with Teal'c." Bending down, he placed a feather light kiss on Sam's forehead. "I'll be back to see ya later, Sam."

Gently laying her hand back down on the bed, Daniel turned and quietly exited the room, leaving Jack alone with his guilt and grief.

TBC….


	11. Chapter Eleven

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Eleven**

Jack wasn't sure how long he had stood at Sam's bedside but it seemed as though he had been standing there, listening to the soft beeping of the monitors, for hours. Eventually he gave in to his throbbing knees and pulled up a nearby chair, lowering the side rail of the bed so that he could still reach out and hold Sam's hand. How many times had he sat here like this? Watching over an injured friend or team mate? How many more times would he have to watch over Sam like this?

Jolinar, the computer borne entity, the time she had been missing along with the crew of the Prometheus, her near death after the self-destruction of the alpha site and her encounter with one of Anubis' drone. Any one of those encounters could have killed her, should have killed her. And yet, she had survived. And now, here they were again, and Jack could only pray that her strength of will would see her through again; that she would survive against the odds one more time.

Turning his thoughts away from such dark memories, Jack forced himself to remember happier times, for both of them. Immediately springing to mind was a time, before her reassignment to Area 51, when he realized that even though she may have been engaged to another man, he hadn't lost the core of their friendship that had so characterized their relationship for the past seven years.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

_It had only been a few weeks since he had taken over command of the SGC and things hadn't been entirely smooth for the new General. Jack had been dealing with one seeming crisis after another, starting with the visit from Ba'al and now culminating in a day of non-stop meetings with nearly every scientist on base. The meetings had been stacking up for the last week or so and he had hoped to put them off long enough that he wouldn't have to deal with them, but to no avail. So now, much to his chagrin, the meetings had all landed on one day._

_But the day was nearly over, and all that remained was for him to clear his desk and he could finally go home, put his feet up and settle in with some mindless television and a couple of cold beers. At this point, after spending the last two hours listening to Dr. Lee prattle on about some gizmo SG-2 brought back from P2X…whatever, Jack thought that a beer and some TV sounded just about like heaven._

_As he entered his office, he rounded his desk without really acknowledging the pile of memos and reports piled on top of it to drop down heavily into his chair. It wasn't until he moved to pull himself up closer to his workspace that he noticed a small plate sitting squarely in the middle of it. Glancing quickly around his office in search of whomever may have left it, he turned his attention then back to the plate itself, noting not only the plate with a large piece of double chocolate cake but also a small note peeking out from underneath._

_Confused, but more importantly curious, Jack slid the plate aside slightly to pull out the note and opened it. The handwriting was all too familiar and he felt a smile involuntarily spring to life on his face, banishing his fatigue without effort._

**General,**

**Thought you could use this after your briefing with Dr. Lee. Try not to work too late. Generals get to go home eventually too. See you tomorrow at our morning briefing.**

**C-**

_Jack's smile widened as he read and then re-read the note. The fact that Carter had taken the time not only to notice his inordinately busy scientist schedule that day but also to grab one of his favorites from the commissary and leave it for him warmed him through and he felt a surge of affection that he thought he had finally put behind him. He spent a moment simply enjoying the feeling before he pulled the saran wrap off the cake and dug in with the fork left off to the side._

_In what seemed like no time at all, both the cake and the last of the most urgent business left on his desk had been finished and he was heading for the surface and home. As he made his way through the nearly empty streets of Colorado Springs, he suddenly felt the overwhelming urge to thank Sam. Deciding he was acting like a foolish teenager with a crush, Jack shook his head before turning off on the road that led toward home._

_Jack kicked off his shoes at the door as he entered his quiet house. Flopping down on the couch he toyed with the remote briefly before dropping it back onto the coffee table and reaching over to pick up the phone. He paused, considering the wisdom of what he was about to do, but decided to throw caution to the wind and began to dial. It was just a phone call, after all. Right? And it would only be polite of him to call and say thank you. Certainly safer than just showing up unannounced on her doorstep. Besides, she was still engaged to Pete. It wasn't as though anything would come from a simple phone call._

_At the time, he hadn't considered the possibility that Sam would break off her engagement to Shanahan or that they could ever find a way around the regulations that had kept them apart for so long. He had simply wanted to rekindle a friendship that had seemed to grow distant over the preceding months. Later, that fateful decision hardly seemed as difficult as it had that night. And he could scarcely bring himself to regret it now, knowing the happiness taking that road had ultimately brought him. And he believed, had brought Sam too. _

"Colonel?" Sam whispered, her voice barely carrying over the sounds of the machines surrounding her.

Jack sat up straighter in his chair, Sam's voice pulling him from the past and back to the present. Her eyes were open slightly and Jack could see the fever still burning brightly within their blue depths.

"Colonel? Sam whispered again, her voice cracking with emotion.

Closing his eyes momentarily in relief, Jack stole a quick glance around the infirmary looking for someone who could go and notify the Doc she was awake. Jack couldn't see anyone nearby and was unwilling to leave to go in search of a nurse or Doc Brightman. Sam twisted her head agitatedly and Jack reached out to take her hand in both of his own, speaking in low, soothing tones. "I'm here, Sam. You're going to be okay. I'm right here."

"Sorry s-sir…never meant…you all…shouldn't be here…j-just wanted to save…Dad," Sam choked out brokenly and at first Jack couldn't fathom what she was talking about. _Dad? What the...?_

Sam's hand tightened convulsively on his, startling him with her strength and intensity. "Dad…please, sir. Don't let them take Dad…won't survive it…Blood…Sokar…too much." And suddenly Jack realized why Sam was so upset. The mission to hell, literally and figuratively. Apophis had taken them in turn and tortured them with the Blood of Sokar, meant to soften their mental resolve by creating some very vivid hallucinations. Jack's heart sank with the realization that the fever now raging in her body had forced Sam to relive that particularly terrifying time.

Jack tightened his own grip on Sam's hand as he leaned closer to smooth the sweat dampened hair from her forehead. "I won't Sam. I won't let them take him. I promise."

"If I don't….don't make it back…please…look after…my Dad, sir…please," Sam pleaded, tears that she would never have let fall had she been in her right mind coursing silently down her cheeks.

"I will, Sam. I will. Have I ever lied to you?" Jack replied, his own emotions crowding around him like unwanted guests. Had she truly felt as though she wouldn't make it out of Netu alive?

Sam's face creased into a slight smile and she shook her head. "N-never, sir."

"Okay then," Jack said as he moved his touch from her forehead to take her clammy hand in both of his. "Rest now. Everything's going to be fine."

The assurances seemed to filter down through the fevered haze and Sam relaxed perceptibly, her eyes slowly drifting closed as she nodded. "Yessir."

Jack watched as the tension slowly ebbed from her face and limbs as sleep claimed her. He sighed deeply, sitting back into his chair but not releasing his hold on Sam's now limp hand. He just wasn't sure if he was cut out for this. His emotions were things he rarely dwelled on, but lately his new relationship with Sam had drawn some of those feelings out and into the open. And now here he was, wondering if he could handle someone needing him this much. Not that he didn't want to be there for Sam; nothing could be further from the truth.

Self appraisal wasn't something O'Neill did often, but for once he was willing to be honest enough with himself to acknowledge his need to do it. The roaring fear that had threatened to overwhelm him in the first few hours after Daniel and Teal'c had returned without Sam was finally beginning to diminish, allowing him to examine what had happened with a more detached eye. The terror he had experienced when it had finally become clear what had happened and that Sam was either already dead or likely in Ba'al's hands had quite frankly shocked the hell out of him. He had known that the shift in his relationship with Sam would bring unforeseen consequences, but he hadn't imagined the feelings he had kept repressed for years would grow to be so strong so very fast. It honestly scared him, and more than just a little bit.

_Come on O'Neill, old boy. It's not that Sam needs you, it's that you need her. And not just a little bit. You can no more live without her anymore than you could go without breathing, and you know it._ Jack chided himself, alarmed at the truth of it. In the past it had been others who needed him, Sara certainly included. But he had never seemed to need anyone as much as they needed him. Now, for the first time in his life, he was on the other side of the fence and he truly didn't know how to deal with it. He had come too far this time, laid his heart open further than at any other point in his life. He knew that there would be no turning back from this without destroying himself in the process. He only wondered if Sam knew that too.

Their fledgling relationship was so new to the both of them, that any declarations of undying love seemed terribly premature. Yet, here he was, contemplating just that; his undying and depthless love for Samantha Carter. _Holy Crap._

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The nurse on duty had arrived shortly after Sam had slipped back into sleep and had immediately kicked Jack out of the room as she summoned Doctor Brightman. The Doc arrived and both had gone over the readouts from Sam's monitors, checking and re-checking her condition. In the end, Doctor Brightman had expressed some cautious optimism and then had ordered Jack to get some food and at least four hours sleep before returning. The General had put up a valiant fight, claiming that he needed neither, but when the Doctor threatened him with sedatives and a feeding tube, he finally acquiesced, leaving the infirmary to go in search of the rest of SG-1.

Jack wandered past Teal'c's quarters and then down to Daniel's lab, and when both locations had turned up nothing, he had reluctantly given in to his rumbling stomach and headed for the commissary. Pushing through the doors, the relative emptiness of the room confused him. Pulling up his shirt sleeve to squint at his watch, Jack surprised to discover it was nearly 0100. Glancing around the room, he spotted Daniel and Teal'c, sitting at a table against the far wall, heads bent in conversation.

Deciding he needed coffee first and foremost before facing Daniel again, Jack snagged a mugful then made his way over to sit with his former team mates. The conversation at the table dropped off as he approached, Daniel and Teal'c looking up at him expectantly, each appearing as weary as he felt.

"Teal'c, Daniel," Jack greeted, pulling out a chair and dropping tiredly into it.

"O'Neill, how is Colonel Carter?"

"Woke up for a couple of minutes just a bit ago, actually."

Daniel's face brightened perceptibly. "That's great Jack. How did she seem?"

"I'm not really sure. She didn't really know where she was. Called me 'Colonel' and thought we were all on Netu. Kept asking me to look after her Dad since she didn't think she was going to be able to herself."

"What did the Doctor have to say?"

"Doc seemed happy Sam had been awake, even for a few moments, but at the same time the fact that she's not in her right mind has her worried. She's not alone, either. All the times I've seen Carter hurt or sick, I've never seen her like that. Not knowing where she was or what was happening. Even with that concussion from the Prometheus last year she knew she was in the SGC."

Daniel nodded sympathetically. "Are you headed back up there now?"

"Ah, no, actually. Doc threatened me with all sorts of medical torture if I didn't get something to eat and at least a four hours of sleep."

"And that cup of coffee qualifies as food?"

"Have you ever had a cup of this coffee after it's been sitting here for a few hours? If I have to chew it, I call it food."

Daniel shook his head, then pushed his chair back from the table. "Let me go find something for you that won't eat a hole in your stomach."

"Thanks."

"Sure," the archaeologist replied, setting off in the direction of the kitchen.

Jack spent the next half an hour in the commissary, downing the ham and cheese sandwich and chocolate cake Daniel had managed to scrounge before heading off to his quarters for his requisite sleep. He figured if he disappeared from the infirmary for at least another couple of hours, he could stay in the Doc's good graces.

Pushing open the door to his on base bedroom, Jack sat on the edge of his bed, pulling off his boots and swinging his legs up on the bed. Reaching over, he set his alarm to wake him in three hours and then dropped off into a fitful sleep. His dreams were plagued with images of Sam, struggling against the gravity well on Ba'al's ship, a torture device he had come to know so well. Then the dreams shifted and he could see Ba'al, advancing on Sam with a bottle of acid in one hand, a wicked looking dagger in the other.

Her eyes locked on his as she pleaded with him to free her, to save her from the torture that was coming. But Jack was unable to move, kept totally immobile by some unseen force that held him rooted to the spot. Unable to move to help, but also unable to look away, Jack was forced to watch as Ba'al slowly raised the dagger, pointing it at the center of Sam's chest. The System Lord then turned, his gaze boring into Jack's own as he released the dagger, plunging it deep within Sam's breast.

Jack tumbled violently out of the dream, Sam's screams still ringing in his ears, the bed sheets tangled around his legs, holding him in place. A cold trickle of sweat ran between Jack's shoulder blades as he sat up, struggling to get his heart rate and breathing under control. He always hated waking up from dreams like that. Dreams that seemed so real they could almost be remnants of memory.

The last thing he wanted to do was attempt to go back to sleep, and so untangled his legs from the sheets and bent to pull on his boots. He had actually been asleep for nearly the three hours he had set aside for himself and at the very least he could kill the final hour of his exile by going up to his office and clearing out his inbox and email before returning to the medical wing.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

As Jack entered the infirmary, the feeling of unease he had been fighting since waking from his dream grew to form an undeniable rock sitting in the pit of his stomach. He would never describe the SGC's medical facilities as an energetic or boisterous place, but this morning the atmosphere was more subdued than usual. The hushed tones of the nurses as they tended to their duties fell to silence as he passed, further feeding his anxiety.

Never one to avoid confrontation or difficult situations, Jack headed straight for the ICU, unsurprised to find Daniel already at the nurse's station, deep in conversation with Dr. Brightman.

Looking through the glass walls of Sam's room, the ominous bulk of a ventilator placed nearby drew his attention. Jack would never again see that particular machine without wincing involuntarily in reaction, calling to mind the last time he had seen Sam connected to it, her life measured in minutes rather than years. He had struggled, then, with the decision whether or not to honor her last wishes as was dictated in her living will and disconnect her from life support or continue to hope against all hope, leaving her connected to the machines that at the time were keeping her body alive indefinitely. He could only pray that he wouldn't be called on to make that decision again.

Jack slowed his steps as he neared the unit, drawing the attention of the Doctor and archaeologist.

"Jack."

"General O'Neill."

"Daniel. Doc. How's she doin'?" Jack replied, attempting to interject as much hopefulness into his voice as possible.

The expressions on their faces were alone enough to answer his question. Not good.

"General…" Dr. Brightman began, but hesitated, searching for the right words. Honesty was always preferable in her line of work, but that honesty had to be tempered with an awareness not to strip away what flame of hope might still burn. "Colonel Carter's condition has not improved, despite her brief period of wakefulness a few hours ago. Her fever is still hovering between 102 and 104 degrees. I was just telling Dr. Jackson we are preparing to bring in some cooling blankets to help get her temperature down. Perhaps if we can get her fever to break, even for a short time, the antibiotics might be able to take care of whatever is at the root of this infection."

Jack's expression was both concerned and incredulous simultaneously. "Ya know Doc, usually I leave the medicine to you good folks in here, but doesn't this seem a bit…I dunno…primitive to you? All this high tech stuff in here and the best you have is to put Carter on ice?"

The Doctor's brow furrowed as she seriously considered the General's question.

"Sir, we have nearly exhausted what our technology and medications can do for Colonel Carter. If we allow this fever to continue for much longer we could be risking serious brain damage, or worse."

"Worse?" Daniel breathed, blanching in reaction.

"I'm concerned about the impact this infection is having on her lungs. It appears from her last chest x-ray that her lungs are beginning to fill with fluid, which is why I've ordered the ventilator placed in her room. If it's needed, it'll happen fast. Every moment will count."

Jack's heart froze within his chest. Up until that very moment, the thought had never crossed his mind that Sam wouldn't completely recover now that they were back safely within the SGC, despite the warnings the Doctor had given them about the severity of Sam's condition. Carefully schooling his expression, he allowed his gaze to fall upon the still form lying in the ICU. _No way in hell am I going to let that happen. No way. The Doc wants to put her in a deep freezer, fine, if it'll save her life._

Dragging his eyes back up, Jack drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Okay Doc. We'll do it your way. When will you get started?"

"Right now, sir. We really can't delay any longer."

Jack nodded slightly and then moved past Daniel to enter Sam's room. He pulled up a nearby chair and dropped unceremoniously into it, dragging a tired hand across his face and scrubbing it up through his short hair. He was aware of, but did not acknowledge Daniel as the younger man moved to stand next to him.

"Jack, why don't you go get some breakfast, huh? I'll stay here with Sam."

Jack shook his head slowly. "I appreciate it Daniel, but I couldn't eat anyway. I'll just stay here for a while."

Daniel nodded, not expecting any other response. He hesitated momentarily then allowed his hand to drop to rest lightly on Jack's shoulder. "If you need anything…"

The comforting touch startled Jack, especially after the harsh words the two men had exchanged just the day before. He allowed a small smile to touch his lips, "I know. Thanks."

Daniel nodded then headed off toward the doors of the infirmary intending to pay a visit to Teal'c before retiring to his quarters for some well deserved rest. He would need the Jaffa's help and support if they were all to endure the coming days.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

It only took a few minutes for the ICU team to prepare the specially designed cooling blankets and place them over Sam's feverish body. Jack watched silently as the medical staff went about their assigned tasks. As they finished and moved off into other parts of the infirmary Jack found himself finally alone, the silence broken only by the soft beeps of the monitors nearby.

Jack reached under the chill blanket to grasp Sam's hand in his own. The heat radiating from her body was in sharp contrast to the cool of the blanket and Jack was abruptly aware of the fragility of the life he held in his hand. The short, joyous time they had been allowed together suddenly seemed horribly inadequate compared with what he could imagine as his life without Sam.

Reaching up with his free hand, Jack gently ran the backs of his knuckles across Sam's cheek. She turned her head slightly at the contact, her brow furrowing in response.

"Shh. It's okay, Sam. You're going to be okay," Jack soothed, the sound of his voice carrying over the machines nearby. The exhaustion of the last several days, coupled with the fear that gripped his heart, weighed him down and Jack felt uncustomarily emotional.

"C'mon Dorothy, you promised you'd always come back to me. Don't you dare give up, you hear me? Don't die on me now. Not now. Please."

Bowing his head, Jack roughly forced down the feelings that threatened to overwhelm his suddenly fragile emotional barriers. He squirmed slightly in his chair, looking for a more comfortable position, settling in for the long wait ahead.

TBC…


	12. Chapter Twelve

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Twelve**

It was nearly 7 am when Jack finally relinquished his vigil at Sam's bedside to Daniel and stumbled off for some well deserved coffee and a hot shower. The day promised to be long and exhausting, but not nearly as much as the night had been. After showering, changing into a fresh set of BDU's and downing the requisite two cups of coffee, Jack felt nearly lifelike enough to at least face his office.

Plopping himself down in his chair and opening his laptop, Jack mechanically began reviewing his inbox, which seemed to miraculously spawn new items that needed his attention in just the few short hours since he had last been there. He wasn't sure just how long he had been at it when a soft knock at the door drew his attention. Seeing Daniel leaning against the doorframe, his face pale and drawn, sent his heart racing.

"Carter…?"

Daniel's eyes widened, not realizing what effect his unexpected presence might have on his friend. "The same, she's the same. I just thought I'd come up and see how you were doing."

Allowing his eyes to drift closed for a moment, Jack pried them open again. "I'm fine. Fine. Really."

"Yeah, sure you are."

"Well, if you already knew, why ask me the damned question, Daniel?" Jack retorted hotly, his temper rising to the surface as a barrier against the grief that was never far from breaking free.

Shoving his hands deep into his pockets, Daniel entered Jack's office, closing the door behind him. Sighing, he turned to face the furious face in front of him. "I'm sorry. About last night, what I said. You didn't need that from me right then. You needed my support and instead you got accusations. But you aren't the only one who's scared for her, you know."

Jack's mouth dropped open, a caustic reply on the tip of his tongue; but the retort fell away with the knowledge that Daniel was right. There were plenty of other people who cared about Sam and who were hurting right along with him. Pushing himself back from his desk, Jack let his head drop back to rest on the back of his chair in a posture of such utter exhaustion that Daniel was surprised he hadn't dropped from it yet.

"I don't think I can do this."

"What can't you do?"

Jack paused, measuring his reply. "I can't sit here and wait. It's eating me up."

Daniel nodded in sympathy. "I know."

"No, I don't think you do. I ordered her out there. Me. No one else. It's my responsibility. And my fault. And I don't think I can live with the consequences."

"Would it really be any better, for either of you, if it was someone else ordering her out there? Honestly?"

"I don't know."

"Yes you do. Deep down you do," Daniel replied gently.

"Yeah, I suppose. But goddamn it. I just want to…."

"Keep her safe. Whole. Alive."

"Yeah. All of that stuff, and more."

"Then why are you here? When she needs you right now?"

"Because she's not the only one who needs me. There are men and women out there right now who put their lives in my hands. I have a responsibility to them too, don't I?"

"Yes, you do. But none of them are Sam."

"No, they're not," Jack replied wearily, suddenly feeling much older than he did when he walked into his office that morning. "But she would expect me to care about what happens to them just as much as I care about what happens to her. We both accepted that when we started down this road."

Daniel nodded in agreement. "Yeah, she would. But I don't have to like it. From either of you."

"I know you don't Daniel. If you did, you wouldn't be the man we both respect."

Not knowing how to respond to such a statement, Daniel merely stood, opened the door before pausing in the doorway. "So, you'll be back up to the infirmary soon?"

"As soon as I can."

"Okay," The archaeologist replied softly before returning there himself. If he thought seeing them apart had been painful, seeing them together like this was even more so.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Despite his assurances to Daniel, it was well into the afternoon before Jack was able to clear his schedule and return to Sam's bedside. He was somewhat surprised to find Teal'c sitting in the chair he had occupied the night before, rather than Daniel.

"Teal'c."

"O'Neill. Colonel Carter has yet to awaken. Perhaps she was waiting for you to arrive."

"Listen, I've already gotten an earful from Danny-boy. I don't need another one from you."

Teal'c inclined his head, but said nothing.

Jack grabbed a chair from across the room, placing it next to Teal'c's, he sat down slowly, exhaustion in every line of his body.

"Where is Danny anyway? I expected to find him here."

"I…persuaded Daniel Jackson to return to his quarters for a period of sleep. He appeared to be nearly as tired as you, O'Neill."

"Yeah, well. I'll sleep when I'm dead."

"At your current pace, that will likely be sooner rather than later. And I have no wish to explain to Colonel Carter why I allowed you to become ill during her temporary absence."

Jack smiled slightly at the image. "She'd kick your ass, T."

"Indeed."

His smile broadened before fading again. "Compromise then? I'll rack out right next door here, if you come get me in a couple of hours."

"It is a deal."

"Two hours, big guy. Or I'll be the one kicking your ass."

"I believe that you would try, O'Neill."

"That was a joke. I know. I'm getting better at spotting them," Jack murmured as he pulled off his boots and climbed into an empty bed, dragging the sheet and rough blanket over his shoulders. Teal'c was certain he was asleep almost as soon as his head struck the thin pillow.

It was closer to four hours before Teal'c reached over to shake Jack awake, but the extra rest seemed to have done him considerable good and the big Jaffa sincerely doubted that O'Neill would follow through with his threats. There was still exhaustion lurking behind Jack's eyes, but it was diminished by his rest. But Teal'c knew that little, aside from Samantha's recovery, that would erase that pall entirely.

"How's she doin'?"

"Still the same, O'Neill."

Jack nodded as he returned to the chair he had abandoned and bent over to lace up his boots. "You eat yet, T.?"

"I have not. Do you require sustenance, O'Neill?"

"Yeah, actually, I think I might be a bit hungry. How about you snag us both a couple of trays from the commissary?" Sleeping and eating had been rather low on his priority list, but now that he had indulged in one, the other seemed necessary as well.

"I shall return momentarily."

"T.?"

"Yes, O'Neill."

"Thanks."

Teal'c knew the acknowledgement was for more than just food. "As you say on Earth, that is what friends are for."

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Jack maintained his vigil at Sam's bedside for another two hours before reluctantly returning to his office. He knew Daniel and Teal'c had taken time out during the day to complete their reports about what they had seen in and around Ba'al's facilities on -035 and he expected to have the Colonel's report on his desk by now, waiting for his review. As much as he wanted to agree with Daniel, give in to his longing to stay with Sam the base and the Goa'uld be damned, he simply couldn't. All his adult life he had lived by a code of honor that required diligence to duty above all else. He had sacrificed his first marriage to it, he knew well the sacrifices that had been made. But this time he was with someone who fully understood his code; someone who lived by a code that ran just as deep as his own.

Entering his office, Jack was surprised to find his inbox empty and his laptop packed inside its carrying case, his desk suspiciously free of memos and requisition forms. Turning around to go in search of Walter, Jack nearly crashed headlong into the intrepid Sergeant.

"General!" Harriman exclaimed, taking a step back involuntarily.

"Sergeant, what's going on around here? Why is my desk….like that?" Jack motioned over his shoulder at the unusually clean workspace.

"Ah, well, actually that was Doctor Jackson's, Sir."

"Daniel? What's he got to do with my desk?"

"Well Sir, I believe Doctor Jackson felt that if you insisted on keeping up with your work, the least we could do is make it portable for you, so you could take it with you. Wherever you might be. On the base. Anywhere on the base."

Understanding dawned on him and Jack nearly smiled. Never one to admit defeat, ol' Danny-boy had found a way to ensure they both got their way.

"I get it, Sergeant. So, you finished up here?"

"Yes, Sir. I was just bringing you the report Colonel Reynolds dropped off. I was about to pack all of this up and bring it down to you."

"I'll take it. Everything else in there already?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Okay. Anyone needs me, I'll be down in the infirmary."

"Yes, Sir."

Jack scooped up the briefcase and reports and was about to head down the stairs when Walter's voice stopped him.

"Ah….Sir?"

"Yeah, Walter?"

"How is she, Sir? We really haven't heard much up here and everyone's been asking."

Jack dropped his eyes briefly before responding. "She's still the same."

Harriman nodded sadly. "We're all pulling for her, Sir."

"I know you are. I know. And we both appreciate it."

The unquestioning support he had received from the rank and file at the SGC had always made him a bit uncomfortable; but now, when he was feeling particularly low, the sentiments seemed to buoy him and he drew on that feeling.

Down in the infirmary, Jack got a short update from the nurses. He had been somewhat disappointed to learn that Sam's fever had come down, but not enough to declare her out of danger. Still lying beneath the cooling blankets, they reported that she had been resting comfortably in his absence.

Commandeering a small table, Jack set himself up next to the nurse's station where he could both work and see Sam simultaneously. Pulling out Reynolds' report first, he set about reading through the layout of the temple and the surrounding forest and also Reynolds own assessment of the feasibility of taking out the weapon before Ba'al could turn it on them. The Marine's report was frank, brutal in its honesty, right down to the casualty estimates, which according to this were anywhere from five to fifteen percent of the strike force.

Jack grimaced at the thought of sending good men and women on a mission, knowing some of them wouldn't be returning. But it had to be done, and all of them knew it. Considering the nearly 100 percent probability of hostile action, Jack had already decided this mission would be totally volunteer. He wasn't going to order anyone to take part, and if he knew is troops as well as he suspected, he wouldn't have any shortage of willing and able team members.

Jack jotted down some notes on a pad of paper that he would later type into an email for Colonel Reynolds, outlining the suggestions he had for a final strike plan. Some may have considered his diligent planning unusual in the formerly 'fly by the seat of his pants' officer, but since he had taken over as commanding officer of the SGC, prudence was the order of the day. No unnecessary risks. Period. And this mission was going to be risky enough without adding shoddy planning into the mix.

Just as he was finishing up his notes, Jack noticed Doctor Brightman leave her office and walk in his direction. Closing the report and his notes, Jack rose from his chair.

"Doc? What's the good word?"

"The lab just called with the results of Colonel Carter's blood tests. The organism that's causing this infection is very similar to the bacteria that causes pneumococcal meningitis. But based on what we're seeing here, it affects the pulmonary system rather than the brain stem."

"In English, Doc. What does that mean for Carter?"

"Now that we know what we're dealing with, we can use antibiotics specifically designed to work on the pneumococcal bacteria. They should be more effective than the broad spectrum antibiotics we've had her on."

"Okay, so when do you start that?"

"Right now, Sir. I've sent a request to the pharmacy to send up the appropriate meds."

"Okay. Okay. So this is a good thing."

"Yes, Sir. Knowing what we're dealing with is always a good thing. Now we just have to hope the new medications work."

"It'll work, Doc. It has to," Jack said, allowing his gaze to stray into Sam's room. "I'm gonna go on in, sit with her for a while. If anyone comes looking for me, unless the base's about to be overrun, tell them to come back later."

"Will do, Sir."

Jack returned to the seat he had vacated a few hours earlier, reaching out to take Sam's hand in his own again. He could hear her breaths, rattling deep in her chest, the sound reminding him of crackling parchment paper. It terrified him.

It was times like these when he sincerely questioned his decision to come out of retirement when General Hammond had summoned him. These times when the future seemed impossibly bleak, and success so very far away. Times when he saw his friends, people he cared about, injured and in pain; and it wore on him like nothing else ever had.

"C'mon, Sam. Wake up for me, okay? We need you out here. We've got to go back and take out that temple and we could sure use your help with that. Besides, I need you to help me with Daniel. He's really pissed at me this time and I don't know how to fix it. You always know how to handle him. What to say to make it better," Jack paused, squeezing Sam's hand between his. "Ya know, truth is, I need you. I didn't realize just how much until now. I need you, Sam. Please, come back to me."

Hoping against hope for some sign of wakefulness, Jack was disappointed when he saw none. Resigning himself to another long night, he sat back in his chair making himself as comfortable as possible. Daniel had appeared about an hour later, bringing with him a tray from the commissary that Jack actually ate some of while the archaeologist sat with Sam. Jack convinced him to get some sleep somewhere around midnight, and reluctantly the younger man agreed, promising to return first thing in the morning.

As the night progressed, the nurses came and went, injecting medications into Sam's IV, adjusting settings on the monitors. Sometime around 0100 the night nurse bustled in, saying something about oxygen levels that Jack didn't understand but thought it sounded ominous. She uncoiled a thin, clear tube from a holder on the wall and draped it over Sam's shoulder, looping it over each of her ears and placing one clear plastic tube in each nostril.

"Just a precaution," she had said, but to Jack it seemed as though things were getting worse, rather than better.

Over the next couple of hours, Jack clung to the wet sound of Sam's breathing, knowing if he could hear that, she was still with him; still alive.

The nurses continued to come and go barely within his awareness as Jack simply sat and listened to Sam breathe. He had been concentrating so completely on that horrible sound that when it stopped, at first Jack didn't understand what was missing. When it dawned on him that he could no longer hear the sodden sound of air being pulled in and out of Sam's lungs, he froze, closing his eyes tightly in horror. He sat there for several moments, praying for a return of the sound that had sustained him through the night, unwilling to open his eyes to confirm what his ears were telling him. Sam had stopped breathing. Sam was dead.

"Jack?"

The reed thin voice startled him so completely that his eyes popped open involuntarily. Jack was stunned to see Sam's eyes, barely open, gazing at him.

"Sam?" Jack breathed, wondering if his mind was playing tricks on him. He'd heard her breathing stop. Hadn't he?

Her brow furrowed in confusion. "Wha' happen? Where'm I?"

Jack's face creased into a broad answering smile and he pulled one of his hands free from hers to caress her cheek. "You're at the SGC, Sam. You're going to be fine. Everything's gonna be just fine."

"SGC?"

"Yeah. What's the last thing you remember?"

Sam's eyes drifted shut, her forehead wrinkling in concentration. "Jaffa…woods… running through woods…" Sam whispered. "I…I don't….remember…," She began before breaking off suddenly, her eyes flying open in panic. "Teal'c….Daniel… okay?"

"Yeah. They're fine, I promise. They made it back just fine. Been pretty worried about you."

Sam squeezed her eyes closed in relief. "Thank God."

"You did good, Sam. You got them out and you survived to get yourself out. Right now that's all that matters."

Sam nodded weakly, forcing her eyes open again to study Jack's face. "Look tired."

"Nah, nothing a hot shower and a cup of coffee won't cure."

Sam could see the exhaustion lurking behind Jack's casual smile, but didn't have the strength right now to argue the point with him. She could feel the tendrils of sleep pulling at her and knew slumber wasn't far off. Sam felt Jack lean in closer, the spicy smell of him that had always been uniquely Jack O'Neill tickling at her nose; felt the rough texture of his beard as he pressed a feather light kiss on her forehead before he leaned his cheek against hers.

"I love you, Sam," He whispered, his breath caressing her ear; felt the dampness of his tears as they tracked down his cheek.

"Love you, too," She managed to reply, a slight smile gracing her lips.

Jack pulled back from her slightly. "Rest now, okay? I'll be here when you wake up."

Sam nodded, finally allowing her eyes to slide closed. Squeezing Jack's hand, she let go and slipped back into the welcoming arms of sleep.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The nurse on duty arrived shortly after Sam had gone back to sleep and when Jack reported she had been awake very briefly, had immediately summoned Doctor Brightman. As they examined Sam, she drifted awake again, grousing softly about the noise and joking about asking for her money back for the room. The light quip brought smiles of relief from all present.

Doc Brightman finished her exam and then gestured to Jack and indicated they would talk outside.

"So, Doc. What do you think?"

"Her temperature is down to 100.6 and the fact that she is lucid and knows where she is are all excellent indications. She's still weak, but the antibiotics are definitely working. Her oxygen levels are a bit low, but her lungs have improved significantly. Honestly, Sir, I never expected the drugs to work so quickly. I'm at a bit of a loss to explain it."

"Yes, well, you know what they say about gift horses, Doc. And I'm not about to look this one in the mouth."

Doctor Brightman smiled, "No, Sir. You're right. I'll want to keep her in the ICU for the next several hours, but if she continues to improve at this rate, we can move her into the ward later this afternoon."

Jack nodded, the long night and emotional morning beginning to catch up with him as he stifled a yawn.

"Why don't you go get some sleep, Sir?"

"I will, Doc, just as soon as I pass along the news to a few folks first."

Jack stole a glance at his watch, and noting the time, set off for the commissary. At nearly 0700, it was more than likely that he would catch Teal'c or Daniel or both sitting down to breakfast.

Pushing open the double doors, Jack spotted them both, sitting at their usual table toward the back of the room. Daniel noticed his arrival first, his face creased with worry and lack of sleep. Jack made for their table and wasted no time filling them both in.

"She's awake."

Daniel's eyes slid closed and his shoulders slumped in obvious relief. "Oh thank God. Thank God," He murmured softly. "When?"

" 'Bout an hour ago."

"And her state of mind, O'Niell?"

"She's fine. Remembers most of what happened, at least up to the point where she escaped, but not much after that. First thing she wanted to know was whether the two of you made it back okay."

"That's our Sam," Daniel replied, his face creasing into a smile.

"Yeah. Through and through."

"Did you get any sleep last night?" Daniel asked, noting the fatigued bruises that shadowed the older man's eyes.

"Not sure. Might've dozed here and there. Didn't really want to… well, anyway. Don't think so."

Daniel nodded, understanding fully. "Yeah, neither did we. You hungry?"

Jack shook his head, "Not really. Right now I'm too tired to be hungry. I'm gonna go rearrange my schedule for this morning then catch a couple of hours in my rack."

"That sounds like an excellent idea, O'Neill. Perhaps I could go and sit with Colonel Carter for a while."

"I'm sure she'd like that. She's sleeping now. Doc said to expect her to do a lot of that for the next couple of days."

"Then I shall endeavor to be there when she awakens again."

"Thanks T. Thank you both. I know I haven't been the easiest guy to be around the last few days…"

Daniel interrupted him, "You have nothing to apologize for, Jack. We're your friends. We'll be your friends no matter what. Even when we argue."

"Yeah, well. Thanks all the same. I'll see you both later," Jack said, shoving his hands deep in his pockets and heading for his office. For the first time since Daniel and Teal'c had stumbled through the wormhole without Sam, he honestly felt as though everything was going to be okay. Now all they had to do was stop Ba'al and his weapon and compared to what he had just been through, that seemed like a piece of cake.

TBC…


	13. Chapter Thirteen

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Thirteen**

Feeling as though she was swimming through layers of wool and cotton, Sam slowly fought her way through the cloying fatigue to crack open her eyes. Down in the infirmary, so many hundreds of feet below the surface, she couldn't be sure if it was day or night or even how long she'd been sleeping. The lingering fuzziness suggested she either had a head injury or had been given some sort of pain killer, which had always had the effect of making her slightly loopy.

A soft groan escaped her as she attempted to shift to a slightly more comfortable position.

"Colonel Carter?" The soft baritone voice reached her ears and Sam was intensely relieved to hear it.

"Teal'c."

"Yes. Are you in pain, Colonel Carter?"

"Just… a bit sore."

"Shall I send for Doctor Brightman?"

"Nah. She'll just want to gimme drugs…" Sam rolled her head slightly to get a better look at her teammate. His normally impassive eyes were shadowed, and Sam thought for a moment he looked all of his 130 plus years.

"You doin' okay?" Sam asked quietly, surprised at the haunted look that crossed Teal'c's face. "Teal'c?"

"I am well, Colonel Carter."

"You sure?"

"Indeed."

" 'Kay. Where're the guys?"

"I believe O'Neill was going to attempt sleep before tending to his duties. He wanted me to tell you he would be here as soon as he was able. Daniel Jackson should return momentarily, he was procuring lunch for us."

The words were no more out of his mouth, than Daniel opened the door to Sam's room slightly, poking a disheveled head through the opening.

"Teal'c, I got meat loaf and…" Daniel began, whispering under his breath before catching Sam's eye and stopping cold.

"Hey, Daniel."

For a moment, Daniel simply stood half in, half out of the doorway looking at her. Two days ago, after seeing her struck down by a Jaffa staff weapon, he would have sworn he would never see her alive and whole again. Now here she was, wounded but very much alive and for that Daniel would be eternally grateful.

"Hey, Sam," Daniel said quietly, easing himself the rest of the way into the room to stand at her bedside. Reaching down, he lifted Sam's hand to cradle it gently between his own. "How ya feelin'?"

"Tired. Sore. Otherwise, I'm fine."

"Sam, you'd say that if your arm was broken and you'd just walked ten miles in the rain uphill to get to the 'gate and back home." Daniel said, his old, familiar joke bringing a smile to Sam's face.

"Yeah. What about you? You okay?"

"Yeah, Sam. I'm fine. Fine," Daniel replied, but just as with Teal'c, Sam could sense an undercurrent of sadness in her friend.

"You sure?"

"I'm sure. We're all fine. Just a bit worried about you, is all."

Sam rolled her eyes. "Don't worry about me. Got my guys… pull my six outta trouble," She said lightly, but the sincerity in her voice ran deep and they all knew it.

"Yeah, well… Jack kinda helped with that one this time."

"Jack…? I don't remember… he was…?"

"Yeah, led the mission himself. Way I heard it, Reynolds pretty much told him there was no one better to lead the team than Jack, and so there he was. Out in the field like he hadn't spent a day behind that desk."

Sam smiled, "Sorry I missed it. Tell me 'bout it later?"

"Will do, will do. You need anything?"

Sam shook her head slightly. "Jus' so tired," She slurred, her eyes already beginning to droop.

Daniel reached up, laying his hand gently on Sam's hair. "Go on back to sleep."

" 'Kay," Came the drowsy response as Sam allowed her eyes to drift closed.

Daniel leaned down, placing a brotherly kiss on Sam's forehead, lingering for a moment before speaking softly. "Thank you, Sam."

Sam's eyes opened a tiny fraction, "For wha'?"

"Surviving." Daniel whispered, his voice cracking faintly.

Sam's mouth creased into a small smile. "Got lots 'o good reasons to," she replied as sleep claimed her once again.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Jack awakened from his nap feeling better than he had in several days, the pall of Sam's capture finally falling away, removing the boulder he had been carrying on his shoulders. Now he had to deal with the military decisions resulting from the discovery of Ba'al's fortress. Colonel Reynolds had drawn up a solid battle plan for attacking the structure and destroying the weapon inside, but Jack was still uneasy with the casualty projections and was looking for any way to improve his team's odds.

Sitting at his laptop, the battle plan displayed on the screen, Jack went over the numbers and scenarios time and again, but no matter how he worked it up, the result was still the same; five to fifteen percent casualties, mainly from the first wave through the 'gate who would undoubtedly meet the fiercest resistance from the Jaffa they expected to be covering it. Ba'al and his Jaffa weren't stupid, they had to know the SGC would be back and would take steps to prepare a staunch defense of the Stargate.

After two hours of staring at a computer screen he decided he needed a break. Jack closed the laptop and stood, rolling and stretching is aching back and shoulders. There had to be a way around those odds, but he reasoned that maybe he was just too tired to see it right now. Besides, another set of eyes might lend some inspiration and Jack had at his disposal one of the best tacticians he had ever known, Teal'c. And he knew just where he would find the big Jaffa.

Entering the infirmary, Jack immediately turned toward the ICU, but as he drew closer noticed the lights were off in the small ward and the bed empty. His heart began racing in his chest as he took in the sight of Sam's empty bed, fear causing sweat to break out on his brow.

"Hey Jack, we're over here."

O'Neill spun around hurriedly toward the voice that had called out to him. His terror must have shown somewhat on his face and Daniel stood from the chair he had been sitting in to walk toward the General.

"Hey, you okay?"

Jack ran his eyes over Daniel's shoulder, taking in Sam sitting propped up in a regular hospital bed, devoid of all the wires and tubes with the exception of one IV. Looking tired, but certainly better than she had that morning, Jack breathed a sigh of relief.

Pasting what he hoped was a convincing smile on his face, Jack replied, "Yeah, yeah. Fine. Just lookin' for our patient there."

"Doctor Brightman moved her out here just a little while ago. She's still pretty wiped out, but already making noise about wanting to go home."

Jack stepped around Daniel and made his way to Sam's bedside. "Hey, how ya feelin'?"

"Ridiculously tired. You'd think after all that sleep the last couple of days I wouldn't still be, but…"

"Been there, done that. I'm sure the Doc'll have you up and outta here just as soon as she can."

"Yeah, Sam. Take advantage of it while you can. You never know how long it might be before you get another chance just to laze around in bed for days on end," Daniel teased.

Sam smiled at the sentiment. "Well, you know me. Can't hardly sit still most of the time, but right now I'm not sure I could stand up if I wanted to."

Jack pulled up a chair and lowered himself into it, never taking his eyes of Sam's face. Even with her illness and exhaustion lining her features, he didn't think she had ever looked more beautiful. Jack didn't realize how long they had been sitting there in silence until Daniel cleared his throat.

"Ah, so I'm gonna go… catch up on…. stuff. I'll see you both later."

Sam and Jack watched him go, then turned to each other. "Subtle," they said in unison before breaking out into smiles.

"So, really. How're you feeling?"

Sam bit her lip. "Honestly? Like the wrong end of a train wreck."

Jack nodded. "I figured."

"What about you?"

Jack looked up, surprise written across his face. "Who, me? I'm fine, really."

"Uh huh."

"What?"

"When was the last time you got a full night's sleep?"

"Ah…. well, must've been…." Jack paused, realizing it must have been before Sam left on her last mission. Before his life had been turned upside down.

"That's what I thought. Why don't you go home tonight? Get some sleep in a real bed."

"Can't," Jack replied simply.

"Why not?" Sam asked softly. "You know you hate sleeping on base."

"I know."

"So…"

"It's just…" Jack began before breaking off, unsure that he really wanted to have this conversation here and now.

"Jack, hey…"

O'Neill felt as though his emotions must have been written in permanent marker on his forehead, as easily as Sam seemed to read him. Over the course of the preceeding days, he had been on an emotional roller coaster and now that it had pulled into the station and stopped he had no desire to get in line and ride it again. And talking about anything deeper than sleep right now would definitely pull all of those emotions back out of their hiding places; he had been doing more than enough of that lately.

Sensing his unease, and knowing Jack O'Neill as well as she did, Sam answered for him. "It's okay, I think I can guess. I'm fine, really. You don't need to babysit. Go home, Jack. Get some descent sleep. At least one of us should."

"Yeah, well, I'll think about it. I've got this plan of Reynolds' to go over and a bunch of other stuff to work on. Might be better if I just stay here anyway…"

"What plan?"

"The one where we go back and blow Ba'al's little temple straight to hell and hopefully take that weapon with it."

"Oh. That plan."

"Yeah."

"You're worried."

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"The strategy is solid, it's the casualty projections that I don't like. Actually, I was hoping to run into Teal'c down here, get him to take a look. Maybe he can help me improve those numbers." Jack stole a glance at Sam's face and could practically see the wheels beginning to spin in her head.

"Don't get any ideas, there, Colonel. You're outta this one until the Doc says otherwise."

"But if you just get me my…"

"Damn it, Sam, I mean it!" Jack retorted, more sharply than he had intended, and immediately regretted it. He sighed, dropping his eyes to stare at his hands. "Sorry. That was a bit over the top, wasn't it?"

"S'okay. Really."

"No, no it's not. And I will need your help on this one, just not yet, okay? Not yet. I mean, Christ… just last night…"

"I know. I'm sorry," Sam said softly, reaching out to grasp Jack's hand. "Sorry I put you through all of that."

"Just glad it's over."

"Yeah. Join the club."

Jack looked up in time to see a shadow of distress flit across Sam's face. Squeezing her hand to get her attention, Jack mustered his courage. "I'm here. If you need….whatever. You know that, right?"

"I know."

"Okay, just so we've got that straight."

Feeling her strength beginning to wane, Sam slid further down into the bed, leaning her head back into the pillows. Her seemingly incesant need for sleep was beginning to wear on her, but she grudgingly accepted there was little she could do about it.

"Tired?" Jack asked.

"Yeah. Most of the time. Stay until I fall asleep?"

"Sure."

Jack knew he had dodged Sam's concern and acknowledged that he wouldn't be able to forever. But he also knew that what she had been through was nothing to take lightly. Sam was likely to bury herself in her lab just as soon as she was out of the infirmary and Jack knew if she was going to get past the horror of what had been done to her and move on she was going to have to face what had happened; and he was going to need to be there for her. No matter how much that may terrify him.

For now he was content to simply sit and hold her hand while she slept.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Jack wandered the halls of the SGC. He had reluctantly left Sam's side a few minutes ago and was now in search of Teal'c. When he hadn't turned up in the infirmary and was also absent from the commissary, Jack headed for the Jaffa's base quarters.

Knocking lightly on the cold metal door, Jack waited for an invitation.

"Come."

Twisting the handle and pushing open the door, Jack paused for a moment, allowing his eyes to adjust to the low candle light inside the room. It had always amazed him how Teal'c could manage to light so many candles inside his tiny quarters and avoid burning himself in the process.

"Hey, Teal'c. You busy?"

"I am not, O'Neill. My meditation has been difficult….and unsatisfying."

"Yeah? Well, maybe you're tryin' too hard, or something."

"Perhaps. How is Colonel Carter?"

"She's sleeping…again. This one really took it out of her. She seems so, I dunno. Weak. And that's not something you can usually say about Sam."

"Indeed. Colonel Carter is a formitable warrior. But even the strongest at times may reach the limits of their endurance."

"Yeah. And unfortunately, I'm not sure I'm going to be able to give enough time to get that back. We need her intel from inside that damned place, but I don't want to push her into reliving all of….that," Jack said, waving his arm absently over his head.

"Samantha has been through an ordeal that might break a lesser person. Do not underestimate her ability to overcome this. But she will not be able to do it alone."

"Yeah. I know that too. I'm not sure I'm cut out for all of that."

"Emotion is something a warrior strives to control. However, I believe in this case, it will be emotion that brings you both through these times and will make you stronger for it. But you must be willing to face it, just as Samantha must."

Jack nodded, dropping his eyes to study his boots.

"Fear not, O'Neill. You also will not be alone. Your friends will be there with you."

"Thanks, T. Really."

"Was there another purpose for your visit, O'Neill? Or did you come to simply….shoot the breeze?"

" 'Shoot the breeze'? Exactly where do you get this stuff, huh?" Jack asked, a grin splitting his face.

"Television. There is a wealth of Earth culture to be learned from watching 'Gilligan's Island'."

Jack was incredulous. "What? 'Gilligan's Island'? Oh no, no, no. See you've got it all wrong, T. You gotta borrow my Simpson's videos. Now that's real Earth culture. Anyway, um, actually there was another reason I stopped by. I was hoping you'd be willing to take a look at the strike plan Colonel Reynolds put together. There's got to be a way to decrease our casualty projections, but I just can't see it. I was hoping a fresh set of eyes…?"

"I would be happy to assist you."

"Great, good, okay. Let's go up to my office and see what we can come up with."

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Three hours later, they had finalized the assault plan. Jack still wasn't one hundred percent happy with the final result, but once Teal'c had reviewed outline and had pronounced it sound, he didn't have any choice but to go with it.

"Okay, if this is the best we can do…."

"I do not see any other alternatives, O'Neill. In order to mount an effective strike on the temple we must send three SG Teams and a UCAV through the 'gate. The UCAV will be able to launch its missiles before it is shot down, but it should give us time to get the teams through and into position.

"We can increase their chances of surviving the attack by utilizing our improved armor, but it will not eliminate the threat entirely. It is a risk, going into battle, but we must take it." Teal'c concluded.

"I know, I know. But I don't have to like it. Alright, we'll ask for volunteers, assemble the teams and start training in a couple of days. I want to be sure we've prepared for every possible scenario out there and I want to be ready to roll on this in fourteen days, max. That way if we screw this up, we've still got time to try again."

"You have a good team here, O'Neill. They will not fail."

"I hope you're right, Teal'c. If this thing is half as powerful as they made it sound, we won't stand a chance against it if they try to use it on us." Jack sat back in his chair, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. "Well, let me send a message out to all the team leaders and get this thing going."

"I would like to be your first volunteer, O'Neill."

"Kinda figured you would. They're going to need you on this one."

Teal'c inclined his head in response.

"Do you intend on returning to the infirmary tonight, O'Neill?"

"Yeah, just as soon as I finish up here. At least until Sam and the Doc kick me out."

"Has Colonel Carter indicated she did not desire your presence?"

"No, more like wants me to get some sleep in a real bed and not my rack or one of the infirmary chairs."

"I see. Do you believe you would sleep any better in your home?"

"Not really, no. It's just….too far away, ya know?"

"I do." Teal'c rose from his chair. "I shall see you in the infirmary then, O'Neill."

"Yeah, tell Sam I'll be down there shortly. Just let me get this out and close up shop here."

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Sam jerked awake sometime in the early hours of the morning, the remnants of the nightmare clinging to her awareness. As with many of the night terrors she sometimes suffered from, the dream was vivid, leaving her with her heart pounding in her ears and her breaths coming in short pants. This time what she could remember was running, seemingly in slow motion, through the endless corridors of the temple on -035. Chased by faceless figures shouting at her to stop.

Easing herself back down onto the pillows, Sam squeezed her eyes closed, willing the nightmare to fade. Telling herself it was only a dream. A soft voice from the bed to her right drew her attention.

"Hey."

"Jack?"

"Yeah."

"Thought you were going to go home and get some sleep."

Sam could just make him out in the bed next to her as he casually shrugged a shoulder. "Yeah, well, I did try. Gave up 'bout an hour ago. Came back here." Jack pushed the blanket off his legs and sat up.

"Ya know, people are going to talk if you keep sleeping in your uniform, General."

Jack smiled, looking down at his wrinkled shirt and trousers. "Yeah, well." Jack's expression faded as he gazed at Sam. "Wanna talk about it?"

"What?"

Jack cocked his head slightly, an indication that she wasn't fooling him for a moment. A few minutes earlier, awakened by Sam's restless thrashing in the bed next to him, Jack had watched helplessly as she struggled with her dreams. He had been about to get up and wake her when her eyes had come open.

"Not tonight, okay?" Sam pleaded quietly. The dream was still too close, too real. She wasn't ready yet to deal with it.

"Okay." Jack slid down off the bed, pulled up the chair between them and sat down.

Sam rolled slowly onto her side to face him. "I just…can't. Not yet…"

"You don't need to explain yourself to me. Believe me. I know…." Jack trailed off.

Sam extended a hand and Jack automatically reached out to take it. "Stay with me tonight?" She whispered, the terror of the dream still haunting her. She hated how needy she sounded, but couldn't help herself.

"No place else I'd wanna be," Jack replied easily. "Go on back to sleep Sam."

Nodding, Sam allowed her eyes to slide closed, her breathing evening out as she slowly relaxed. Jack remained sitting in the cold, hard chair, holding Sam's hand, guardian against the dreams and protector against an uncertain future.

TBC…


	14. Chapter Fourteen

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Fourteen**

Word of Sam's capture and subsequent escape had spread rapidly throughout the SGC and now that she was well on her way to recovery, the tale of what had happened on -035 was quickly becoming a full blown SG-1 legend. In a command like the SGC, 'hero' was a term not often used when describing one of their own, but Sam and SG-1 came as close to it as anyone on base.

As Daniel entered the commissary to refill his coffee mug, the hushed conversations that reached his ears were more often than not concerned with Sam. The gossip was something he had come to expect, even if he wasn't all that comfortable with being the subject of it. But this time it was different, the tone of the talk held more awe than normal. SG-1's escapades often bordered on the fantastic, but it was somewhat unusual that a member of the team found themselves captured alone, having to rely solely on his or her own grit and determination to escape.

This time, rather than being embarrassed, Daniel found himself feeling more than a little bit proud of Sam and her ability to get herself out of a harrowing situation on her own. He had always known Sam was a survivor, but what he hadn't realized was just how much her toughness had inspired other members of the SGC. When he overheard one table describing her as a 'kick ass officer with a spine of solid titanium', he found himself silently agreeing wholeheartedly.

It had been two days since Sam had finally awakened from her fever and the Doc had agreed to let her go home later that afternoon. While she seemed fine, Daniel couldn't help but worry that she was being allowed to leave too soon. Knowing that Sam would accuse him of being a mother hen, Daniel had kept his reservations to himself. It wasn't as though Sam was alone any longer, after all. He suspected that Jack would be on hand should she need anything.

Walking back toward his lab, Daniel found his mind wandering back over the last few days, wondering if perhaps they had all been more profoundly affected than they had been willing to admit. He had struggled with his own guilt over leaving Sam behind, his rational mind, knowing it had been the right thing to do at the time, warring with the emotional part of him that had grieved over the decision. He knew he wasn't alone. Jack and Teal'c had both been typically tight lipped anytime he had attempted to bring up the subject, but they had both been unusually quiet in general.

Jack had buried himself in his work, taking time out only to visit Sam in the infirmary or spend a couple of minutes scarfing down a meal from the dining hall. Daniel was pretty sure he hadn't left the base for more than a few hours in the last four or five days. Not that the archaeologist blamed him. If their roles had been reversed, and it was someone he loved, he wouldn't have wanted to leave either.

Teal'c had been nearly as bad. When he wasn't spending time going over the strike plans and training schedule with Jack and Colonel Reynolds, he was most often working out in the base gym or meditating in his quarters. Daniel hadn't seen Teal'c meditate so much since Shau'nak had died, and had been looking for an excuse to call the big Jaffa on it.

But so far his not so subtle inquiries had been firmly but politely deflected. He knew that if he was carrying around this much guilt, Teal'c was likely feeling it even more so. The former First Prime had spent his lifetime living by a code that didn't allow for leaving comrades behind during battle. An action he had been forced into by circumstances well out of his control, to be sure, but that fact likely made it even harder to live with.

It wasn't as though they hadn't had to make difficult decisions in the past; decisions that could have easily resulted in their deaths several times over. But over time, they had come to be more than just a team. Perhaps more than family, their friendship and common experiences binding them closer than blood, and this time one of them had nearly been sacrificed. All for the greater good.

_Greater good._ Daniel thought. _What a load of shit. The 'greater good' doesn't mean squat if you have to give up your soul for it._

Glancing down at his watch, Daniel noted the time and began packing up for the evening. He had promised Sam he would give her a hand packing up her laptop and a few other things from her lab to take home with her. With a week convalescent leave, Sam wanted to have something to keep her occupied while she recovered at home. Daniel suspected neither Jack nor the Doc knew anything about the work going home with her, but he wasn't about to clue them in. What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them, he reasoned.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Sam leaned her head against the cool window of Jack's truck, the side streets of Colorado Springs a blur running past in the dusky evening light. She was relieved to be out of the infirmary and out of the mountain, breathing fresh air again for the first time in too many days. But her injuries and illness had left her feeling weaker than she could ever remember. Just the walk from the infirmary to the parking lot had left her shaking with fatigue.

Jack had been quietly supportive, taking her arm once they had cleared security and were away from the facility. He knew how important image could be, especially for those in command positions; if their roles had been reversed he would have wanted to make it out of the building under his own steam and gave Sam the same courtesy.

Once in the truck and on their way out of the main gates, Jack had reached out to lay a hand on Sam's leg, the simple gesture wasn't lost on her. Jack O'Neill had never been an overly touchy person, but over the last few days he had seemed to take any excuse to touch her, not that she minded. The tangible sensation of Jack's hand as it stroked her leg gave Sam a feeling of safety and security that she was finding it hard to go without.

Sam groggily realized she must have fallen asleep at some point during the drive when she opened her eyes and realized they had stopped moving.

"Hey, we there already?"

"Yep. Door to door service, ma'am," Jack said nonchalantly as he exited the cab and made his way around the truck just as Sam was stepping out and onto the sidewalk. Her knees went to water as soon as she moved to stand up and Sam leaned against the doorframe and closed her eyes for a moment as the world spun crazily around her. Jack snaked an arm around hers, keeping her steady as the dizziness receded. Opening her eyes, Sam met Jack's concerned gaze.

"I'm okay. Too much enforced rest lately. Doctor Brightman said to expect it."

"Uh huh. Well, let's get you inside and into bed."

When Sam's eyebrows rose, Jack caught the expression and realized what he'd said.

"That's not what I meant. Not that I don't….well… but not right now, at least. I mean… ah hell."

Sam chuckled at his flustered speech and decided to let Jack off the hook. "I know. Besides, I think doing anything more exiting than stretching out on the couch and watching TV right now just might kill me."

That stopped Jack cold and he gripped her arm tightly in response. "Don't."

"What? What did I…?"

"Not even as a joke, Sam."

Sam studied him, taking in the serious set to his mouth and the grave look in his eyes. "I'm sorry. I didn't think. It's just….the whole thing seems so surreal. Like it happened to someone else," Sam stopped and blew out a breath. "I guess I'm not making a lot of sense."

"No, you're making perfect sense. I just …just, please. Don't." Jack eased his rigid grip on Sam's arm, sliding his hand up to encircle her shoulders and pull her into a gentle embrace. Sam allowed herself to sink into his arms, feeling the warmth and strength in them as she turned to rest her head on his shoulder, her nose pressed into his neck.

"I'm sorry," Sam whispered.

"Nothin' to be sorry for. C'mon. Let's get you inside before the neighbors start talking."

Sam nodded wearily, pulling away slightly to fish her keys out of her pocket and hand them over. Jack reached around her to grab her duffle out from the rear seat, then moved his free arm to wrap securely around Sam's waist as they made their way up the walk.

Flipping on the foyer lights, Jack steered Sam toward the living room, easing her down onto the sofa before dropping her duffle on the floor next to her. Sam leaned over, attempting to untie her shoes, wincing as the burn on her leg pulled painfully.

"Here, let me," Jack said, sitting down and pulling her legs up and onto his lap. Easing her shoes off, he set about massaging the soles of her feet gently, feeling the tension flow out of them as he worked.

Sam sighed blissfully. "You're hired."

"Really?"

Sam chuckled warmly. "Oh yeah, definitely. You interested?"

"Sure. If I've got this to fall back on, I won't need that 'General' gig anymore."

"Well, job's yours for as long as you want it."

"Sweet." Jack replied, a genuine grin splitting his face. "As long as I want it, huh?"

"Ya sure you betcha."

Jack smirked at the expression. "Good to know I've got job security."

Sam smiled, leaning her head back onto the arm of the couch and allowing her eyes to drift closed. They sat, Sam dozing lightly, Jack rubbing her feet as the evening worn on, painting the room in the orange glow of sunset. Jack was tempted to pick Sam up and put her to bed, but she needed to eat at least as much as she needed sleep and so he eased himself out from under her legs and headed for the kitchen.

He had been over for dinner a handful of times in the last few weeks and felt sure he could find his way around Sam's kitchen well enough to find something that would work for dinner. Opening cupboards, Jack pulled out a package of pasta and a jar of Vodka marinara sauce he knew to be one of Sam's favorites and set about preparing the meal.

Sam woke to the smell garlic and pasta sauce and pulled her eyes open. The short nap had done her some good and she felt a bit steadier than she had when she had first arrived at home. Sitting up gingerly, her abused body stiff and sore, Sam put her feet down and slowly stood. Her vision tunneled slightly, but cleared after a few moments and she made her way toward the kitchen.

The sight of Jack O'Neill in her kitchen standing over a pot of boiling water, a pasta fork in one hand and a beer in the other was one Sam never thought to see as long as she lived. It brought a smile to her face.

"Hey, there. Whatcha doin'?"

Jack whipped his head around, looking like a boy who'd been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"Hey. Didn't mean to wake you. I ah…thought dinner might be a good idea. You hungry?"

"Actually, I think I am. Smells great in here," Sam said as she pulled up a nearby barstool and lowered herself onto it, wincing slightly.

Jack noted the look. " 'Bout time for more happy pills?"

Sam grimaced at the thought. "I really hate taking those things. Makes me feel… fuzzy. Like I'm a step off from everyone else."

"Yeah, don't much like 'em myself," Jack sympathized. "Well, how about we get some dinner into you first, see how you feel after that?"

"Deal."

Jack pulled down two plates, portioning out the pasta and sauce and toasted garlic bread onto each, placing one in front of Sam and sitting down next to her.

She took a bite, savoring the flavor. "Mmm. This is really good. One of my favorites."

Jack stole a glance at her. "Yeah. I know."

Sam smiled. "Thank you."

"Anytime, ma'am. Anytime."

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Sam managed to make it until nearly 9 pm before finally deciding she needed to give in to her still healing body and head off to bed.

"You don't have to stay here, really. I'm fine. Go ahead on home. I'll be okay on my own."

Jack squinted his eyes, looking decidedly uncomfortable. He hadn't wanted to admit to Sam that he'd been almost completely unable to sleep unless it was when she was nearby. The acknowledgment seemed too much like admitting a weakness, but it was the truth. He didn't think he'd be able to rest even in his own bed right now unless Sam was right there with him.

Sam watched the play of emotions run across Jack's face and was surprised to discover she could read them almost as well as her father's, another man who's feelings were well hidden unless you knew where to look.

"You're still not sleeping are you?"

Jack was incredulous. "Exactly how do you do that anyway?"

"Years of practice reading someone a lot better at hiding things than you are. Come on, the bed's big enough for both of us."

Now it was Jack's turn to raise a suggestive eyebrow.

"You know what I meant. Don't pretend you didn't. Just for sleeping. Maybe this way we both can get some sleep."

Jack studied her, the fatigue that left dark bruises beneath her eyes, the weary set of her shoulders, and realized she was probably right. "Okay, but no funny business."

Sam smirked before pushing herself slowly to her feet and leading the way down the hall toward her bedroom. Pulling open a drawer in her bureau, she produced a t-shirt and pair of shorts she was reasonably sure would fit Jack and extended them toward him.

"Carter, do I want to know where these came from?"

"Don't worry, they're Dad's. I keep some stuff here for him for when he… well, when he used to be able to visit."

"Ah, well then, if it's good enough for Dad." Jack smiled, heading into the bathroom to change. By the time he had finished a few minutes later and re-entered the bedroom Sam was already in bed and seemed to be asleep. Carefully climbing in next to her, Jack reached over and turned out the light on the bedside table, then rolled over onto his side to simply look at her.

The moonlight spilled in through the sheer curtains at the windows, lighting Sam from behind in an ethereal glow that took his breath away. Jack reached out to caress her cheek with the palm of his hand, reveling in the softness of her skin that seemed in such sharp contrast to the toughness of her spirit. Leaning in closer he placed a light kiss on her lips and Sam stirred slightly at the contact, opening her eyes.

"G'wan back to sleep. I'll see you in the morning."

Sam simply looked at him for a moment before leaning in to return his kiss, at first lightly but then deepening it to become more passionate, his lips parting slightly to admit her questing tongue.

After several moments of increasing intensity, Jack reluctantly broke away, "I don't think you're going to be able to go much farther here."

Sam sighed deeply, resting her forehead on Jack's. "Yeah, I know. I'm sorry."

"You keep saying that."

"What?"

" 'Sorry'. You've got nothing to be sorry for. Don't worry, this'll still be here when you're ready for it."

Sam nodded silently, easing herself back onto her pillow. Jack reached out to stroke her face and Sam closed her eyes, leaning into the soothing touch.

"Thank you, Sam."

Opening her eyes she could see the tenderness reflected back through the warm brown pools of Jack's gaze. "What for?"

"Keeping your promise."

Sam paused for a moment, grasping for the meaning behind Jack's cryptic statement, then suddenly remembered the dinner conversation weeks before.

"Always," She replied simply, as Jack rolled over onto his back, opening his arms for her. Sam immediately snuggled closer, pillowing her head on his shoulder and wrapping an arm around his chest, sinking into the warm embrace of sleep.

TBC...


	15. Chapter Fifteen

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Fifteen**

The dreams never seemed to be far over the last few nights, always lurking around a dark corner of her mind; tonight was no exception. Sam found herself back in the dank interrogation room, her captors standing over her, ready with a blow when she didn't give them what they wanted, or sometimes when they simply wanted something to beat on. She struggled to maintain her military bearing, refusing to allow them to break her.

The questions came, rapid fire. "Where are your companions? How many are hiding among the trees? What are the codes that will open your defensive iris?"

Always her answer was the same. "Carter, Samantha. Lieutenant Colonel. 43-412-6775-320. 12-29-68."

Unexpectedly her dream shifted and Jack was there with her, encouraging her, promising her he would come for her and not to give up. She drew strength from his presence, bolstering her flagging will and filling her with a stalwart resolve. They wouldn't break her. They wouldn't force her into a betrayal of everything she stood for, everything the code by which she lived her life demanded.

In the waking world, Jack had been roused by Sam's jerky movements and mumbled words that at first he couldn't make out. When he realized she was reciting her name, rank, service number, and date of birth his heart broke. As he listened to her litany repeated time and again his chest tightened in anger and anguish. He was accustomed to being in control, able to influence any given situation, generally through force of his considerable will.

But this, an enemy that stole in like a thief in the night, an enemy against which he had limited skills, he didn't know how to deal with it. The feeling of impotence was nearly overwhelming, until finally he reacted in the only way he knew how. Reaching out, he gently gathered Sam close, running his hands soothingly through her hair.

"C'mon, wake up for me Dorothy. It's okay. You're safe now. You're home. It's over, it's all over."

Sam awoke with a start, disoriented from clinging images of her dream that dug like icy tendrils around her heart. As awareness came flooding back, she attempted to push herself out of Jack's arms, embarrassed at the tears that gathered in her eyes, but he merely tightened his hold, right now needing it at least as much as she did.

"Jack?"

"I'm right here."

"I'm okay…" Sam said shakily, her need to remain strong in front of him still running as deep as ever.

"Well, I'm not, so just… stay put, okay?"

Nothing else he could have said would have worked more completely, and Sam sank into Jack's embrace, wrapping her arms securely around him, anchoring them both. He continued his rhythmic stroking of his fingers through her silken hair as her heart rate gradually slowed and became more regular. She hated the dreams, hated how weak they made her feel and her initial instinct to cover the weakness of her tears had been one born of an upbringing and education that rewarded control over her emotions. _Carters never cry. Carters are always strong._ Wasn't that what her father had always taught her?

It was as though he could practically hear what she was thinking as Jack watched Sam struggle for control. But that course of total, uncompromising, rigid command over emotion could only lead to a life of loneliness and depression, eventually pushing everyone else away. He knew it only too well and he would be damned if he allowed Sam to travel that same path.

"Don't, Sam."

"What?" She asked, startled by his voice.

"Don't do this. It's okay."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Sam whispered, knowing it was a lie. Knowing Jack knew it too.

"Don't do this," he repeated. "You hate the dreams, but you live with them. Eventually you learn to deal with them. And if you're really lucky, you find someone you can share them with."

Sam wasn't sure if they were talking about just her any longer, and knew that what Jack said was truth. But a truth she wasn't sure she could yet accept. The fact that he had mentioned it at all spoke volumes about how deep Jack's own feelings ran; he who used words so sparingly, but meant every word he uttered.

"I… I'm not sure I can…" Sam's voice was a harsh whisper. She knew that once the bands of control were loosened she might never be able to put them back into place again. And once that happened, everything might change forever. She couldn't risk it.

Jack simply nodded in reply. "If you change your mind…."

"I know. And you have no idea how good that makes me feel."

"Okay," Jack replied, as Sam curled into his side, her head resting comfortably on his shoulder, willing the remaining whispers of her nightmare to the furthest corners of her mind as she sank back into sleep. For now he resigned himself to allowing her to keep what had happened to herself, but if the frequency of her night terrors was any indication, he might not be able to let it go on for much longer.

He couldn't stand the sight of Sam in distress, the fear written so clearly across her features, and knew that one day soon he was going to have to force the issue with her. Force her to relive what had happened so that she could move past it. It was hardly something he was looking forward to, but acknowledged the necessity.

But for now there was nothing left to do but sleep and so surrendered himself to it, Sam's soft breaths a lullaby easing him into slumber.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The news of the Tau'ri's escape spread like wildfire through the Jaffa ranks, none of them envying the Commander's position as he reported to Lord Ba'al.

"I have no excuse, My Lord. We are not worthy of your greatness. We have failed you, My Lord," he groveled piteously, hoping that his boot licking might just save his life.

The reaction was hardly what he'd expected of his Master. Lord Ba'al was quietly introspective for several minutes, leaving his Commander to sweat in front of the communications array. Instead of thundering away at him, when he did speak, Lord Ba'al's voice was quiet. The kind of quiet that usually ended up killing someone.

"Yes, you have indeed failed me. And your failure shall not go unpunished. But this may yet be turned to our advantage. We needed a practical test of this weapon's capabilities on a small scale and we now have that opportunity. Prepare for an assault. The Tau'ri know we are here and we must assume they know of our plans, since your carelessness with your prisoner may well have extended to your tongues as well. Ensure the weapon is prepared. When the Tau'ri attack they won't be expecting us to use it… yes, this could be very advantageous indeed," Ba'al continued almost to himself.

"Prepare your troops well, Jo'nack, and you might yet live to serve this ship again. The Tau'ri will attack through the Chappa'ai, concentrate your forces there. Expect that they will land forces on the planet and will assault the main complex. It will be then that we demonstrate the true power of this formidable weapon."

"Yes, My Lord. It will be as you command."

"And Jo'nack, allow one of them to live. News of our triumph must be carried back to Earth. I want O'Neill to know the full extent of his failure."

"Yes, My Lord," Jo'nack replied, the relief at his continued survival causing his knees to shake slightly. Never before had he seen someone fail the Master and live. His only thought was that he was not intended to survive the coming battle. But he could accept that as his fate and in the end his triumph, even in death, would assure the continued honor of his family and his remaining Jaffa.

As the communications device winked off, Jo'nack turned to the Jaffa standing behind him.

"Go, assemble your men. We shall lay in wait for the Tau'ri. This time we shall not fail our Master!"

Snapping smartly to attention and bringing sharp fists up to their chests, the Jaffa turned and hurried from the room. The time for their redemption was at hand.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The week was crawling slowly by and to Sam it felt as though seven days had been extended to a month. Enforced rest wasn't something she had ever done well, and this was no exception. If not for her nagging fatigue, she would have shrugged off the Doctor's orders and continued to work her customary ten to twelve hours, albeit from home and not her lab. As it was, she was able to get through about six before she needed to take a break from her laptop keyboard and stretch out on the couch. Besides, if Jack had suspected she was working as much as she was, he'd likely have her back in the infirmary faster than she could say naquada reactor.

But it was now finally Thursday, and if Sam could just get through the next three days she'd be back on base for a physical and hopefully a return to duty. The injury to her leg was healing nicely and she hoped wouldn't leave much scarring. All in all, she was cautiously pleased with her recovery and was hoping Doctor Brightman could be convinced to return her to full active duty.

Jack would be another matter entirely. Ever since she'd come home he'd been spending most of his off time at her place, only returning home when absolutely necessary. Sam was somewhat surprised to discover his presence, rather than feeling claustrophobic, was instead warm and comfortable. His solid presence a bastion in the chaos that seemed to dominate the rest of her life. The dreams that had plagued her sleep since she had first awakened in the infirmary had been her constant companions and could be counted on to wake her at least once each night. Oddly she'd begun to become accustomed to the interruption and she suspected it was her continued struggle with the dreams that kept Jack there most nights.

When they had first begun dating, she'd been somewhat surprised at their relative restraint around each other. After years of sexual tension, she'd half expected them to fall into bed at the first opportunity. But as the days stretched on, she realized that what she felt for Jack ran much deeper than simple sex. There was nothing even remotely simple about their relationship. After what had happened to her on -035 things had become even more complex. Sam drew on Jack's strength more than she had ever relied upon anyone since her mother died. She had come to depend upon his stalwart presence each night, holding her close as the night terrors left her feeling sick and shaken. It was a need that at first she had resented as a form of weakness she felt she couldn't allow herself, but now was grudgingly coming to accept. She needed Jack, in a way she had never needed anyone. The thought scared her to death.

Sam had considered talking with Jack about all of it, her experiences on -035, her fears since returning, her need of him. She knew that her unwillingness to discuss what had happened worried him, and she acknowledged that she wasn't going to be able to keep from talking about it for much longer. She even realized, somewhere deep down, that if she faced what happened, she might actually begin to put it and the dreams behind her. But it wasn't going to be that simple. Opening up wasn't something she did willingly, a trait she knew she shared with Jack.

It had been gnawing at her, this incessant feeling that she had to face what happened, and not just through talking. What began as a niggling feeling in the back of her mind had blossomed into an all out assault, leaving her feeling as though she might break apart under the attack, and it left her confused and frustrated. It wasn't as though this was the first time she'd be captured or injured in the line of duty. Why was this so different? What had changed that made this time so difficult to simply put behind her? She was no stranger to the depression or night mares following such a difficult mission, but never before had it been so pervasive, dominating nearly her every waking and sleeping thought.

Shaking her head to clear the unanswerable questions, Sam knew one thing for certain, if she didn't get back to -035 and take out that weapon herself, she just might not be able to live with it. Ever. She knew of the plans to attack the temple and knew the jump off date was rapidly approaching. But in order to convince Jack she needed to go along, she was going to have to tell him all of it. Everything that had happened and everything she was feeling now, and hope that he understood enough to allow her to go.

Sam had been rehearsing the conversation over and over in her mind for the last couple of days and now that the week was drawing to a close, she knew her time was running short. She was going to have to talk to him and soon if she hoped to join to expeditionary force in time to be a part of this mission. But it was still early in the day, and Sam didn't expect Jack back from the mountain for several hours at least and so had just pulled open her laptop when her cell phone rang shrilly from the kitchen. Rising from her seat in the dining room, she picked up her phone, noting the digits as a cell number she recognized well she flipped it open.

"Carter."

"Colonel Carter, it is Teal'c."

"Teal'c, how are you?"

"I am well, and you?"

"Other than bored out of my mind most of the time, I'm fine. How're things at the SGC?"

"They are as you would expect."

Sam chuckled, "So, business as usual then?"

"Indeed." Teal'c was silent for a moment, not knowing human etiquette well, he was unsure how to frame the request that had caused him to pick up the phone initially. In the end, he opted for the direct approach, noting that more often than not with his friends from the SG-1 the method was most effective.

"Colonel Carter, I was hoping I could come by your home today."

"That would be great, I'd love some company."

"Shall I bring a meal, perhaps?"

"That sounds good, how about Chinese? We can make it a late lunch."

"Very well, I shall be there in an hour."

True to his word, just under an hour later Teal'c arrived on her doorstep, Chinese take out in hand. Welcoming him in, Sam broke out the plates and drinks and they enjoyed a meal of Szechwan Beef and General Tso's chicken while talking over the latest base gossip. Sam had discovered years earlier, much to her surprise, that Teal'c was unusually well plugged into the base grapevine. She had never considered herself one to take part in idle gossip, but it was nice to hear about the goings on at the SGC.

Sam gathered the empty cartons and dishes, depositing them in the kitchen before joining Teal'c in her living room. Anyone who hadn't known the Jaffa as long as she had wouldn't pick up on the subtle signs, but she had known him for over eight years and could tell there was something bothering him.

Sam folded herself onto the couch, eyeing her companion sitting across from her. Over the years she had come to regard Teal'c as one of her closest friends, closer in many respects than even Janet, when she had been alive. There were things that only another comrade would understand, and things that simply couldn't be shared with a commanding officer.

Daniel simply didn't have the background to understand the pressures she faced, but Teal'c's long service to Apophis lent him an uncanny insight and he seemed to implicitly understand, even when Sam didn't herself. His unerring intuition was at times unnerving, but when she was feeling at her lowest, as though no one could truly understand, there he was. Sometimes with a shoulder to cry on, other times with a simple look or gesture. Always it lifted her up, set her on her feet again, and they would carry on. She could let down her guard with him as she could with no one else, even Jack. Especially Jack.

"I wish to apologize, Colonel Carter."

The statement came from around a blind corner and was the last thing she expected to hear.

Sam stuttered before replying. "Ah…you… you what?"

"I owe you my apology."

"What the hell for?"

"I should not have abandoned you on P7X-035."

"Teal'c, you didn't abandon me, I ordered you to leave."

"I should have ensured that Daniel Jackson made it through the 'gate. Once that mission was accomplished, I should have returned for you."

Sam stared at her hands, clasped in her lap. She hadn't considered at the time how difficult her orders would be to carry out, she had only considered the danger to Earth and her duty to get their intelligence through the 'gate and into the hands of people who could neutralize that threat. It wasn't until much later, when she was alone in that dank cell, that she realized what effect that order was likely to have. And by then it was too late.

"Teal'c, you did as I ordered you. You did your duty, and I counted on that. I knew you would follow that order and I knew that meant leaving me behind. I'm not sorry about giving that order. I'd do it again, if I had to. And I know you'd follow it again, because that's who you are, Teal'c."

Teal'c inclined his head. "You are my sister in arms, Samantha. Among the Jaffa, that bond is something to be honored and protected. I do not believe I should have allowed your order to come between me and my duty to you."

Sam was utterly stunned. She hadn't thought it possible for Teal'c, a dedicated warrior with a devotion to duty that rivaled any she had ever seen, even her father's, to admit something of such magnitude. It was unthinkable, and rocked her down to her very soul.

"Teal'c, you can't mean that…"

"I can. I have sacrificed much to the cause of my people, to the cause of freedom. I am unsure that I can sacrifice so much ever again. You, Daniel Jackson, O'Neill, you are as much my family as Rya'c. I had a duty to protect my family as well as a duty to the Tau'ri. I failed in that duty."

Sam could feel Teal'c's eyes on her, waiting for her to say something. She drew in several deep breaths, attempting to calm herself.

"Teal'c, you can't think like that. One must always come before the other. The greater good always has to be considered before the good of one team or one individual."

"I have meditated on this for many hours. Many things are still unclear to me. But I am coming to believe that perhaps in this Daniel Jackson is correct. There can be no greater good than duty to those you care about."

Sam blew out a frustrated breath. She couldn't believe she was hearing this from Teal'c of all people. Daniel she expected, but not this. Teal'c had been the bedrock of SG-1 since the beginning and now that foundation was showing some cracks. She wasn't sure how to deal with it.

"So, what're you going to do now?" Sam asked quietly, afraid of the answer.

"I am unsure. I do not want to leave SG-1 or the Tau'ri, but I cannot change how I feel on this matter."

"Maybe if we just give it some time, when things aren't so…. close…"

Teal'c regarded his companion thoughtfully. O'Neill had come to him concerned that she had not yet spoken to anyone. Teal'c at first had thought his concern unwarranted, her reticence of late was not unexpected given her recent experiences, but it did seem unusual for the steadfast Colonel. Now that he was in her presence all he had done was unload his own problems upon her, and it shamed him. But it felt good to be able to confide in her, both as a friend and a comrade in arms.

"I am sorry, Colonel Carter. I should not have unburdened myself upon you."

Sam shook her head adamantly. "Teal'c, I'm glad you came to me. I'm glad you trust me enough to speak with me about this."

Teal'c inclined his head in agreement. "I do indeed trust you, with a great many things, including my life. Do I also hold such trust from you?"

"Of course. You don't need to ask that…" Sam replied immediately, confused that he would ever doubt her loyalty.

"Then would you not speak with me of P7X-035?"

Sam stopped cold, her mouth falling open. So, that was it. His real reason for visiting. "Jack sent you," Sam accused softly. "Didn't he?"

"O'Neill knows nothing of my intentions to visit here today, Colonel Carter."

"But he did talk with you, didn't he?"

"He has. But only out of concern for you."

Sam stood slowly, making her way to the double doors that lead to her back yard. Crossing her arms, she stood in front of them, leaning her head against the cool panes, watching her breath fog the glass. "I… I'm not sure I can."

"Would you feel more comfortable speaking with Daniel Jackson?"

"Somehow I doubt it, Teal'c. Daniel really doesn't understand… can't understand."

"Then one of the medical professionals at the SGC perhaps…"

Sam cut him off sharply. "Good God no. There's no way I'm going to have any of this wind up on my permanent record in any way, shape, or form."

"Is it not procedure, after such an incident, to speak with someone in that capacity?"

"Normally, yes. But after some of our… less than stellar experiences with people in the psychiatric profession over the years, Doctor Brightman agreed to let me work out on my own who I would talk with."

"And yet, you have spoken of this to no one."

"No," Sam acknowledged. "Not yet. I'm not sure why this is so hard this time. Why can't I just get over it already?" Sam huffed, exasperation coloring her voice.

"Perhaps it is not just this incident, Samantha. This is not the first time in recent months you have undergone something like this."

_Fifth. He means Fifth. God, something else better left alone. Buried down deep._ She had only spoken of it very briefly to O'Neill on the _Daniel Jackson_ as they journeyed back to Earth after Fifth had inexplicably released her. She still wasn't sure she trusted his motivations for any of that.

Teal'c came to stand behind her, reaching out a warm hand and placing it gently on her shoulder. She jumped slightly at the contact, tense with the memories that seemed to suffocate her at every turn.

"Come, sit."

Such an innocuous phrase, one she had heard hundreds of times before. But this time was different. This time it brought it all back, every blow, every hour spent in that dismal chair interrogated in what seemed to be an unending session of questions and pain. Sam was no longer in her own home, but back on -035, the Jaffa standing over her ready to mete out agony with a flick of their wrists. Jaffa just like Teal'c, standing over her. Commanding her to sit. Commanding her to betray her oath to the Air Force and the SGC.

The flashback hit her like a physical force, a blow that couldn't be prepared for or avoided. She couldn't imagine anything worse. It all came back, every moment of excruciating suffering that she had endured swept into her consciousness like a hot, unstoppable flood and it left her shaking and nauseated. Slowly the images receded from her mind and she dimly became aware of Teal'c gripping her shoulders tightly, attempting to steady her. Sam deliberately slowed her breathing, bringing herself under control.

"Samantha, are you well?"

"Teal'c?"

"I am here." He was shaken. Among the Jaffa, it was not unheard of for warriors to have waking visions of the horrors seen in battle. Some endured such things and became stronger for it; others were never the same, unable to ever function under fire again. He wasn't sure what had triggered her vision, but the rigidity in his team mate's body belied what had been happening, and for a moment he feared her collapse.

Gently taking her arm, Teal'c led Sam to the nearby couch and helped her to sit. The intensity of the visions was shocking, more so than the worst of her nightmares, as though she were literally living it over again. It was like she had ever left the temple and for a long horrifying moment, she wondered if she had indeed escaped at all. She clung to the powerful arms that supported her as she sat quaking, her eyes darting about the room in search of some hint of the subterfuge.

"Home?" Sam whispered, the fear coursing through her veins clenching her belly in response.

"Indeed."

"God… what the hell…"

"You saw the temple."

Sam lifted a shaking hand to her face. "Yeah."

"Has this happened before?"

"What? No…no. Jesus…. I could live with it never happening again."

Teal'c nodded then rose and made his way to the kitchen. Sam could hear the water in her sink run momentarily then Teal'c returned with a tall glass of water and extended it to her. She reached out, grasping the glass so tightly her knuckles were white with the effort. Sam sipped at the cool water, allowing it to soothe her arid throat.

"What's happening to me?"

"Your mind requires healing, the same as your body. Healing you have avoided thus far. Perhaps this is a sign you cannot ignore that need any longer."

Sam turned away, gazing forlornly out the window. She wanted to pull back from his supportive touch, wanted to divorce herself from the understanding look in his eyes. She cursed herself for her weakness as she felt the beginnings of tears stinging at the corners of her eyes. _Okay, so talk it out, huh? If this is the alternative... Well sure as hell can't be as bad._

When she began speaking it was in low tones that Teal'c had to strain to hear.

"I've never felt like this before. After Fifth I could just… put it away. If I didn't look at it, I could live with it. Get past it. But this time…. this time… it's like it's following me. Every time I close my eyes, it's there," Sam murmured brokenly, the admission wrung from her, painful to touch. "I got lucky with Fifth. If he hadn't decided to let me go I'd be…"

"You would be dead right now."

"Yeah."

"But it was not so on P7X-035. It was your own resourcefulness that enabled your escape. No one else."

"Yeah, well, I didn't feel all that resourceful at the time. Just desperate. For a while there I didn't think…"

"You did not believe you would survive."

Sam sighed deeply. "Yeah."

"Have we not been in situations where it seemed unlikely we would emerge with our lives?"

"I guess…but I was on my own this time, just like with Fifth. It never seemed so…. terrifying when you guys were there with me."

"And now you have twice faced that eventuality alone. Even for the strongest warrior there is no shame in admitting the fear that comes with such experiences."

"I guess. It just never seems…" Sam trailed off, unsure how to phrase what she was feeling to the Jaffa who hadn't know prejudice in the way she had experienced.

"Do you fear that some would consider this a weakness? Some sort of failing of yours?"

Sam smiled gently. "One of these days you won't be able to surprise me like this, Teal'c. I'm not sure what it's like with the Jaffa, but for women here on Earth, especially in commands like the SGC… it's hard. Hard because you feel like, no matter what you do, no matter how good you are, people are always looking for the chink in your armor. The time when you come up short. It's like I'm always proving myself."

"Even after all you have accomplished with the SGC?"

"Maybe even more so. I know it's cliché, but it's like I have a reputation to live up to now."

Teal'c inclined his head, understanding written across his features. He knew well the advantages and pitfalls of a strong reputation.

"I'm just…" Sam stopped, nearly choked on the word, she'd uttered it so infrequently. "afraid."

"Of what?"

"That it'll always feel like this. That I won't be able to get all the way back this time."

And now here it was, the heart of the matter. Fear could be an overwhelming adversary, weilding weapons that at times can scarcely be understood let alone combatted. Fear could rot away at a person's confidence or it could inspire incredible feats of strength in overcoming it's influence. Until now, Sam had always defeated the beast, rising above it to claim utter victory at times when it seemed as though no one, no matter how resilient could survive.

Teal'c considered his response carefully, knowing full well that he was treading on shifting ground. A soldier's confidence was a vital and ultimately fragile thing, one misstep could spell disaster, for Sam and the team.

"I believe in you, Samantha. I know that O'Neill and Daniel Jackson feel similarly. Allow us to help you carry this. Share the burden with us and perhaps we can all emerge from this stronger than before."

Sam ducked her head to her chest. She knew he spoke the truth from a pure heart, but sharing this much of herself had never come easily. "I don't know if I can."

"For as long as I have known you, you have never backed down from a challenge. Never. Do not back away from this one. This is something to be conquered, like any other trial we have endured over the years. Treat it as such. A problem to be solved."

Sam bit her lip, considering. The idea had been niggling at the back of her mind for the last couple of days and she realized now that she could use an ally in pulling it off. If she was right, it would free her from the dreams and flashbacks. If she was wrong, she'd be freed anyway, but in a way that might destroy those around her. In the end, Sam felt as though she had no real choice, caught between the proverbial rock and hard place with nothing but options that went from bad to worse.

"If I asked you for something, would you hear me out before answering?"

"Of course."

"I need to be on the mission. Don't ask me why, because I'm not sure I really know. But I am sure that if I'm going to ever be able to put this behind me, I need to go."

"Are you certain that is a wise course of action?"

Sam snorted derisively. "Just the opposite, actually. I'm fairly sure this is a pretty foolish course of action. But I can feel this as strongly as I have felt anything before. I have to be there. I have to help take them down, otherwise this is going to haunt me for the rest of my life."

Teal'c gazed at his teammate critically, noting the resolve in her eyes and the surety in her voice. She believed it to be true, and perhaps that was all that really mattered. But he feared she was far from ready for such a demanding mission, physically as well as emotionally.

"And what of O'Neill and Doctor Brightman? It is unlikely they will clear you for such a mission."

"Ah… that's where maybe you could help."

It was not the first time she had asked him to take a leap of faith based on little other than her word, and the consequences were as dire as they had ever been. Deny her request and she would likely either find a way to get there on her own, and he would be unable to watch out for her or she would stay behind possibly destroying any chances of her ever returning to full duty. Grant her what she was asking for, and they could lose her anyway, considering her weakened state.

The risks were great in either eventuality and he understood the enormity of Sam's impasse. Teal'c did not, in any case, believe that his team leader would sit idly by at the SGC when she felt so strongly that she needed to be on the mission and in the end, his decision was practially made for him.

"I will request you be assigned to my team for this mission. I have been given the task of assembling one of the two strike teams along with Colonel Reynolds. That will mean you will be fully under my command, Colonel Carter. Should I feel the need to order you out of a situation, I must ask that my order be followed."

"I understand. Believe me, following your orders is not something that's going to be a problem for me. I'm glad you'll be there with me."

"Indeed."

Sam was relieved and unnerved in a ball of conflicting emotions that churned at her stomach. Teal'c had been the wild card. Jack and Doctor Brightman were the true constants in this, their reactions predictable, nearly set in stone.

Teal'c however, could have gone either way. If he had refused her, the task would have become infinitely more difficult. Sam's resolve, however, would have been unaffected. She needed to do this; could feel it in her bones that this was the right thing for her to do. Convincing others of that fact was the hard part. But now she had an ally, and one she thought was one of the few people who could truly understand her reasons.

Sam looked up into Teal'c's warm brown eyes, shining with concern; in the beginning the former First Prime had intimidated her, along with much of the SGC. But now all she saw was a friend and fellow soldier and she knew she could count on him to get her through just about anything.

"Thank you, Teal'c."

"Your thanks may be premature. Thank me when we have returned safely and our mission has been accomplished."

TBC….


	16. Chapter Sixteen

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Sixteen**

"You WHAT?"

Teal'c stood, stoic as ever, his face an unreadable mask as O'Neill huffed out a furious breath. The General's reaction was not unexpected and Teal'c had prepared his argument carefully.

"Doctor Brightman has cleared Colonel Carter for light duty for the next three days and for full duty immediately following. I will personally see to her safety and if at any time it appears as though she is not prepared, I will drop her from my roster."

"And that's supposed to make me feel better about this?" Jack retorted sarcastically.

"No, it is not, O'Neill. However, I have reviewed this mission carefully and Colonel Carter's first hand knowledge of the temple and the layout inside will be invaluable on this mission. Our odds of succeeding will increase substantially with her on the team."

"Teal'c, do I need to remind you exactly what's she's been through the last week or so? I could've sworn you were right there, but it appears as though you've lost just enough of your mind to have forgotten all of that."

"I do not believe you are viewing this objectively, O'Neill…"

Jack interrupted him with a enraged wave of his hand, "To hell with objectivity, how about some good old fashioned common sense?"

Teal'c merely lifted an eyebrow and waited, allowing Jack's anger to dissapate some before continuing.

"You know as well as I that Colonel Carter will be ready for this mission. And we both know that we need her help. But I believe that her presence on the team will have a positive effect not only on the outcome but also on the Colonel herself."

"If she lives through it."

Teal'c consciously gentled his expression, relaxing his arms and shoulders. "O'Neill, as my brother and my friend, I pledge to you that on my honor and my life, she will return. She must be allowed to participate."

"Must be allowed? Exactly what does that mean?"

Teal'c hesitated, unsure how much of his conversation with Colonel Carter he should reveal. His desire to protect her privacy and her trust at war with the knowledge that O'Neill needed to know what was happening, both personally and professionally. But it wasn't for him to say how much of her motivations would be revealed; he could only hope to influence O'Neill enough to ask for himself.

"Colonel Carter must be allowed to finish what was started. She must be allowed some closure. I believe the best way for that to happen is to include her on this mission."

Jack pressed his mouth into a hard, thin line. "She put you up to this, didn't she? She wants to go on the mission and knew I'd turn her down."

"I am not at liberty to discuss Colonel Carter's motivations with you, O'Neill. That should come from her."

"In other words, yes, but you won't come out and say 'yes'."

"I believe you should ask her for yourself, O'Neill."

"Oh believe me, first chance I get. First chance." Jack exhaled forcefully, fighting the urge to storm down to Sam's lab and confront her on the spot. He knew she'd been cleared for light duty in her lab for the rest of the week and that she had a good deal to chatch up on, both with her duties at the SGC and Area 51.

Teal'c noted the tension in Jack's body. "Do not behave rashly, O'Neill. It may do more harm than good."

"Rashly? I'm behaving rashly? Oh for cryin' out loud!"

"I did not mean to imply that your feelings on this matter are without merit, however, you as a warrior must understand Colonel Carter's feelings on this."

Jack felt the bluster drain right out of him as he realized Teal'c was exactly right. He knew all too well what Sam was going through and accepting that fact was accepting that he and Sam had a good deal more in common on this particular issue than they had just a week ago. The thought both saddened and inspired him.

"Okay, okay. I read you, loud and clear. No 'rashness'. But she and I are going to have this out, T. One way or the other."

"Understood, O'Neill. Do I have your permission to place Colonel Carter on the duty roster?"

Jack squinted as though he were in pain, his face contorting into a grimace. "Yeah, damnit. But I'm still going to try and talk her out of it."

"I would expect no less, from either of you."

Teal'c turned and strode from the room, his hands still clasped calmly behind his back. Jack watched him go feeling more weary than he had since Sam had been carried, wounded and unconscious, through the 'gate.

There was no way in hell he was going to allow Sam to suffer in silence as he had after those long months spent in an Iraqi prison. The months and even years after he was repatriated had been spent functioning in a sort of limbo, no one really knowing or understanding what was going on in his head. And even if someone had known, it wasn't like he was going to invite anyone into his personal hell.

Even Sarah hadn't known the true depths to which he had sunk, suffering from endless nightmares and the occassional flashback that had left him sweating and nauseated, the ghostly smell of burning flesh in his nostrils, the taste of foul water on his lips. Swallowing the barrel of his service revolver had definitely seemed like a viable option for some time, long before Charlie's death had brought it all back home again.

He knew the signs were there, but he hadn't wanted to see them. Sam's unwillingness to talk about what had happened, the dreams that plagued her nightly; for a moment he honestly thought he was going to be ill. Was there more she'd been keeping from him? Possibly. Probably. _Goddamnit all to hell and back again._

He could well imagine what was running through Sam's head, the incessant voices that whispered during those quiet times when your defenses were at their lowest. Whispered that if you just went back, made them pay, it would all be okay again. Things would be normal again. But that was all a crock of shit. Things would never, ever be the same again. And God help him, this wasn't the first time this had happened to her.

After the whole thing with Antarctica and Fifth he'd been waiting for her to break, expecting it. When it didn't happen, and in fact Sam seemed to thrive in her new rank and position, he had breathed a sigh of relief that perhaps they had actually managed to dodge a bullet. It looked like he was a bit premature in letting his guard down.

He had already arranged to meet Sam at her place for dinner that night. A little celebration of her return to work well ahead of the time table Doctor Brightman had told them to expect. If he was going to talk to her about this, now was the time. They didn't have the luxury of waiting until some fictional time when she would be 'ready'. He just hoped he didn't screw things up even more than they already were.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Dinner had been a rather quiet affair, and Sam found herself pleasantly full and dozing lightly on the couch, her head cradled in Jack's lap as he rythmically ran his hands through her hair, massaging her temples gently. When his voice broke the silence she was nearly asleep.

"So, how was the first day back?"

"Hmm?" Sam mumbled softly.

"Your day? Get your inbox cleared out yet?"

"Ah… yeah, actually. Wasn't too bad. I've still got some reports to write and some stuff to go over for the team at Area 51. Felt good to be back. How 'bout you?"

"Oh you know, same 'ol same 'ol. Reports, memos, requisitions. The exciting life of a General in the Air Force."

Sam smiled up at him. "Ah yes, the kind of stuff that really gets the old adrenaline pumping." Her smile faded as she took in the serious look in his eyes and the firm set to his mouth. She knew what was coming, had actually been surprised when he hadn't hit her with it the minute he'd walked in the door that evening.

"I had pretty interesting meeting today."

"Really?"

"Yep. Teal'c came to me with a request."

"That doesn't happen often."

"No, no it doesn't."

"So, are you going to grant it?"

"Not sure that decision is entirely up to me."

"It isn't?"

"There's a lot more to consider than just what I want. There's the rest of the team. Reynolds too, it's his plan. He should have some say in the make up of the team that goes with him through the 'gate."

Sam dropped her eyes, reaching out to entwine their fingers in a loose embrace. She'd been waiting most of the day to learn whether or not she would be included on the mission. Teal'c had been evasive when she'd asked him indicating that he had presented his case and that it was now up to others to decide.

"Your recommendation could swing things one way or the other on this."

Jack's voice was a bare whisper. "Yeah. I know."

Sam shifted slightly, turning to sit up so she could look him directly, still clinging to his hand.

"I know this hasn't been easy for you…"

Jack cut her off sharply. "Hasn't been easy? Christ, Sam… for someone with an IQ as high as yours, you say some pretty dumb things sometimes."

Sam dropped her eyes, shifting uncomfortably under his intense scrutiny. "I'm sorry…"

"You can stop that too."

"What?"

"Apologizing every five minutes. Every now and then a good fight might help, ya know?"

"Not really, no. It's not like I've had a lot of… positive experiences with this whole relationship thing. Half the time I'm scared I'm going to do or say something that will… that you'll decide you've had enough and take off."

Jack reached out, gently grasping Sam's chin, tilting her face up to meet his. "Sam, it's going to take a helluva lot more than a fight to get me to leave. Don't ever doubt that. But honest to God, I don't think I've been as scared as I was this past week in a long, long time. Puts me on edge."

"Hasn't been one of the better times in my life either."

"Yeah, I know," Jack responded quietly. "You ready to tell me about it?"

Sam hesitated. Her talk with Teal'c had helped, but the flashback she had experienced had rattled her more than she wanted to admit. But if there was anyone in the world who would understand what she was feeling, it was Jack. The question was, could she tell him about it? Before she could decide whether or not to speak, Jack broke in on her thoughts.

"You can keep it to yourself if you want. God knows I did that for a lot of years, for all the good it did me. But if you want this mission, I need to know what's going on with you before I'll make any recommendations one way or the other. That's the deal."

Sam turned away, her throat flooded with the tears she resolutely refused to allow to fall. Ashamed of them. Knew they made Jack uncomfortable.

Jack could see her clenched jaw, felt her hand tense under his. "Don't do this. You can't bottle it up. Believe me, I tried. It doesn't work. It eats you alive."

"Yeah…"

"You're still not sleeping."

Sam sighed. There was no way she was going to get out of this conversation this time. "Not very well, no."

Jack felt as though he had become the worlds biggest hypocrit, forcing Sam to talk to him like this, but what choice did he have?

"What else?"

Sam drew a shaky breath, keeping her face turned away from him, hanging onto what little control she had left she began to speak.

"Sometimes, it seems like it didn't even happen to me. Like it's something that happened to someone else and I'm just an observer. But then there are other times… times when I know it's real. Hits me in the weirdest places too. Like in the car driving home tonight, when all I have to distract me is the radio and the road. And it's not enough, so all I can think about is what happened."

"But that's not all, is it?" Jack knew he was right. Had seen it on her face when he'd walked in the door that evening. Before his talk with Teal'c he hadn't really looked at her too closely, afraid of what he would see. But now he had no choice, he had to look, had to see. Her haunted, shadowed eyes had been like looking in a mirror.

Sam's head dropped between her shoulders as the tears finally broke free and slid silently down her cheeks embarrasing and frustrating her. She didn't think she could speak without her voice breaking and so simply shook her head.

Jack nodded solemnly. "So what was it? A smell? A sound? Something you did that you've done a hundred times before but this time it triggered it?"

Sam's head came up sharply, her surprise written across her face, her voice a bare whisper. "Yeah."

The sight of her tears broke his heart. There was something about a strong woman in tears that could bring him to his knees. She'd allowed him to see them so very rarely, and every time it was like razors slicing through his gut. "Thought so."

"You did?"

"I figured it might happen. I was just hoping to God it wouldn't."

"You expected this?" Sam asked incredulously.

Jack nodded again. "Yeah. So you gonna tell me about it?"

Sam shook her head ruefully. "It wasn't anything, really. I still can't believe… we were just talking."

"We?"

"Teal'c came by yesterday for lunch. Everything was fine but… he didn't mean to… he just… he just asked me to sit down. I still don't really know what happened. One minute I was standing in the living room the next I was back in that damned interrogation room. Ba'al's Jaffa ordering me to sit in the chair. Asking me the usual, ya know? How many were with me. GDO codes. How we found them. I wouldn't give anything up. I think that pissed them off more than the fact that we found them in the first place."

"Jaffa."

"What?"

"He's a Jaffa. That might've been enough."

Sam paled at the thought and she opened her mouth instinctively to deny it, then closed it again, knowing Jack was most likely right. The last thing she could take was the idea that simply being around one of her closest and most trusted friends could trigger another flashback.

"I wish I could take all of this away for you."

"I know you do."

"So why the push to join the mission? What if that happens to you on the planet? Being there might trigger another one."

"I know it might and I'm just going to have to take that chance. I'm not sure how to explain it. Not sure I really know myself. I just know that if I'm ever going to get past this, I have to be there. I have to be a part of taking them down."

"You sure there isn't something else going on?"

"Like what?"

"It would be totally understandable if you wanted to get a little pay back."

"I think that's part of it, but not all. I wish I could tell you. I really do, I'm just not sure. But I do know that I have to do this, Jack. Please believe me."

Jack gave Sam a hard look, scrutinizing her closely. He could see the resolve in her eyes, but also the pain and uncertainty. If she felt this strongly that she was willing to put herself on the line for this mission, he wasn't sure he could turn her down. But God knew he wanted to, more than anything.

"Let me talk it over with Reynolds. In the end, it's his call."

Relief washed through her and Sam gripped Jack's hand tightly. "Thank you."

"Don't. No thanks, Sam. Just come home, okay? No heroics, no unnecessary risks."

"It's a risk every time we…"

"Oh please, spare me the bullshit, you know what I mean. Don't pretend you don't."

Sam nodded, running her hands across her cheeks in a vain attempt at drying them. Jack reached up, laying his hands gently on her wrists to still them, pulling them down into his lap.

"You don't need to hide them from me. Ever."

Sam's eyes widened, unsure what to say. In the end she opted to say nothing, instead turned to lean against his chest, her head reclining against his shoulder.

Jack slid his arms around her waist, pulling her tightly against him. Nothing in his life had ever felt as right as the way Sam fit into his arms and the mere thought that he could lose that feeling turned his guts into a quivering mass of anxiety. He knew he had to let her go, he had to allow her the chance to exorcise her demons. He just wished he could be there to watch her six himself. But this time he had to leave that duty to Teal'c, he could only pray that the Jaffa and the rest of the team would be enough.

TBC…


	17. Chapter Seventeen

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Seventeen**

Sam received word the next day that Colonel Reynolds approved her inclusion on the team and that she had been assigned to Teal'c's strike force, but with one small caveat. Teal'c was to evaluate and approve her physical fitness for duty before she could begin training with the rest of the team.

The obstacle course at the SGC training facility was modified slightly to accommodate the unique challenges expected on this mission and Sam found herself standing on the edges of it just after noon on Sunday. It had taken every ounce of grit and stamina she had in her to make it through and in the end she finished the course just under the time limit set for the exercise. She was officially on the team and would begin training that next day.

The biggest surprise of the week came when she had reported to the training facility the first day the entire team was to assemble and begin preparations. Sam walked into the small briefing room in the makeshift building that housed the training staff offices for the SGC and was stunned to see Daniel sitting alone, already occupying a chair at the far end of the conference table.

"Daniel. What're you doing here?" Sam asked incredulously.

"Well, good morning to you too, Sam," Daniel replied casually. "Coffee?"

"Ah, sure, thanks. But, well, what're you doing here?" Sam asked again, her impatience with her team mate and friend getting the best of her.

Daniel upended a blue Air Force mug and poured Sam a cup of coffee from the carafe on the table.

"Heard it through the grapevine that you and Teal'c were going back to Ba'al's temple. And since there are only two people in the entire SGC who have even seen the inside of the place, seemed to make sense that both go on the mission, right?"

"Daniel, this isn't an exploration mission. This one is all business. Strictly a search and destroy mission. Not the type you usually volunteer for," Sam answered pragmatically.

"No, you're right. It's not. But if you're going back there, you're sure as hell not going back without me."

Sam smiled, touched by Daniel's loyalty, no matter how misplaced she might think it was.

"I'll be fine. I've got Teal'c and the rest of the team Colonel Reynolds put together. You don't need to do this."

"No, I do need to do this."

Sam cocked her head, genuinely confused. "Why?"

"Because last time… I just…" Daniel trailed off uncertainly.

"Last time was different. Last time we didn't know what was waiting for us. This time we do."

"And this time they know we're coming. Seems like not much has changed, if you ask me."

"Okay, you're probably right. But that doesn't mean you need to put your life on the line for this."

"Don't patronize me, Sam. I know what I'm getting into."

Sam pursed her lips. The last thing she wanted to do was say the wrong thing here and end up hurting one of her closest friends.

"Daniel, I wasn't patronizing you. We both know that military operations are not your strong suit. And yes, your experience with the temple would be somewhat helpful, but really, I'm fine. Okay?"

"Yeah well, maybe I just need to go."

"You need to go?"

"Yeah. I need to." Daniel paused, considering how much of his own personal demons to lay out on the table. "I screwed up last time. I screwed up and you… we could've lost you, Sam. I'll be damned if I'm going to sit back at the SGC safe and sound if you're going back there."

"Daniel, you didn't screw anything up last time. You did just what I ordered you to do. It was the right thing to do. Don't ever doubt that."

"Yeah, well, I swore years ago I would always be there to watch your backs. All of you. Teal'c and Jack included. So if you're going back, I'm going to be right there. Watching your back just like always." _Like I didn't do last time. I never should have left her behind._

Sam sighed, knowing that she too had some deep seated reasons for needing to be included on this mission. Daniel's reasons were no less valid than her own. More so, perhaps, depending on your point of view.

"Alright. I'm not going to argue with you. But Daniel, you have to understand, there can be no hesitation. You have to be willing to follow orders immediately and without question. People could get killed if you don't. Do you think you can do that? Honestly?"

Daniel didn't answer right away, but took several moments to seriously consider the question. It was Sam's order that had led to her capture, but that didn't lessen the guilt he carried over the aftermath and her near death. Could he really leave her behind again, if ordered? If he were brutally honest, the answer was an unequivocal 'No'. Other orders given in the heat of battle, he was fairly certain he wouldn't have a problem following.

"I'll follow orders, Sam. All but one. I'm not going to leave anyone behind this time. Not again. I don't care about the consequences. Besides, how many times did we hear that from Jack over the years? No one gets left behind. No one."

"Daniel, it's not that simple and you know it."

"I know it's not. But that's the way it is."

Sam ran a frustrated hand through her hair. Up until now, she'd never truly appreciated how deep the man's stubbornness ran. It was a miracle General O'Neill hadn't tossed him from the team years ago, just to save himself the pain of dealing with it.

"I should go to Colonel Reynolds. Have you tossed from the mission for this."

"I know. But I'm asking you, as a friend and as someone who understands, don't. Please."

"Let me think about it, okay?"

"That's all I ask," Daniel replied simply, resuming his seat as the other members of the team began to file in and take their seats. He could only hope that Sam could see the depth of his resolve and the lengths he would go to be included on the mission. He suspected that she understood all too well his feelings on the matter.

As the briefing began, Sam had to force her attention to Colonel Reynolds. Daniel's declaration that he would leave no one behind weighed heavily on her and she knew, logically, she should report the conversation. But wasn't she herself on this mission despite the misgivings of both Teal'c and Jack? Could she deny Daniel the same chance at redemption that she herself was seeking? In all honesty, no, she couldn't anymore than she could sit this one out either. She only hoped that in the end none of them would live to regret their decisions.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The next three days were spent training with the team, Sam and Daniel's assignment was to cover the first wave of the strike team, led by Teal'c, who would enter the 'gate initially and secure it and the DHD once on the other side. Sam, Daniel, and two others would be the next through the 'gate, rounding out the initial team which would be followed closely by Reynolds and the rest of the force.

The first two nights she'd come home and collapsed onto the couch, exhausted but feeling better than she had since before that last fateful mission. Her nights were still filled with haunting images, but her days had been mercifully free of any flashbacks.

Jack had taken to spending his evenings and nights at her place, an unspoken agreement that she wouldn't be alone. Not that she was complaining. Sam had lived alone for a number of years and had always thought it would be difficult to adjust to having someone around.

But not with Jack. Maybe it was the years of sleeping side by side off world, or maybe it was the closeness they both felt, but she was comfortable with him there. Even if all they were doing was sitting on the couch together watching television, Sam felt more at ease than she ever had with any other man in her life.

She had made him home just ahead of him tonight. Her orders to get a full nights rest before the 0900 embarkation the next morning. Sam knew Jack was on edge about her involvement, and she knew the only thing that might set his mind at ease would be to pull out, but she couldn't.

Planning a nice meal for the both of them, Sam set about making the preparations, laying out the ingredients and setting the table. When Jack arrived, the candles on the table were lit and Sam had changed into tight black jeans and a soft white short sleeved sweater. As she pulled open the door Jack took in the sight of her, the jeans and sweater hugging her figure in all the right places, his mouth dropped open involuntarily.

"Ah… did I miss an occasion or something?"

"Um… not really. Just thought a quiet dinner before I leave tomorrow would be nice."

Jack stepped the rest of the way into the foyer and wrapped his arms possessively around Sam's waist. Sam allowed herself to sink into his embrace, her forehead resting against his shoulder. He reached up to cup the back of her head, running his fingers lightly through her silken hair. Sam turned in his arms, the pull of his inviting lips too much to resist and she found herself leaning inexorably closer until they were breathing the same air.

Jack felt his heart rate quicken as Sam leaned closer, her full lips tantalizingly close. She hovered, just out of reach until finally he gave in and pulled her to him, crushing his mouth against hers in a passionate and powerful kiss. He poured his heart and soul into the embrace, giving free reign to his love, allowing it to wash over them both.

Sam parted her lips slightly, allowing Jack's tongue to slip into her mouth, deepening the kiss. Breathless they finally broke apart, hearts pounding in unison.

"So, when's dinner going to be ready?" Jack asked, a hunger that had nothing to do with food burning in his eyes.

Sam smiled, a slow sexy upturn of her sensual lips that turned Jack's guts inside out and back again. "Give me a minute, I'll just turn the oven down. It'll keep."

In a frenzy of discarded clothing and tangled limbs, a desperate need, lovemaking that burned white hot had slowly cooled. The frenetic energy dissipating into gentle caresses as they took their time exploring each other. Leisurely kisses rekindled the fires of desire that eventually left them both physically exhausted but contented in ways neither had experienced before.

Sam had expected there to be at least a measure of awkwardness as was common with new lovers, but with Jack it was as though they had been doing this for years. He seemed to know her instinctively, his hands moving confidently over her body, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. As she lay spent in his arms, her heart slowly returning to a more normal rhythm, she didn't think she'd felt so alive in her entire life.

Rolling up on one arm, Sam gazed down into Jack's eyes. "I love you," she said simply, her heart poured into every word.

They had only said it once before, during that fateful night in the infirmary when he had sunk into the depths of despair, only to be pulled out again by the sight of her alive and awake.

"I love you, too. Heart and soul, Sam. Heart and soul."

Sam blinked sudden tears from her eyes, smiling brilliantly.

Jack raised himself up to brush his lips gently across hers, his hand tenderly stroking her face, cupping her chin. "My Samantha."

"I love it when you say that."

"What?"

"My name."

Jack smiled, the joy reaching down into the darkest parts of him and lighting them with a gentle glow as only the love of someone as dear to him as Sam, could.

"So, do you suppose dinner is beyond hope?"

"I'm sure I can salvage it. You hungry?"

"Oh yeah. But I need food first," Jack said, grinning wolfishly.

Sam blushed as his frankly appreciative eyes roaming over her naked form. She had never thought of herself as particularly good looking, always seeing herself at fifteen, the uncoordinated tomboy who intimidated the boys with her sharp mind. She rolled her eyes to cover her embarrassment and pushed herself off the bed, pulling on her discarded clothing as she went.

"What?" Jack asked innocently as he too tumbled from the bed and bent to pull on his jeans and t-shirt.

Catching up with Sam in the kitchen as she attended to their delayed meal, Jack stood behind her, wrapping his arms securely around her waist as Sam stirred the chicken and rice, warm from the oven, albeit a bit crispy around the edges.

"This'll be ready in just a minute. There's Guinness in the fridge if you're interested."

Jack tightened his grip on Sam's waist, turning her around to face him. Tracing her cheek with a finger, he tipped her chin up and kissed her, whisper soft at first, then more urgently. He couldn't seem to get enough of her and wondered if he ever would. He felt Sam melt into his embrace as she deepened the kiss.

Pulling back reluctantly, Jack took in the flush of her cheeks, the brightness of her impossibly blue eyes.

"You're beautiful," he breathed, overwhelmed with her.

Sam looked away, uncomfortable with the complement.

Jack ducked his head, forcing eye contact. "I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it."

"I know you wouldn't. I'm just not used to hearing it."

"Well then, I'll just have to say it more often. Until you do get used to it."

Sam slapped playfully at his chest. "Okay, okay, enough already. Go on in and have a seat, dinner'll be ready in a minute."

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The silver moonlight streamed in through Sam's bedroom window. Jack had watched it creep slowly across the bedspread. He knew he should be sleeping, the day ahead promised to be long and trying. But somehow he couldn't bring himself to close his eyes. How long had he dreamed of this? Lying with Sam curled comfortably in his arms, naked and warm, her legs wrapped around his.

Her soft breaths tickled at his chest as she lay sleeping, her face looking relaxed and incredibly young in the moonlight. He clung to her, as a drowning man would cling to a raft, for he was drowning just as surely as if he had been cast adrift on the high seas. Sam was his salvation and he knew he would do anything to protect her, keep her safe.

So how was it that he was allowing her to return to that god forsaken planet in the morning? Into a situation that he knew would result in the loss of life? Was taking the chance that this would restore some semblance of balance to her life worth the terrible risk? He didn't think so, but in the end it truly wasn't up to him. He couldn't take that choice away from her, no matter how much he loved her.

But lying there in the small hours of the morning, he couldn't help but feel as though this might be his only chance to feel this way. His only chance to hold her close, to show her in the most intimate of ways just how much he loved her. Morbid thoughts continued to intrude on the joy he had experienced earlier than evening, crowding out the happiness and replacing it with dread.

He didn't want to feel this way, but he couldn't seem to help himself. He was too much the cynic. Too accustomed to life throwing him curves that sooner or later took him out at the knees. It had happened far too often for him not to expect it.

Wrenching his thoughts away from what may or may not come to pass, Jack gazed down at Sam's face and acknowledged that no matter what happened in the morning, he would always have this night. Settling himself more comfortably into the pillows Jack reluctantly allowed his eyes to slide closed. He had done what he could to keep her safe, built a rock solid team around her. Now it was up to her to bring herself home in one piece and he had to have faith that she would do just that.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Sam stood in the locker room, her gear neatly arrayed in front of her on the bench. She had already checked and re-checked everything until she could find any piece of equipment by touch alone. This was it, embarkation was only a few minutes away and she was as nervous as she had been the first time she had stepped through the 'gate on her way to Abydos.

_Get a grip, Colonel. Now is not the time for this. Get your head on straight, already._ Sam mentally chastised herself, shaking her head slightly.

The night before she had slept better than she had in weeks, even before the nightmares had become her nightly companion. She had mentioned it to Jack when they awoke in the early hours of the morning.

"_How ya feelin' this morning?" He had asked, his casual smile covering for his genuine concern._

"_Actually, better than I have in a while."_

"_Really?"_

"_Really. Thank you."_

"_What for?"_

"_Last night. Today. Everything."_

"_No need to thank me for last night," Jack answered, a rakish grin on his face. "As for the rest, well…"_

"_I know how you feel about me going on this mission. This is something I have to do."_

"_I know that. Honestly, I do. Doesn't make it any easier."_

"_I know that too. But I've got Teal'c and Daniel looking out for me. Can't ask for a better team."_

_Jack said nothing, but had simply wrapped his arms tightly around her as they lay and waited for the sun to rise and herald the new day._

Sam shook her head to clear the pleasant but distracting memories of the night they had spent together. As she donned her jacket and vest, she couldn't imagine anything giving her more incentive to return home safe and sound than the prospect of spending the rest of her life wrapped in the warm, safe embrace she had found herself in when she had awoken that morning. She'd do what she had to do to exorcise the demons that lingered from her fateful trip to -035, and then would return home, hopefully at peace with herself and the past.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Jack stood pacing in the control room. The staff wisely remaining out of his way, easily reading the edgy tension that radiated from their commanding officer. He wanted nothing more than to call the whole thing off and barring that strap on a P-90 harness and go with them. Unfortunately, neither of those options was available to him. Jack glanced at his watch again, T minus five minutes. The team would begin assembling in the 'gateroom any minute now.

On queue, Teal'c and Colonel Reynolds emerged from the stairwell, each kitted out and ready to depart.

"Any last orders, General?"

"No Colonel. The plan's as sound as we're going to be able to make it. Good hunting."

"Aye, Sir. All goes well, we'll be back here in time for dinner."

"Right," Jack answered warily. "Just be sure you make it back in one piece."

"Understood, Sir," Reynolds replied before turning and heading back down the stairs toward the 'gateroom.

Teal'c inclined his head in acknowledgement before turning to follow.

"T?"

Turning back to face Jack, Teal'c quirked an eyebrow. "O'Neill."

"Bring 'em back."

"I will endeavor to do so, O'Neill. With my shield, or on it."

Jack's eyebrows shot up. He hadn't heard that phrase in years, not since his Black Ops days. 'With your shield, or on it' had been their rallying cry. They would come home victorious or carried home as a fallen hero, but never without their shield, never returning home a coward. Teal'c's inference was clear. He would come home with the team victorious, or die trying.

"Yes, well. I would prefer with it."

"As would I," Teal'c replied and then proceeded to the 'gateroom to join the rest of the team now gathered there.

Jack watched his retreating form as it disappeared down the stairwell before turning toward the control room windows and the Stargate beyond. Carter had just entered the 'gateroom, followed closely by Daniel, his head covered in his usual OD do-rag. The archaeologist looked more than a bit out of place on the purely military team, but Jack had learned the hard way over the years that Daniel was just as able to handle himself as anyone in the SGC.

"Sergeant Harriman, dial the 'gate."

"Yes, Sir," Harriman answered, efficiently manipulating the keyboard, entering the coordinates for P7X-035.

Jack listened with half an ear as the Sergeant counted down the chevrons as each was entered and locked in.

"Chevron seven… locked."

The 'gate exploded in blue fire, the 'gateroom filled with it's ephemeral light. The sight both awed and terrified the General. Jack watched Sam take up her position behind Teal'c and the lead element of the strike force. Jack reached for the microphone.

His voice steadier than he felt, Jack gave the order.

"Strike Force Galaxy, you have a go."

He watched as Teal'c inclined his head then marched up the ramp and without hesitation disappeared through the event horizon, followed closely by the next three members of the advance team. Sam and Daniel stepped up, followed closely by Lieutenants Garrett and Kent, the remainder of the advance team. Jack's eyes never left Sam as she mounted the steps and checked her watch, waiting out the agreed upon fifteen seconds before following.

Sensing his gaze on her, Sam looked up over her shoulder and caught Jack's eye. Giving him a ghost of a smile and a quick nod she turned and without hesitation plunged through the event horizon, toward her destiny.

To Be Continued...


	18. Chapter Eighteen

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Eighteen**

Colonel Reynolds watched from the rear of the formation as the advance team disappeared through the event horizon. They had ninety seconds to wait from the time the second half of the advance team entered the wormhole before they would be on their way to join them. The lead time would hopefully give the advance team time to clear the 'gate area and secure the DHD.

This was the most critical part of the mission. If the advance team failed to secure the area surrounding the 'gate, none of them would be getting home tonight. Counting down the seconds, Reynolds raised his head to survey his team. They were among the best the SGC had to offer, there had been no shortage of volunteers for this mission. The best of the SG-3 Marines, men and women with Recon and Ranger training. Even a Lieutenant junior grade, newly assigned from the Navy's elite SeAL Teams, could be counted among the strike force.

They had demolitions experts as well as a soldier who's skill with a sniper rifle had become legendary among the ranks. And still, Reynolds was uneasy. So much relied upon nearly split second timing and a healthy dose of luck. If either failed them this mission would go down in a hurry.

"Five seconds. Here we go, people," Reynolds announced calmly, hefting his rifle to his shoulder and striding up the ramp.

Counting down the remaining seconds silently, Reynolds plunged into the wormhole, steeling himself for the firefight he expected to find raging on the other side.

What he found was worse.

Chaos. Smoke and fire choked the air with acrid fumes that left him gasping. Instinctively he ducked under the wild staff weapon's fire that seemed to be coming from everywhere at once. Recalling the training they had drilled relentlessly over the last two weeks, he swiftly descended the stone stairs and took up his assigned position to the right of the Stargate, close to the DHD.

The remaining members of his strike force followed quickly, easily dropping into their respective positions and opening fire on the Jaffa in front of them. Ba'al's troops were well trained, and had erected a defensive perimeter that nearly encircled the 'gate and DHD.

"Take cover! Open fire! Try to keep their heads down!" Reynolds barked out orders at the top of his lungs, attempting to be heard over the din of the near constant weapons fire.

"Green! Get over here with that 206!"

The Navy Lieutenant dropped swiftly at his commanding officer's side, cocking the grenade launcher he carried he prepared to open fire.

"Over there! To our left! Punch a hole through their lines!"

"Aye, Sir!" Green replied as he smoothly took aim and fired directly into the midst of the Jaffa formation with a fragmentary grenade. The projectile exploded at nearly the same time it impacted a Jaffa warrior, taking out four other nearby soldiers in the process.

The explosion gave them a momentary respite from the constant fire and Reynolds took the opportunity to seek out the advance team. Peering through the haze and smoke, he couldn't see much past the DHD.

"Do you see SG-1 and the others?" Reynolds called out, hoping another of the team would have a better vantage point.

"Negative!" Came the response from the troops behind him.

His heart sank. If the advance team hadn't made it through, at least in part, the entire mission would be in jeopardy. They needed the extra troops to make this work.

"Affirmative Colonel! I have a position on SG-1! 50 meters to our right, Sir!"

"Concentrate fire on that area. Give them some cover!"

The team opened fire on the Jaffa facing off against their right flank and for the first time Reynolds caught a glimpse of them as they fought valiantly against an enemy that outnumbered them three to one.

Colonel Carter had taken cover behind a small fallen section of what appeared to be an ancient column or portion of a wall. At her side was Doctor Jackson, blasting away with his P-90 as though he'd been doing it all his life. Reynolds couldn't see Teal'c or the other members of the advance team and for a moment feared that Carter and Jackson had been the only two members to have survived the first wave.

Suddenly a blast of fire from nearly behind the Jaffa lines caused a few of the warriors to break off their attack on the 'gate and redeploy to meet the new threat. Teal'c, Kent and Garrett had managed to free themselves and get around behind the Jaffa, catching them unaware and unprepared to counter an assault from two sides. Carter and Jackson took advantage of their momentary disorder to pour on the fire, taking out the three nearest Jaffa even as Green reloaded and fired a second grenade that wounded two more.

In a heartbeat it was over, the weapon's fire fading into the hazy air, leaving a tense silence behind.

"Cease fire! Cease fire!" Reynolds called as he slowly stood from his sheltered position to appraise the condition of his team.

"Team leaders, head count!"

Teal'c was the first to respond. "Two wounded, all others present and or accounted for, Sir."

"All members, present and or accounted for, Sir."

"Roger that. Green, your team's got the 'gate. You know your assignment. Hold it at all costs. We lose the 'gate, we don't go home."

"Understood, Sir. We'll hold the door open," the SeAL replied confidently, gesturing to his team to take up their rehearsed stations.

"Teal'c, have Doc Winters see to your wounded. You need to get moving on that temple."

"Understood, we are prepared," Teal'c responded, his team assembling behind him. Their faces were grim, smudged with dirt and grit from the firefight. The first battle had been won, and even though they had sustained casualties, no lives had been lost and for that they were grateful. But the war was far from over. Teal'c motioned to Kent who took up the lead position as they headed off into the tree line.

Reynolds watched them go, wishing he was with them, but knowing his role in this was just as vital. Covering their escape, which promised to be as difficult as their entrance to this world, was a duty he didn't take lightly. For now, all he could do was sit back and wait.

Sam clutched her weapon tightly, her knuckles white as she struggled to hold herself steady. The effects of the adrenaline were already fading and she pushed her free hand down her trousers, drying the sweat from her palm. Physically Sam felt a bit shaky, but her mind was sharp enough to keep her thoughts on her job.

They made their way soundlessly through the trees, moving steadily toward their objective. They expected that the battle at the 'gate would alert the troops on patrol of their presence. An attack could come at any time from any direction and everyone was on guard.

Once they had approached to within half a klic of the temple, Teal'c signaled a halt. From here on out things would be much more dangerous and their need for stealth at its greatest. Motioning the team to draw in close, Teal'c spoke in hushed tones.

"This will be our rally point once our mission is completed. Once the charges have been set we have two minutes to get out and meet back here."

Teal'c met the eyes of each member of his team and saw a steely eyed determination reflected in each of them. Nodding in approval, he stood smoothly, the team following suit.

Daniel's heart began to pound as they came ever closer to their objective. He had hoped to never see this god forsaken place again, but now that he was here the urge to exact some payback was nearly overwhelming. Five years ago he never would have considered such a reaction was possible. But so much had changed. He had changed. And now, the lust for revenge felt almost natural. Almost. He couldn't deny the seductive draw and he actually hoped for an opportunity to inflict some pain of his own. Just as the Ba'al's Jaffa had on Sam.

The first blast came from their right and Daniel ducked instinctively, crouching down onto the balls of his feet and whirling simultaneously, bringing his weapon up to his shoulder. Squeezing off a few rounds in the direction he thought the shot had come from, Daniel could only hope he was firing in the right direction, the underbrush concealing any attacking force.

As more flashes of staff weapon fire erupted around them, Teal'c realized they were under attack from two separate directions.

"Kent, Colonel Carter, left flank!"

His orders were followed immediately, Sam and Kent pivoting to face the incoming fire opposite Daniel and Teal'c. Garrett reached up for his radio, reporting the enemy contact to Colonel Reynolds and the team at the 'gate.

The weapon's fire continued to erupt all around the team as they frantically returned that fire, but the thick foliage reduced their visibility to near zero. They had to find a way to even the odds.

"Garrett, take my position!" Teal'c cried, moving to his left as the Lieutenant took his place. "Hold position here! Colonel Carter, with me!"

Teal'c and Sam dropped down and began to battle crawl out of their position. Moving as quickly as they were able, they moved in a circular route around the battle, until they could hear the staff weapon fire now coming from their right rather than in front. Using hand signals, Teal'c instructed Sam to move ahead of him and then turn sharply right as they attempted to position themselves to attack the Jaffa flank.

A sudden glint of sunlight on armor drew their attention. Sam worked her way into place and raised her weapon, carefully sighting in on the nearest Jaffa warrior. At Teal'c's signal they both opened fire, taking down three Jaffa before the rest of the patrol recognized what was happening and split their force to meet the new threat.

Sam continued to fire into the Jaffa, squeezing off short bursts from her P-90 as Teal'c raised himself up on his knees and lobbed a grenade into their midst. The explosion came only seconds later, raining down debris over them. As the dust settled, Sam realized the weapon's fire from the Jaffa had trailed off to near nothing, then stopped altogether.

Teal'c raised his head, peering intently through the haze.

"Remain here. I will scout ahead and try to drive them toward you and the others."

Sam nodded, brushing the clinging dust and dirt away from her mouth and nose. She took a moment to check her ammunition supply, readying her weapon for another assault. A minute later the sound of staff weapon fire split the air, but Sam couldn't be sure who was firing, Teal'c or Ba'al's Jaffa. The smell of burning wood and flesh reached her nose and she knew someone had been hit. But who?

Suddenly the brush in front of her exploded into motion as two armored Jaffa burst through, bearing down rapidly on her position. Sam didn't hesitate, opening fire on them as they fled, cutting them down and leaving them bleeding on the forest floor.

The satisfaction was immense, but couldn't equal her relief. She'd faced the threat alone and had been victorious. She felt as though she could finally breathe as the weight was lifted from her shoulders.

Sam lowered her weapon, but not her eyes as she scanned the trees intently, looking for any sign of either Teal'c or the Jaffa. A wisp of movement caught her attention and Sam darted her eyes toward it. Something or someone was working his way toward her position, she sighted her weapon on the movement and waited, her heart hammering in her ears.

"Colonel Carter."

Teal'c's baritone voice had never been more welcome and Sam breathed a short sigh of relief.

"Teal'c. You okay?"

"I am. I could find no more sign of the patrol."

"Let's hope their buddies aren't anywhere nearby."

"Indeed," Teal'c agreed, leaning down to offer Sam and hand up. She dusted herself off, then fell into step behind him as they moved to rejoin the rest of their team.

Sam keyed her mic, "Bravo 2 to Bravo 3, come in."

"Bravo 3, we copy you Colonel," Lieutenant Garrett replied, his voice slightly strained.

"We're on our way back. Eighty-six one Jaffa patrol."

"Roger that."

Teal'c and Sam found the rest of the team on edge but intact, Daniel the first to greet them.

"Hey, you two okay?"

"We're fine, Daniel. But we've got to keep moving. Those guys definitely weren't the only patrol out here. There's bound to be more of 'em."

"That's pretty much a sure thing." Daniel's expressive face creased in concern. They'd been lucky so far and hadn't lost anyone. He sure as hell didn't want to start now.

Teal'c scanned the area before motioning to the rest of the team. "Lieutenant Kent, take us the rest of the way."

"Yes, Sir."

The team resumed their positions, without the need for silence they were able to move much more quickly through the forest than before. In only a few short minutes, Lieutenant Kent threw up a hand to call a halt and then dropped to one knee. Motioning toward his eyes and then straight in front of him, he indicated that they had finally reached their objective.

Teal'c moved forward to get a better look at the defenses. The open area between the tree line and the temple walls was heavily patrolled by approximately a dozen Jaffa, most likely ordered to remain behind under any circumstances. It was here that the former First Prime would learn if his plan for penetrating the temple was a sound one.

The team had drilled this part of the mission repeatedly for the last two weeks and could perform their jobs without conscious thought. Teal'c signaled once and Kent and Garrett peeled away from the rest of the team, keeping to the tree line and out of sight of the Jaffa.

Teal'c watched them go, glancing at his watch to mark the time. They had three minutes to wait. To Daniel it felt like an eternity. Never before had three minutes seemed to pass so slowly and he found himself nearly counting his heartbeats to pass the time. When Teal'c's had came up as the ready signal he nearly gasped with relief.

The timing was perfect. Teal'c's hand dropped at nearly the same instant an explosion ripped through the still air, causing the Jaffa to jerk in surprise. Orders were shouted and warriors began running in reaction, leaving only two behind to cover the side of the building Sam, Daniel, and Teal'c knew to house the doorway inside.

Sam slid the selector on her weapon from full auto to single shot and took careful aim. Slowing her breathing, she exhaled then smoothly pulled the trigger, felling one of the Jaffa. Before his body impacted the ground Teal'c also squeezed off a single shot, dropping the other warrior where he stood. They were both dead before they hit the ground.

SG-1 rose together and moved toward the entryway they had discovered on their first trip to -035. Daniel quickly keyed the sequence on the door and it obediently slid open. Teal'c entered first, his sharp eyes noting the lack of Jaffa in the immediate vicinity of the doorway. Shaking his head at the mistake he never would have made, Teal'c led the way down the corridor toward the laboratory Sam and Daniel had discovered during the first mission followed closely by Sam, Daniel covered the rear.

Moving cautiously, ears cocked for any sound that would indicate they had been discovered, the team moved swiftly down the hallway. The smell of mold and sweat slammed into Sam like a physical force combined to twist her stomach into a hard knot of anxiety. The further they moved into the structure the more the sight and smell of the place revolted her and she had to fight the nearly overwhelming urge to turn and run.

Pausing momentarily, Sam squeezed her eyes tightly shut and swallowed hard against the bile that had risen into her throat, nearly choking her. Opening them again, she met Daniel's very concerned gaze. He raised a questioning eyebrow as if to say _Are you okay?_ Sam pasted what she hoped was a reassuring look on her face and nodded, setting off again, hustling to catch up with Teal'c who had slowed at the intersection of two corridors.

The big Jaffa glanced over his shoulder, then motioned and they set off to the left. Sam knew they were close. She could almost taste it on the back of her tongue. Fear. Blood. Agony. The room where she'd spent hour upon endless hour in terror and pain. It was almost more than she could bear to be so close to it again. Teal'c was abreast of the doorway, the primal urge to scream warring against her rational mind that begged for silence lest they be caught and the torture began all over again.

Daniel's hand descended on her shoulder and Sam jumped, sucking in a startled breath. Daniel opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off by Sam's hand clamping over his lips, an urgent look on her face. Daniel cocked his head, listening intently as the faint sound of clomping feet reached his ears. _Jaffa._

Teal'c had stopped just ahead of them and motioned them against the wall, taking cover in the meager doorway. Sam's heart nearly stopped as she realized exactly what doorway she and Daniel were standing in.

Biting down hard on her lip, she tasted the metallic tang of blood in her mouth. _Blood. In my eyes, in my mouth. Pain. No more! No more!_ Her breathing began to quicken and for a moment Sam felt as though she were on the verge of a full blown panic attack. Until Daniel's hand reached out and grasped hers firmly, grounding her to the here and now.

The clank of armored feet grew louder and they realized they weren't going to be able to hide there much longer without risking detection. Daniel turned toward the door, looking for the controls that would open it and allow them to slip inside. Even if there were Jaffa on the other side, they would have the advantage of surprise and wouldn't be caught out in the open corridor.

Motioning to Teal'c and then to the door, Daniel raised his eyebrows in question. Teal'c nodded once and Daniel pushed Sam to one side of the doorway and quickly keyed the sequence of glyphs that would open the door. Sam paled noticeably when she realized just what it was Daniel was doing, but she didn't stop him. She knew she was going to have to face this. Face the inside of that room. And if it saved their lives, facing it and her fear would be worth what it was going to cost her.

The door slid soundlessly open and Teal'c peered around the doorframe before motioning them inside. Daniel led the way, training his weapon on all four corners of the room. It was empty, save a small chair placed in the center of the room.

Sam pressed herself against the wall just inside the doorway, her eyes never leaving the chair. _Torture. Agony. I don't know! No more! Carter, Samantha. Lieutenant Colonel..._ Blood still stained the floor to either side of the chair. She couldn't tell if it was her blood or the blood of some other poor soul who had been interrogated in here.

Teal'c swept the room. It was a small chamber, perhaps only twelve feet square, the only furniture the low chair at its center. He turned, leaning in close to the door, his ear pressed to its surface as he strained to listen to the Jaffa as they passed by their hiding place. The unmistakable sound of clanking armor and clomping Jaffa boots drew closer until they were just on the other side of the door, then ever so slowly began to recede as the Jaffa moved on without pause.

Daniel rolled his eyes closed, the relief washing over him in a palpable wave. They hadn't heard or seen them. They were safe, for now. He drug his eyes open again only to see Sam, still frozen where she had stood just after entering the room.

"Sam?" Daniel whispered harshly, unwilling to press their luck by raising his voice much louder. "Sam, you okay?"

Sam couldn't tear her eyes away from that god damned chair. The hours she had spent in it coming back to her in one long flood of torture filled memories. She couldn't move. Couldn't breathe. There was only this room, and that chair. She didn't hear Daniel's question.

Daniel wasn't sure exactly what was happening with his teammate, but it was obviously something about this room that had closed her off from them. Shooting a concerned look at Teal'c, he slowly approached Sam, putting himself between her and the chair she was staring at fixedly.

"Sam, look at me. It's Daniel. You okay?" When he received no response, Daniel became truly alarmed, for the first time wondering at Teal'c's wisdom when he insisted Sam be included on this mission.

Teal'c stepped in, his deep voice soft but commanding. "Colonel Carter, you must look at me. We have a mission to complete. Colonel Carter, do you hear me?"

Sam could feel her breath now coming in frantic pants as she struggled for control. She forced her eyes closed. Forced herself to break eye contact with the room and the chair. Forced herself to hear the voices of her teammates. Teal'c was saying something. An order. _Yes, Sir. Follow orders. Complete the mission._ Sam pried her eyes open millimeter by millimeter, turning her head to look Teal'c in the eye.

His gaze was uneasy, his eyes full of concern. Sam forced a deep breath, then another as her heart rate finally began to slow.

"I'm okay. I'm fine," Sam said, the automatic response falling easily from her lips. But she didn't think she was fine. Not by a long shot. Neither did her teammates.

Daniel glanced around the room, searching for a reason for Sam's behavior when his gaze fell on the dark stains on the floor and the edges of the chair's wooden seat. _Dear God. It was here. Right here in this very room._

"You've been in here before, haven't you? In this room?" Daniel asked quietly.

Sam looked up in surprise, her eyes wide, fear shining clearly in them. It was an emotion she didn't enjoy and allowed to show even less. There was no point in denying it, after her reaction on seeing this place again.

Sam nodded, dropping her eyes to study her boots. "Yeah," she said softly, barely a whisper. "I can handle it. I'll be fine."

Daniel nodded, but looked skeptical. He had never, in all the years they had known each other, seen Sam freeze up while in the field. Never. Now that it had happened, he was quite frankly unnerved by it all.

"You're sure?"

Sam drew in a breath, running a shaking hand through her hair. "Yeah. There's just one thing I need to do first. Teal'c, can you hear anyone out there?"

The former First Prime leaned his sensitive ear back down to the door, then shook his head. "I cannot."

Sam nodded, then forced herself to take a step away from the supporting wall, then forced herself to take another until she was standing directly in front of the chair that had become a symbol of all she had endured at the hands of Ba'al's Jaffa. She then raised a booted foot and brought it down swiftly on the seat of the chair, executing a well placed hammer kick that splintered the chair nearly in half. Sam raised the her weapon over her head and brought down the stock smartly on top of the remains of the chair, severing it into several jagged pieces.

Sam could feel the rage and grief bubbling to the surface as she allowed herself a physical vent to her emotions. When she had finished and the chair lay in a broken pile, she could sense the world slowly righting itself around her. A sense of equilibrium that she had barely noticed was gone, slowly returned.

Sam raised her eyes, met Teal'c's and saw approval reflected back at her. He simply nodded once, then turned to key open the door. They still had a mission to complete.

Sam deliberately turned her back on the splintered wood lying in the middle of the room, fishing in her vest she pulled out a small brick of C-4. Walking to the doorway she pressed the explosive into the wall over the control panel and inserted a detonator, arming it with the flick of a switch. When the weapon's lab blew, so would this room.

Looking back at Daniel and Teal'c, Sam felt steadier, vindicated in a way she hadn't expected and more herself than she had in weeks. "Let's do this. And go home."

Taking up her position on Teal'c's six with Daniel following, Sam felt as though she had finally come home.

To be Continued...


	19. Chapter Nineteen

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Nineteen**

Jack sat behind his desk, a stack of paperwork lay untouched in his inbox, his attention continually wandering out his window to the idle Stargate beyond. If he could will time to move faster he would have, without hesitation. Waiting for the mission to -035 to be completed had become an excruciating exercise in patience. It wasn't something he generally did well. In this case the waiting had become an almost physical pain.

Jack pulled back his sleeve to look at his watch, again. He knew that by now, if the team had been able to stay on their timetable, they should have secured the 'gate area and Teal'c's advance strike team should be well on their way to the temple. The plan had not entailed sending anyone back through until the operation was completed, unless they were unable to achieve their first objective, to secure the 'gate, or someone was seriously injured and needed the medical facilities available at the SGC. The fact that they hadn't received any contact with -035 requesting assistance with casualties boded well, but didn't alleviate his fears entirely.

Mentally running through the plan, Jack could almost picture where each member of the team was at that moment, and for the hundredth time that day wished to God he wasn't the base commander and instead had been with them. It wasn't the first time he regretted his decision to take over command of the SGC. At the time it seemed like the right decision, he just hadn't bargained on how hard it was going to be to stay behind.

Jack knew there were things that required his attention; work that needed to be accomplished, but he couldn't muster the energy to deal with it all right now. Instead, he allowed his mind to drift, wandering aimlessly through random thoughts and memories until one golden afternoon came to mind and he focused on the remembrance as it filled him with the pleasant warmth of remembrance.

_The weekend had been long in coming, the usual five day week feeling as though it had been extended to twice it's normal length. Jack had been looking forward to Friday more so than most weeks, mainly since he had made plans to spend some time with Sam on Saturday._

_It had been years since Jack O'Neill, career military man, had looked forward to the end of his work week, and the sensation was somewhat foreign, but not at all unpleasant. The anticipation of enjoying a Saturday afternoon in Garden of the Gods with Sam had Jack up and out of bed before 8 am and prowling the house looking for something to keep himself occupied for the next three hours until he could legitimately leave to pick her up. He felt something like a teenager again, going out on his first date, but couldn't seem to help himself._

_He knew what was happening, but didn't dare attempt to put what he was feeling into words for fear that it might disappear under the weight of a name. But the tiny smiles that seemed to sneak up on him at inopportune times, the little flip of his stomach anytime his home phone rang, were all indications he couldn't ignore._

_He had arrived little more than fifteen minutes early, and found Sam already dressed and ready to leave, a lunch packed and ready by the door._

"_I thought we might stop and eat while we're out there. I know a great little out of the way spot with a killer view," Sam said, a shy smile gracing her mouth._

_The killer view had turned out to be a spot off the normal hiking path that took them up a ways to a point where the landscape seemed to stretch out forever in front of them. Jack had thought he had seen most of the more scenic places in and around Colorado Springs, but this was truly spectacular. The deep reds of the Garden contrasted with the vivid blue of the cloudless sky combined for a vision that would soften the heart of the most hardened cynic._

"_Whoa. You weren't kidding when you said it was a killer view, were ya?" Jack murmured._

_Sam laughed softly. "This is one of my favorite places. I used to come up here whenever I could get away for an afternoon. Don't seem to have as much time for it lately."_

"_Well, we'll have to say something to your boss. Get him to back off on the work load a bit."_

"_Yeah, well, my boss is a pretty good guy. Well, one of my bosses. He fixed me up with a great job that let me stay in Colorado. And I'm not sure I can ever really thank him for that."_

"_From what I hear, it wasn't like he didn't have some selfish reasons of his own for making that happen."_

_Sam smiled as she pulled out the lunch she had packed. "Well, thank you anyway. Really."_

_Jack reached out and pulled Sam's hand into his own. "You're welcome. Really."_

_They enjoyed the meal in relative silence, taking in the spectacular scenery as they ate. By the time they finished, Sam was pleasantly relaxed, reclining up against a large boulder next to Jack as they watched the sun slowly dip through the cloudless afternoon sky._

"_This was really nice, today," Sam said softly. "We really should do this sort of stuff more often. No work. No crises. Just a nice, quiet afternoon."_

"_Yeah, it was. And you're right, we should." Jack reached over and snaked an arm around Sam's shoulders and pulled her closer, her head resting on his shoulder. The contentment he felt, sitting there with Sam in his arms, surprised him. After all that had happened over the last several years, he never thought he could find happiness again. And yet, here it was, offered to him without reservation. What could he do but accept it?_

_Turning his head, Jack brushed his lips across the top of Sam's head, squeezing her slightly before relaxing again._

"_Thank you, Sam."_

"_What for?"_

"_For saying yes to that first night out."_

_Sam chuckled softly. "No need to thank me for that. I think that might have been the easiest thing I ever did."_

"_Well, at least one of us had an easy time with that."_

"_Huh?"_

"_You have no idea how long I worked to figure out some way to ask you out."_

"_How did you finally come up with it?"_

"_Ah… well… I didn't, actually."_

"_You didn't? Don't tell me, you asked Daniel."_

"_Give me some credit, okay? I don't ask Daniel about everything. I actually gave up trying to plan out what I was going to say and just dialed the phone. I figured I usually work pretty well when I'm on the spot. I'd think of something once I was actually talking to you."_

_Sam laughed, her shoulders shaking under his hand._

"_It's not that funny."_

"_Jack, that is you, through and through. And yes, it is that funny."_

"_Yeah well… anyway. Worked out, didn't it?"_

"_Yes, it did. Better than I could have dreamed, actually."_

"_Yeah. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. Like your Dad to show up and kick my ass or something."_

"_Dad would never do that."_

"_Easy for you to say, it's not your ass he'd want to kick."_

"_Dad likes you more than he lets on. There aren't too many people he'd let get away with calling him 'Dad'."_

"_Really?"_

"_Really. Trust me on this."_

"_Yeah, well, still not the same thing. It's one thing to like someone, it's a totally different story when they start dating your only daughter."_

"_Relax, Jack. I'm sure Dad'll be fine with it. Once I'm able to tell him," Sam trailed off wistfully. It had been months since she'd seen or heard from her Father. Once the separation wouldn't have bothered her at all, she'd gone longer without any contact with him. But over the last few years, as their relationship had become much closer, Sam began to feel the stretches of silence more deeply._

"_I'm sure we'll hear from him again before too much longer. The… organization he belongs to will need us for something eventually and then they'll come knocking, just like always."_

"_I know. It's just been so long since I've heard from him."_

"_I'm sure he's just fine. Jacob seems to have a knack for surviving," Jack said, rubbing Sam's arm reassuringly._

"_I know. I'll just feel better once we've heard from him."_

"_So. You ready to head back?"_

"_Not really. Best part about this spot is the sunset."_

_And so they sat, as the sun dipped beneath the horizon, casting the Garden into burnished golds and reds. The pressures of work and the war with the Goa'uld were far from their minds. The sunset view reserved just for them and as Jack glanced over at Sam, her face and hair seeming to glow with the golden hues of the setting sun, he was struck by her radiance. In that perfect moment, he knew there was no place else he wanted to be. _

Jack pulled himself from his daydream. It was approaching 0930 hours, time for the team's first status check. Reynolds would be dialing the 'gate any moment with a report. It was a bit unusual for a field team to check in with the SGC frequently while on a mission, but this operation was different. The fate of the planet hung in the balance. If it appeared as though they were going to need reinforcements, that information had to be relayed immediately to the SGC where a secondary team was on stand by, ready to deploy at a moment's notice.

Almost at the stroke of 0930 the 'gate began to spin, chevrons simultaneously flashing the dull red that indicated an incoming wormhole.

"Off world activation. General O'Neill to the control room."

Jack nearly sprang up from his seat, descending the stairs at a fast trot just as the seventh chevron locked in place and the wormhole burst open.

Sergeant Harriman never looked up from his console, but seemed to instinctively know the General was behind him and began his report.

"It's Colonel Reynolds, Sir."

"Let's hear it."

"Yes, Sir," Harriman replied, flipping a switch to transfer the transmission to the overhead speakers.

"Alpha leader to Sierra Golf Charlie, come in please."

"This is O'Neill, go ahead Alpha leader."

"Secondary objective secured, Sir. Bravo team on schedule to secure and eliminate the primary objective. Two wounded. No casualties to report."

"Your wounded need to be brought through and replaced?"

"The Lieutenants would prefer to stay here, Sir. Couple of staff burns, the Doc says they're good to go."

_Lieutenants. So not... _The tension that had been riding in Jack's gut since the team had stepped through the 'gate thirty minutes ago loosened at the report and he breathed a sigh of relief. _No casualties. They're okay. Thank God._

"Understood. We'll check in again in another thirty. Call if you need anything."

"Wilco, Sir. Alpha leader, out."

"Shut it down, Sergeant," Jack ordered, turning to climb the stairs back to his office, preparing to wait out another thirty agonizing minutes. The first, and to his mind most dangerous, hurdle had been cleared and so far they'd been incredibly lucky. To go from projections of five to fifteen percent casualties to none in the first wave was amazing. He could only hope that their luck would continue to hold.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Creeping silently down the deserted hallway, Teal'c kept his sensitive hearing tuned to the sounds around them, seeking any indication that there might be trouble ahead. They had been moving slowly but steadily for several minutes, cautious not to make too much noise or move too quickly and risk detection.

Sam felt as though she'd been freed from a restraint jacket and was finally able to move and breathe again. She couldn't have imagined that simply facing that damned room would have been so cathartic, but she wasn't about to argue with the result. Focusing her attention on the corridor ahead, she was barely aware of the dull sound of machinery ahead and knew they were getting close.

Teal'c paused just before the conjunction of two hallways and eased himself down on one knee before peering around the corner. The opposite corridor appeared empty and he signaled behind him to Sam and Daniel that he was going to turn down the right hand passage. Sam and Daniel both nodded, keeping their eyes roving in all directions, ever vigilant that they could be discovered at any moment.

Teal'c again led the way. If their assumptions and recollections about the inside of the temple had been correct, the laboratory they sought was only a few yards down the hallway. Pressing himself against the corridor wall, he moved silently toward their objective. If all went well, they would be in and out in moments and headed toward the 'gate in just a few minutes, the temple laboratory would blow just about the time they reached Reynolds and the rest of the team.

Slowing to a stop as he reached the doorway they had targeted, Teal'c lowered himself to a knee and glanced over his shoulder at Sam. She nodded and pulled a small instrument from her vest pocket. Similar to the device she had used when they had discovered the crystal skull on P6X-011, the hope was that whatever energy this weapon used, it would be powerful enough and similar enough to other technologies they had encountered to be detectable on Sam's equipment.

Adjusting the controls, Sam searched for any indications that there was a power source nearby capable of fueling a weapon that could wipe out entire cities. When she was researching a way to detect the energy, she surmised that any weapon that could do what this weapon purportedly could do would need tremendous amounts of energy. Amounts of energy that should be detectable, especially this close.

Cycling through the various ranges of radiation and energy spectrums, the readout barely flickered and Sam was beginning to wonder if her assumptions were wrong and they wouldn't be able to detect the weapon as easily as they had hoped. She was nearly through the gamma band and ready to move onto the next series of checks when the indication suddenly spiked and continued to escalate off the scale. Sam's eyes widened at the readings. There was definitely an intense power source on the other side of the wall.

Sam looked up, caught Teal'c's eye and gave him a thumbs up. Teal'c nodded and rose, positioning himself on the opposite wall from the door, making room for Daniel who slid into position to key the door latch from alongside the doorway where he would be unseen by anyone inside. Sam moved to take up her position next to Teal'c where they would be in a position to fire into the room, but would not be directly in the line of fire themselves.

Teal'c pulled a Jaffa stun grenade from his vest and armed it, then raised his arm, looking directly at Sam and then Daniel. Receiving nods of acknowledgement from both, he dropped his hand and prepared to lob the grenade into the room. Daniel smoothly punched the keys to open the door then turned hurriedly away from the open doorway. Teal'c tossed in the grenade and then he too turned away from the brilliant flash of light as the grenade detonated and hopefully incapacitated anyone in the room.

As the flash faded from her awareness, Sam allowed her eyes to open a fraction as she raised her weapon into position and gazed into the lab. She could see several benches and low tables strewn with pieces of zat'nikatels, staff weapons, and power crystals, but no Jaffa. Easing herself further into the doorway, Sam was tense with anticipation, wary that Jaffa could still be on them in a moment if they weren't careful.

Glancing over at Teal'c, Sam nodded and waved a hand signaling her position was 'all clear' and saw him mimic the gesture. They both moved silently and swiftly into the room, training their weapons at each corner until they were satisfied that no conscious Jaffa were in the vicinity.

Teal'c dug the toe of his boot into the side of an unconscious warrior and rolled him over onto his back. There were only two of them in the room, they were definitely Ba'al's Jaffa and were definitely out cold. Daniel had followed them into the room, but continued to keep his attention on the corridor as he activated the key pad and closed the door.

Sam had lowered her weapon and had her scanner cradled in her hand as she swept the room. The weapon was definitely in here somewhere, but wasn't exactly out in the open. Nothing she had seen so far looked like any sort of weapon of mass destruction. She tuned the instrument again, tightening the range until she could use it as a homing beacon to zero in on the power source they were looking for.

Pivoting slowly around the room, Sam scanned carefully. She had expected the power source to be large enough that it would be immediately recognizable, but so far she'd only seen the usual Goa'uld technology present. Running her eyes along the workbenches and tables, Sam noted a number of zat'nikatels and staff weapons in various stages of repair.

Just as she was about to turn toward the center of the room, the glint of a Goa'uld hand device caught her eye and she turned back. Picking it up, she noticed immediately that it was slightly bulkier than the hand device they had back at the SGC. An odd extra control button had been installed near the wrist of the device, giving the device its additional weight. Sam absently tucked the weapon between her jacket and her vest, hoping to get it back to the SGC where she could study it further.

The lab wasn't all that big, perhaps slightly larger than her own lab quarters at the SGC. There simply weren't too many places to hide or disguise the weapon. Taking a step further into the room, the meter on Sam's scanner twitched and then began to rise steadily as she came closer to the table at the center of the workspace.

"I think I've got it," Sam said, her voice low but still echoing slightly in the enclosed room. "There's something under this table that's giving off a helluva lot of energy and enough radiation that we shouldn't stay in here too long."

Daniel slid closer, running his eyes along the bottom and sides of the table, looking for something that would indicate a door or panel that would give them access to what was underneath. Walking slowly in a circle around the table, a slight imperfection in one panel caught his eye and he knelt down for a closer look.

"Sam, over here, this might be the way inside," Daniel said as he ran his fingers down a nearly imperceptible seam between two access panels. Nearly half way down the seam, his fingers ran across what felt like a small depression. Looking up as Sam dropped to one knee next to him, Daniel pointed to the seam.

"I think two panels come together along here, see it?"

"Yeah, I do. Any ideas how to open it?"

"I think so, there's a bit of a divot here," Daniel said, running his finger along the depression again. "I don't see any writings or markings, so I can't be sure."

"Well, we don't have much choice. We need to be sure about what's inside here. We can't afford to blow this room unless we're sure. If we're wrong and this isn't the weapon we won't get another shot at this."

Daniel nodded, took a deep breath and firmly pressed on the indentation. At first, nothing happened and he worried that he'd been wrong until the seam cracked apart abruptly and began to hiss.

"Crap!" Daniel spat between his teeth as he scrambled back and out of the way.

The table continued to hiss as the panels slid further apart until Sam thought she could probably squeeze her hand between them and force them the rest of the way open.

"I think we can probably force this open," she said, setting her scanner down on the floor and wedging her fingers between the panels and pulling for all she was worth. The crack opened further and Daniel was able to add his strength to Sam's, slowly sliding the panels apart; a faint glow could be seen from inside. The scanner on the floor began emitting a soft beeping as the panels were forced apart.

"Looks like we hit the mother lode here," Sam commented. "The scanner's well off the scale now and levels are still rising. We need to do this and get out of here."

The crack had widened enough to allow them a clear look inside. What they had assumed was a worktable was in fact the outer casing of the weapon itself. The panels they had man handled open were covering what looked like an operations panel, complete with glowing control crystals. Daniel leaned in for a better look.

"I think there's writing here, looks like Goa'uld," he murmured, mostly to himself as he studied the markings intently. Reading Goa'uld had been coming more and more easily to him over the last few years until now he could read it nearly as easily as Teal'c. Scanning the inscribed writings, Daniel's eyes widened.

"This looks like a 'cheat sheet' of sorts on how to manipulate the settings and activate the weapon."

"What does it say?"

"It looks like there's a way to vary the intensity of the blast. All the way up appears to be labeled as something close to fifty square miles, all the way down is closer to ten square feet."

"Do you see any way to set it up on an overload."

"I'm not sure. Maybe. But it'll take more time than we have to figure out."

The words were no more than out of Daniel's mouth when the door to the laboratory slid open and a young Jaffa entered the room.

"Tak ma'te…" he began before he realized that those in the room were not Jaffa and hurriedly pulled his zat from its holster. Sam and Daniel had their backs to him and were spinning to face the open door even as he leveled the weapon at them.

Teal'c was in a much better position, and was pulling up his staff weapon even as the Jaffa was arming the zat that was now in his hands. The entire exchange happened so quickly that at first Sam was unsure quite what had happened. Her P-90 was back in her hands, the Jaffa was lying on the ground, a smoking hole dominating his chest and Daniel was slumped over against her legs.

Sam drew in a couple of deep breaths, her eyes trained on the door waiting for someone else to burst in on them. Pulling her gaze away, she looked down at Daniel. He looked as though he had collapsed where he sat, his head resting against her leg, his arms flung out to his side. Reaching down, she gently shook his shoulder.

"Daniel? Come on, wake up for me here." Getting no response she lay two fingers on his neck, then called over her shoulder. "Teal'c, looks like he took a hit from that guy's zat. He's out cold and his pulse is a bit erratic. I'm not sure why, it was just a zat he was hit with, wasn't it?"

Teal'c pulled the weapon from the dead Jaffa's lifeless hand and examined it. "This has been altered in some way, I am unsure how. But this configuration is one I have not seen before."

"We should get the hell out of here. Get him back to the 'gate and get him checked out."

"Agreed. How much time do you need to set the explosives?"

"I'd like some time to study this further, but at least five minutes to be sure the entire room is wired to blow. You should get moving. You can get a good ways back to the 'gate in five minutes."

Teal'c pursed his lips into a thin line. Splitting up the team was hardly the way he wanted to execute this part of the mission.

"Take Daniel and head back. I'll be right behind you. I know my way out."

"We should not divide the team. I will remain and assist you. We will leave together."

"Let's set the charges then and get the hell outta here. Someone was bound to hear all the weapon's fire." Sam pulled a brick of C-4 out of her vest and pressed it securely inside the access panels, directly onto the slots that held the control crystals.

Teal'c pulled out his own supply of explosives, moving around to the opposite side of the casing and pressing the C-4 into place. They worked steadily, setting the charges carefully to ensure maximum destruction of the room and surrounding structure. They wanted to leave nothing to chance, placing enough C-4 to blow the room twice over. Just as Sam was setting the last one into the corner of the room near the doorway, a klaxon split the air.

"Oh hell," she cursed under her breath. "Looks like we just ran outta time. You done yet Teal'c?"

"Nearly. Two more and it will be complete."

"Give 'em to me, I'll take care of it and'll be right behind you. I won't be able to move as fast as you if I have to carry Daniel. And we need as much speed as possible. I'll catch up."

It only took Teal'c's tactical mind a moment to analyze the situation and realize that Sam was right.

"Agreed," he said, thrusting the C-4 into Sam's hands before bending down to heft Daniel's limp form over his shoulders.

Sam opened the doorway and trained her weapon first one direction then the other out the open hatch. Satisfied that no one was in the immediate vicinity, she nodded to Teal'c.

"All clear. Take the scanner, I'm not going to need it. We're pretty sure if they use the weapon the read out will peak over 15,000. If that happens, go on ahead without me." Sam pushed the instrument into Teal'c's pocket.

"I will be most displeased if you fail to meet us at the 'gate, Colonel Carter."

Sam gave him a wry smile. "Not this time, Teal'c. I'll be right behind you."

Teal'c turned without further comment and stepped around the doorway into the corridor. Sam waste any time and simply closed the door and immediately turned to place the remaining two charges. If everything went well, she'd be on her way to the 'gate in just another minute or two, the complex blowing sky high shortly thereafter.

She pushed the detonator into the second block of explosive and was about to enabled them when the door burst inward, blown into the room by a concentrated blast from a staff weapon.

Sam ducked down onto one knee instinctively, raising her weapon and squeezing off several rounds as the doorway filled with Jaffa. Firing constantly, Sam realized that there were simply too many of them for her to be able to stop them all. Using their comrades as shields, the Jaffa at the rear of the assault were able to breach the room. Two warriors moved to either side of her position, each closing in on her.

"Lay down your weapon, Tau'ri! There is no escape!" The cry echoed in from the corridor. It was a no win situation. If she took out either man in the room, the other would be on her in an instant. And even if she was lucky enough to take them both down, the others in the hallway would take her down.

Easing her hand away from the trigger, Sam allowed her P-90 to dangle from its harness. "Easy boys. Okay. Okay."

"Remove your weapon!"

Sam hesitated a moment before complying. She had to keep the Jaffa nearby and occupied. As long as they were focused on her, Teal'c and Daniel had a chance to escape. She estimated it had at most been two or three minutes since the guys had fled the compound. She could only hope they were far enough away.

Sam slowly lowered her weapon to the ground, using the motion to cover her actions as she palmed the remote in her hand. Running her fingers over the buttons on the remote she found the one she hoped would arm the portion of the C-4 they had planted by the doorway, she allowed her arms to drop to her sides, hoping the detonator would not be visible to the Jaffa.

If she was right, the Jaffa standing on either side of the doorway would be taken out by the blast and she should be at least partly shielded by the weapon's cabinet in the center of the room. If she was wrong, the whole place would go up, taking her along with it.

Either way, the Jaffa would be neutralized and the weapon would hopefully be damaged, if not destroyed.

"You will come with us, Tau'ri!" The Jaffa to her left bellowed as he took a step forward.

"Yeah well… I don't think so," Sam said defiantly as she thumbed the remote and dropped instantly to the floor, covering her head with her arms.

The roar was deafening. The ground shook beneath her, a deep rumble that seemed to roll right through her body. Sam had never been so close to a C-4 explosion before and never out in the open as she was now. She could feel the heat of the detonation skittering across the backs of her legs and arms and curled into a ball in an effort to shield herself.

Sam had time for one last thought as the very air seemed to catch fire. _Oh God… I was wrong… the whole room blew. I'm sorry, Jack._

To be Continued…


	20. Chapter Twenty

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Twenty**

Daniel began to stir just as Teal'c reached the doorway they had used to enter the temple. The disorientation of being suspended upside down over Teal'c's shoulders was enough to send his stomach spiraling up into this throat. Groaning, Daniel attempted to lift his head.

"Do not move, Daniel Jackson."

"Teal'c? Lemme down."

"One moment, we are nearly there."

Daniel swallowed hard as Teal'c's shoulder dug into his stomach.

"Teal'c, for the love of God, put me down before I puke all over your back."

Stopping just to one side of the doorway leading to the forest outside, Teal'c eased Daniel off his shoulders, steadying the younger man as he swayed slightly in place.

"Holy shit… what hit me?"

"A zat'nikatel."

"A zat? That's it, just a zat? You'd think I'd be used to those things by now."

"It appeared to be altered in some way. I have brought it with me for further study."

"Great, just my luck to get hit with a souped up zat," Daniel groused, rubbing his head absently as he looked around for the third member of their team. "Where's Sam?"

"The Jaffa set off the internal alarms. She stayed behind to set the final charges. We must move quickly. Will you need assistance?"

"Just give me a minute to get my breath, I'll be fine."

The dull rumble sounded at first like distant thunder but grew in intensity until the ground beneath their feet shook with it. Daniel lost his footing, tumbling to the ground in a heap as Teal'c struggled to keep upright, clinging to the smooth walls for support.

"What the hell is that?" Daniel called out, his voice nearly swallowed in the rumble of the explosion.

"The lab!"

"My God, Sam's still back there isn't she?"

"I do not know. Get out, Daniel Jackson. Get to the trees and signal Colonel Reynolds. Advise him of the situation. I'm going back for Colonel Carter."

"The hell I will! I'm going with. I'm not going to leave either of you behind. Not this time!"

Teal'c ground his teeth in frustration. He didn't have the luxury of standing there arguing with Daniel. If he was going to find Colonel Carter, he was rapidly running out of time. The explosion would undoubtedly draw any remaining Jaffa patrols and personnel to the lab and he didn't have the firepower to take them all out, even with Daniel's help.

"With me, but we must hurry."

Daniel only nodded, pulling himself shakily to his feet. He felt far from 100, but that wasn't going to stop him. He was going back for her, even if it meant bringing back her body. He wasn't going to leave anyone behind ever again.

As they made their way down the corridor, the temple continued to shake. If all the C-4 they had planted in the lab had been detonated, it was unlikely they would find anyone left alive. But he had sworn an oath to O'Neill. He couldn't go back on that oath now, no matter the consequences. He vowed to bring Samantha home, and that was what he was going to do.

They had gone only a few feet when the rumbling ceased and a roiling, acrid smoke filled the corridor. Both men feared the worst, but neither would give voice to that fear. Speaking it aloud would make it real and the reality of those fears was something they sought to avoid.

They moved swiftly back the way they had come only moments before until an urgent beeping from Teal'c's pocket brought him up short and he pulled the scanner out to peer at the readout.

Daniel nearly crashed into him from behind. "What the hell are you doing? Why are we stopping?"

Teal'c didn't answer, but simply stared at the instrument in his hands. The reading was unmistakable. There was no reason to go back. He was sure of it now. He held out the scanner to Daniel who looked at it uncomprehendingly.

"Yeah, 15,894 units. So what? Why aren't we moving? Sam's still back there!"

"No, Daniel Jackson. She is not."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"The reading on this scanner. If it reached a level over 15,000, it would indicate the weapon had been activated. Even if she survived the explosion, Colonel Carter is dead. She could not have survived the weapon."

Daniel looked around dazedly. _No, no this can't be happening. Not again. Dear God, not again…_ His face brightened, "If that's the case, why aren't we dead too? Shouldn't we be dead?"

"You deciphered the weapon yourself, Daniel Jackson. It was possible to limit the effects of the weapon to a single room. We should turn back. We need to get to a minimum safe distance and I will attempt to detonate the remaining C-4."

"What makes you think there's any C-4 left?"

"If the entire laboratory had been destroyed, then the weapon could not have been activated after the explosion. There must be explosives left inside. We must complete our mission, we must detonate the rest of the lab and destroy the weapon before Ba'al can use it on Earth."

Daniel leaned wearily against the wall, suddenly feeling more exhausted than he could ever remember. It was all too much. Rationally, he knew that Teal'c was saying was right. They had a planet to protect. But they also had a teammate to protect and he had failed in that, again. He wasn't sure that making it out of the temple and back to the SGC was something he still wanted.

Making his decision quickly, he pushed off from the wall and turned toward the lab.

"I'm going back. I have to be sure, Teal'c. What if she got out? What if she wasn't in the room when the weapon went off? I can't leave until I know for sure. You go on. If I'm not out in fifteen minutes, blow the C-4."

Going back was something the former First Prime wanted desperately, and Daniel had just given him an excuse to do just that. He too had to know for certain.

"Come, we don't have much time," Teal'c said, taking the lead as he jogged down the corridor, trusting that Daniel would be right behind him. One way or another that lab would be destroyed, but he owed it to Colonel Carter to be totally sure of her fate before he fulfilled his duty. A grim silence followed the two men as they ran through the smoke clogged hallway, each fearful that what they would find would change them, forever.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

The Stargate began to spin, jerking Jack's attention away from his inbox.

"Unscheduled off world activation! Unscheduled off world activation! General O'Neill to the control room!"

Jack was nearly down the stairs before Sergeant Harriman had finished speaking. "Report, Sergeant."

"It's Colonel Reynolds, Sir."

"They're twelve minutes early."

"Yes, Sir. On screen."

"Colonel Reynolds, report."

There was an intense burst of static before Reynolds' face materialized on the command center view screens.

"We believe there's been a detonation, Sir."

"You believe? You're not sure?"

"No, Sir. We're not. But that's not all. The weapon was discharged. Our equipment when ape shit about three minutes ago. According to Garrett, the only thing that would account for the spike in energy readings would be a discharge from that weapon. They set the goddamned thing off."

Jack was stunned, took an involuntary step backward from the control room monitors. He wanted with every fiber of his being at that very moment to run and hide in the deepest hole he could find and never come out; never face what was happening. But he couldn't. He was the General.

"How…" his voice broke on the word and he cleared his throat before continuing. "How many were inside?"

The expression that passed briefly over Colonel Reynolds' face was one of profound loss and pain, an expression only someone who had lost men and women in battle could possibly recognize or understand. Jack had seen it too damned many times over the course of his career.

"The advance team was inside, Sir. We haven't been able to raise them."

_The advance team. Teal'c, Daniel, Sam. Oh God, no._

The other shoe had finally dropped and O'Neill felt as though it had hit him squarely on the head. Jack allowed his head to drop between his shoulder blades, slick tendrils of nausea licking at the back of his throat. _I let her go. Christ Almighty, I let her go._

Jack forced himself to raise his head, knowing that all eyes were on him. How he handled the next few minutes may well determine how well his team dealt with the disintegration of the operation. Sucking in a couple of deep breaths, Jack forced the grief and pain to the back of his mind, he simply couldn't deal with it right now. Once he was alone and he would give vent to the rage. But not before. For now, he cloaked himself with the rigid military bearing he had relied on throughout his years in the Air Force.

"Colonel Reynolds."

"Here, Sir. I've ordered the back up team to displace from the 'gate. They're ready to move in."

Jack paused for a moment. Ordering good men and women into a deadly situation weighed heavily on him, but they had no choice. It was between the billions of people on Earth and the lives of one SG strike team; in the end the choice was gut wrenchingly simple.

"Get them moving, Colonel. We need that weapon knocked out. Find a way to create a distraction. See if you can draw some of those Jaffa out away from the temple. That might buy your second team some time."

"Yes, Sir. On our way."

"Colonel, make it happen."

"Aye, Sir. Will do."

Reynolds broke the connection with the SGC and turned to signal his team. This time he would lead them himself. There was no way they were going to fail in this mission. It simply wasn't an outcome he was going to accept.

"Alright people, you heard the General. Let's do this."

Setting off in single file, staggered slightly to avoid making themselves an easy target, the team moved into the treeline. Each knew their jobs and knew what needed to be done. And each resolved that the sacrifices that had already been made would not have been in vain.

To be continued…

_Author's note: I really must apologize for the cliff hanger here. Never fear, I'm working on the next chapter right now and hope to have it posted by the end of the weekend._


	21. Chapter Twenty One

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Twenty-One**

As they got closer to the lab, Teal'c and Daniel moved more slowly, afraid they would miss some sign of Sam in the smoke and dim light. As the minutes stretched on and they drew closer and closer to the epicenter of the explosion, Teal'c's cynicism grew. If Colonel Carter had been able to exit the laboratory, they should have found her by now.

The corridor became progressively more smoke filled the closer they came to the lab. Pieces of the stone walls cluttered the floor, the destruction more extreme the further they traveled. Daniel had seen devastation before, but the sight of the walls ripped apart terrified him. If Sam had been caught in the explosion, he didn't see a way she could have possibly survived.

They were nearly to the doorway of the lab when Daniel lay a hand on Teal'c's arm, drawing him to a stop.

"You don't think she's all the way back here, do you? We must've missed her somewhere back there," Daniel said, gesturing over his shoulder back down the hallway.

"I do not believe so, Daniel Jackson. We should have seen something if she indeed was able to fully exit the room. I will enter first, remain here for a count of five and then follow."

"Okay," Daniel replied, raising his weapon to a ready position.

Teal'c brought his staff weapon up, leveling it as he entered the lab. He was stunned to discover the damage outside the room was much more severe than what he found inside. The force of the explosion seemed to be focused around the doorway, which was where he found the armor of two Jaffa lying to either side of where he stood. It appeared as though the weapon worked exactly as they had surmised, destroying flesh and blood but leaving all else behind.

Smoke continued to fill the air as the furniture and equipment the room housed continued to burn. Peering carefully through the thick, hazy air, Teal'c scanned for any indication that his teammate had survived. Easing his way around the debris, the air slowly cleared in front of him and Teal'c caught a glimpse of a pair of SGC issue boots and his heart froze in his chest.

"Daniel Jackson. I have found something."

Daniel was at his side in an instant, disbelief written across his features.

"My God… Sam," he whispered, brokenly. As Teal'c was bending to kneel down, a flash of blond caught Daniel's eye and he gasped aloud.

"Teal'c, look!" Daniel exclaimed, his eyes widening. "She wasn't caught in the blast from the weapon! It's Sam!" But even as he said it, Daniel realized something wasn't quite right. Every few seconds he glimpsed a strange blue and green aura that enveloped Sam's body, fluctuating and dancing across her form like a living thing. Daniel reached out to touch her, but pulled back at the last moment.

"What the hell is that?"

"I do not know, Daniel Jackson. It appears to be a Goa'uld personal shield, but I have not seen one like this before. It is giving off an energy and is differently colored than the one Apophis used."

"You mean a hand device?"

"Indeed." Teal'c slowly reached out, consciously pushing his way through the shield, penetrating its energy barrier to grasp Sam's arm and roll her slowly over. Feeling his way down her arm, Teal'c searched for the hand device he was sure was covering Sam's hand and wrist. His fingers encountered the cold metal of the device and he depressed the jewel at its center.

Daniel watched as the shield winked out of existence, leaving Sam lying on the dusty floor. He moved up by her head, pressing his fingers into her neck, searching for any sign of life. Finding a strong pulse, Daniel breathed a sigh of relief as he ran his eyes over her body, looking for any obvious sign of an injury. All he could see was a liberal layer of dirt and debris and what appeared to be flash burns on the backs of her hands.

"She's alive." Daniel felt the relief wash over him in a palpable wave "Sam? Sam, come on, we need you to wake up so we can get outta here."

Silence met the archaeologists pleas. "How did she survive? It looks like half this room went up in the explosion and somehow that weapon went off. Shouldn't she be dead right now?"

"Ordinarily I would agree with you. But these are not ordinary circumstances."

A low groan drew their attention back down to the floor where Sam was beginning to stir. Opening her eyes slightly, she was relieved and surprised to see her team mates leaning over her.

"Sorry to disappoint. Next time I'll be sure to die like I should."

Her voice came out a bare whisper, but Daniel thought it was the most beautiful thing he'd ever heard.

"Sam. Thank God. What happened?" Daniel asked as he slid an arm under her head and shoulders and helped Sam to sit upright.

Her head spun crazily for a moment and Sam closed her eyes and sat, sucking in deep breaths for a moment.

Daniel's face creased in concern. "You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just give me a minute," Sam replied shakily. "So, I guess the whole room didn't go up when I hit the detonator?"

"It did not," Teal'c replied, "and you are quite lucky."

"I know. Thought for sure I was gonna… well, anyway. I sort of ran into some trouble. Two Jaffa walked in just as I was wiring the last of the charges. I hit the remote, detonated the C-4 by the door, tried to take 'em out. Got one of 'em in the initial blast, but the other one went for some sort of controller he had on his wrist."

"A controller for the weapon?"

"I wasn't sure, but it seemed like a good bet. I guess he figured he was dead anyway and wanted to be sure he'd take me out too."

"So, how did you…?" Daniel began, gesturing absently.

"I figured Ba'al wouldn't want something like that around without protection, so I activated the personal shield on the hand device I'd found. I knew something looked different about it. I just wasn't sure what. Guess now I know. Too bad those damn things don't work against falling rock," Sam finished, rubbing gingerly at the lump on the back of her head. She'd be lucky if she didn't end up at the mercy of Doctor Brightman again once this was all over.

"No kidding. But how…"

Teal'c interrupted hurriedly. "I believe we would be better served by continuing this conversation once we are safely back in the SGC. We must get out of here and detonate the remaining explosives."

Daniel looked around, as though he suddenly realized where they were. "Oh, right. Right." Reaching down, he gave Sam a hand up, steadying her.

Sam watched as the room spun for a few seconds before settling again. "I'm good to go, Daniel. Thanks."

Teal'c nodded, then reached up to key his radio. "Bravo leader to Alpha leader, come in." His call was met with nothing but static and Teal'c tried again, with no success.

"Maybe the explosion or the weapon knocked them out?" Sam surmised. "We'll have to proceed as if they've been compromised."

"Agreed. Do you still have the detonator?"

"Yeah, right here," Sam said, holding up the small apparatus as she slipped off the hand device and tucked it into her pocket.

Teal'c nodded then led the way into the corridor. They were no longer concerned with stealth or secrecy. The entire complex had to know they were there by now. Speed was now their primary mission. Moving swiftly down the hallways, Daniel stuck close by Sam, ready to lend her any support she might need on their way out.

The team reached the outside door and slowed their flight, coming to a halt just to one side of the portal. Teal'c gestured for them to conceal themselves along the wall as he pressed the sequence of buttons that opened the door. As the hatch slid open the sound of weapon's fire filled the air. Sam poked her head out just enough to get a look at what was happening outside.

Jaffa were running across the clearing in disarray as rounds from SGC weaponry seemed to come at them from several directions simultaneously. Some had taken what shelter they were able and were returning fire with zats and staff weapons, but it appeared as though they were outnumbered and outgunned.

"Come, we must take advantage of their confusion and reach the trees," Teal'c ordered, leaving the safety of the doorway and heading for the tree line at a dead run, Sam and Daniel close behind.

They were over halfway across the clearing before they were noticed and staff weapon fire crackled the air near them. Sam slowed her flight, whirling to return fire. Seeing two Jaffa turning on them, Sam smoothly squeezed the trigger, taking the nearest of them down with one well placed shot.

With her attention on his comrade, the second Jaffa had enough time to take careful aim on Sam. Just as she was bringing her weapon to bear on her enemy a sharp report echoed through the air and he jerked violently as a fired round struck him on the side of the head, sending him sprawling into the dust. He was dead before he hit the ground.

Sam immediately searched the tree line, looking for her savior. Spotting a figure, almost motionless standing behind a tree at the edge of the forest, Sam recognized Gunnery Sergeant Walker. Making eye contact with him, she gave him a brief nod of thanks before setting off again, hustling to catch up with Daniel and Teal'c.

Gunny Walker had seen SG-1 exit the temple and make a break for the tree line. As a member of SG-3, he was used to hot extractions from hostile planets, skills he honed as an elite Marine sniper. Walker calmed his breathing and efficiently pulled the trigger, dispatching the target he had in his sights.

Out of the corner of his eye, the Gunny spotted two Jaffa breaking away from the SG troops in front of them and turning to fire on SG-1. As he moved to swivel his rifle toward them, he could see Colonel Carter slow her flight and return fire. Fear lanced through him as he realized he wouldn't be able to take out both targets before one of them would be able to fire on the Colonel.

Gunny Walker had seen a number of selfless acts during his service both to the Marine Corps and the SGC. Watching Colonel Carter stand tall in that clearing, laying down covering fire for her team mates, had to be one of the most profoundly brave. He watched as the Colonel took down one of the Jaffa only moments before he too squeezed the trigger, skillfully taking out the other.

Raising his eyes from his scope, he met the Colonel's eyes, gave her a subtle nod before she broke into a jog toward the tree line where the other members of her team awaited her. He knew there was a reason he had remained with the SGC once his one year tour was up. No where else could he find such a group of people as were a part of the SGC; one of whom just disappeared into the trees.

Sam's breath came short in her chest as she ran through the trees. They had set off on a straight line out of the temple, but were now circling back around looking to link up with the team that had come in after them. Their radios were still non-functional and they were going to have to rely on face to face communication.

Teal'c remained in the lead, his powerful legs churning up the distance and Sam felt the fatigue of the last hour beginning to pull at her strength. Determined not to fall behind, she redoubled her efforts but was pathetically grateful when Teal'c's arm shot up, his fist closed as he called for a halt.

Gesturing toward his eyes and then off to their left, Teal'c indicated he had seen something and was unsure if what he had seen was friend or foe. Sam nodded once, then moved to take up a position a bit apart from him, motioning Daniel to do the same. Leveling her weapon in the direction of the movement Teal'c had seen, Sam nodded to him once, indicating her readiness.

He didn't like announcing their position, but without another means of communication, they had precious few options. They needed to make contact with the SG team and order all personnel out and away from the temple before they set off the charges. They couldn't risk any friendlies getting caught up in the explosion.

Teal'c's baritone voice echoed slightly under the canopy of trees, "Wizard!" he shouted, using the challenge phrase they had agreed upon. They all tensed, waiting for the reply. If the answer was correct, they'd know they had found the SG team. If not, they would open fire.

Lieutenant Kent's voice came back loud and clear. "Oz!"

Sam heaved a sigh of relief and allowed the barrel of her weapon to drop. _Thank God. Kent and Garrett must've made it and linked up with Charlie team._ Standing on shaking legs she could feel the nervous sweat dripping down her face, stinging her eyes, but didn't move to wipe it off. Daniel came to stand beside her.

Raising an eyebrow at her, Daniel's concern shone from his face. Sam simply nodded then turned to watch the SG team materialize in front of them.

Teal'c approached Colonel Reynolds, shouldering his staff weapon. "Colonel, the charges are set, call for a retreat."

Reynolds wasted no time in keying his microphone and issuing the order. "Disengage. All personnel. Disengage. Fall back to rally point. Thirty seconds. Alpha team, prepare for defense of the 'gate. Dial it up in three minutes."

Acknowledgements rang out from the team as they scrambled to follow the Colonel's orders. Reynolds turned back toward the complex and watched as his team broke off their attack and made their retreat back toward their pre-arranged meeting point. Flipping open the cover on his watch, he followed suit, SG-1 right with him as they dodged through the trees.

Reaching the rally point, Reynolds set up a defensive perimeter to meet the Jaffa pursuit right behind them and then ordered a quick headcount.

"Bravo team all present and accounted for."

"Charlie team all present and accounted for."

Reynolds allowed himself a brief moment of relief before meeting Teal'c's eyes. Teal'c then turned to Sam as she pulled the detonator from her pocket and armed it. He had decided at the outset that she would be the one who was to push the button that destroyed the complex. He would give her that honor.

"Fire in the hole! Fire in the hole!"

Every SG team member tensed in expectation as Sam pressed the button. There was a tiny delay before a rumble of the explosion could be heard rustling through the trees. Ducking down instinctively as the sound rolled over them, the team kept their eyes trained on the trees. Waiting for the Jaffa counter attack. Expecting it.

When answering fire from Jaffa staff weapons wasn't immediately heard, Reynolds decided not to wait for it. They'd be better off with the whole team together and the only way to make that happen was to get back to the 'gate and link up with the Alpha team.

"Move out! Fall back to the 'gate! Bravo team in the lead, Charlie team's got our six. Move it people!"

It was all the incentive they needed. In a flash of green fatigues and Kevlar helmets, Charlie team broke out into flanking positions as Teal'c, Sam and Daniel headed off in the direction of the Stargate. They knew a pursuit would be coming, it was only a matter of when.

Zig zagging through the dense underbrush, they ran as fast as the terrain would allow. Sam knew they weren't far from the 'gate, but the distance seemed impossibly far as her stamina began to give way. She had known this mission would be difficult, on more than one level, and now she was beginning to wonder if she didn't push herself too hard the last two weeks in an attempt to prepare.

Her lungs burning with the exertion, Sam's pace began to slow, simply not able to keep up with Teal'c's long legged running style. She wouldn't stop, but her body betrayed her and Sam realized she was on the verge of collapse when she felt a strong, warm hand around her waist, pushing her gently but firmly.

"Come on, Sam. Almost there."

Daniel's encouragement and support were like a welcome rain on a hot day and Sam put all of her will and determination into running. They were close now, and just as the team broke through the trees a shrieking whine filled the air overhead. Teal'c spun, his staff weapon up and ready as a death glider passed above them, raining down hideous fire on the troops holding the 'gate open.

Colonel Reynolds didn't hesitate. They had known there were death gliders on the planet and had prepared for the eventuality that they would have to face off against them. But now that their mission had been accomplished, he didn't want to chance having to take one on.

Shouting at the top of his lungs, Reynolds gave the orders that would abandon the planet and finish off this mission.

"Alpha and Bravo teams, through the 'gate! Charlie team, suppressing fire! Give 'em some cover!"

Alpha team began to break from their formation, one by one leaping through the shimmering event horizon on their way back to the SGC, safe and relatively sound. Their wounded had been sent through as soon as they had heard the order to abandon the complex and now the others quickly and efficiently followed suit as superheated blasts from the death glider's cannons carved out sections of the ground at their feet.

Teal'c gained the stone steps leading up to the 'gate and then pivoted around and returned the glider's fire. Sam and Daniel reached the steps only a moment behind him. The archaeologist pushed Sam toward the event horizon as he too raised his weapon and began to fire.

"Get through, Sam! We're right behind you!"

Shaking off his hand, Sam pulled up her P-90 and squeezed off several bursts. If the guys weren't leaving just yet, then neither was she.

"All clear!" Teal'c shouted. "Colonel Reynolds, fall back!"

Blasts exploded to his left as Reynolds looked over his shoulder at SG-1 holding the 'gate. He should've known better than to think they would leave without the rest of the team.

"Fall back, fall back! Two by two!"

Displacing from their positions in an efficiently choreographed dance, the members of Charlie team paired off, each giving the other cover as they fell back toward the 'gate. There was no panic, no mad rush for the safety of the wormhole, only an organized maneuver that ensured no one would be inadvertently left behind.

As the first members of Charlie team reached the steps leading up to the 'gate, Daniel left his position, firing right up until the point when he could feel the electric pull of the event horizon at his back. Reaching out, he grabbed Sam's arm and pulled her with him. The fact that he was able to almost effortlessly yank her out of her position and turn into the event horizon spoke of her fatigue. Daniel knew she'd be upset at him, but he'd rather that than she push herself any further. The rest of the team and Teal'c were right with them, there was no reason to remain any longer.

Sam only had an instant to process that Daniel had ahold of her arm and was dragging her into the wormhole before she was swallowed up in its frigid grasp, carried along at dizzying speeds and then dumped unceremoniously on the metal ramp of the SGC 'gateroom. Daniel's grip on her arm tightened as the room spun dizzily and Sam leaned forward, her P-90 dangling from its harness, her hands on her knees.

Daniel stood, one hand on Sam's arm, his other arm draped around her waist. She straightened slowly, looking up and giving Daniel a slight smile.

"I'm okay. Thanks. And if you ever do that again, you're going to find out first hand what they teach women in Level Three advanced hand to hand."

Daniel swallowed hard at the implication. "If that means your alive and well at the end of it, I can live with that."

Sam's smile widened and she laid a hand over Daniel's, patting it lightly before turning toward the control room windows. Catching Jack's eye, Sam nodded once, the silent exchange taking only a brief moment, but conveying a great deal. _Mission accomplished. I'm okay. Don't worry. I love you._

Jack had been in the control room when the 'gate had been activated. The word had come through that the team was pulling back, but that they were under fire and would be coming in hot. He hadn't thought it possible to feel even more impotent than he had after Reynolds' last transmission, but as he paced the control room and realized he could do little but stand by and wait, O'Neill realized he was wrong. Nervous anxiety gathered in his belly causing his hands to twitch and he shoved them deep into his pockets to cover the tremors.

They'd received little intel from anyone on -035. Just that Colonel Reynolds had called for an all out retreat. That order could have meant almost anything, from total success to total failure of their mission. Jack could only stand by and wait for Reynolds or one of his team leaders to come through and report. He was dimly aware of Sergeant Harriman putting out the call for a medical team to report to the 'gateroom. Just the words 'medical team' sent a current of dread running through him.

Tense silence filled the room as the support personnel waited for the team to begin emerging from the wormhole. The medical team arrived in the 'gateroom and stood just inside the double doors, close in the even that they were needed yet at the same time out of the way. Doctor Brightman had accompanied the team personally, having been briefed on the mission and the likelihood that her trauma team would be needed.

As the first team members had come staggering through the 'gate, the medical team had gone into action, quickly ascertaining their conditions and then competently moving them to the infirmary. There had been a lull of several minutes after the first two men had come through, during which the entire SGC seemed to hold its collective breath.

Jack had immediately recognized the first two men through the 'gate as the Lieutenants who had been injured in the first wave. The audio channel had been left open and he could hear the shouted orders and weapon's fire clearly over the speakers. Clenching his jaw in frustration, O'Neill willed them to move faster. He could hear the distinctive whine of death glider engines and knew they were out of time. They needed to get the rest of the team through the 'gate in the next couple of minutes if they were going to avoid a prolonged battle with Ba'al's Jaffa.

Jack watched the clock tick away the first minute, then a second before the remaining members of the strike team began arriving on the ramp. He kept careful count as they exited, morbidly waiting for Reynolds to come through and announce that everyone who would make it back was present and accounted for.

The members of Reynolds' Alpha team exited the 'gate looking tired but triumphant and Jack prayed the look indicated their mission had been a success. There was another pause in the shimmering of the event horizon before the next figures exited, stumbling onto the ramp and coming to a halt halfway down the sloping metal.

Jack breathed an audible sigh of relief when he saw Sam, looking battered and exhausted but very much alive, falter then slump forward to rest her hands on her knees, her shoulders heaving. Daniel was supporting her, liberally covered in dirt and grit, but seemingly unharmed. No longer able to simply stand by in the control room, Jack was about to turn and head for the stairs when Sam sharp gaze brought him up short.

In that one look, he saw everything he needed to know. They'd done it. They were safe. Jack nodded in return, then pulled his hands free of his pockets and headed for the 'gateroom, determined to see the rest of the team face to face.

By the time he reached the 'gate room, the members of the Marine assault team were coming through until finally all that was left on the planet was Teal'c and Colonel Reynolds. Knowing both men well, Jack wondered if they weren't each on the other side waiting to be the last one through. Sam and Daniel were standing to one side of the ramp, each with their eyes locked on the event horizon waiting for the last two members of the team to make their appearance.

A stray bolt from a staff weapon blasted through the wormhole and into the far wall of the 'gateroom, sending the team sprawling for cover. As they raised their heads the event horizon shimmered and Colonel Reynolds and Teal'c exited side by side.

"Close the iris!" Jack bellowed, knowing that the Jaffa would continue to fire into the wormhole as long as it remained open. "Shut down the 'gate!" The metal plates of the trinium reinforced defensive iris slid into place with a metallic grinding that O'Neill found to be the most comforting sound he'd heard in a while.

Jack made his way to where he'd seen Sam and Daniel hit the deck, unsurprised to find Doctor Brightman already examining her recent patient. Jack bent low, looking to reassure himself that Sam was indeed alive and well.

"Carter? You doin' okay?"

Sam's eyes jerked away from the penlight currently boring holes in her skull to meet the General's worried gaze.

"Fine, Sir."

"Let me be the judge of that, Colonel," Doctor Brightman responded firmly. "Those burns are going to need some treatment. Anything else I need to know about?"

Sam opened her mouth to protest, but Daniel cut her off. "She got caught in the initial blast. She's probably got a lump on that hard head of hers somewhere. When we found her she was unconscious. Probably had been for at least five minutes."

Sam was indignant. The last thing she wanted was to make it all the way through the mission only to be carried out of the 'gateroom. She was going to go to her post mission physical under her own steam and then attend the debriefing if it killed her.

"Hey now, I said I'm fine."

"Yes well, we'll see after we get you through your physical. Airman, get a gurney for Colonel Carter," Doctor Brightman ordered.

"No, no, really. I don't need it. I'm fine to walk," Sam said defiantly, and to prove the point shook off Daniel's hand and pushed herself unevenly to her feet.

Jack had seen her stubborn streak on too many occasions and knew better after eight years to fight it. Instead, he took up a position beside Sam as the color drained from her face and a light sheen of sweat broke out across her brow. He knew what it was costing her to stand on her own two feet, and he also knew he didn't want her crashing back down again if it was preventable.

"Alright, Colonel. No gurney, but you're going to stay in the infirmary until the Doc says you're good to go, agreed?"

Sam briefly considered arguing the point, but finally decided she was simply too exhausted. "Understood, Sir."

Jack nodded and turned his attention to Colonel Reynolds as the Marine walked down the ramp and stood before him.

"Colonel, report."

"Mission accomplished. All members of Strike Force Galaxy present and accounted for, Sir." A slow smile broke out over the Colonel's face as he delivered his abbreviated mission report.

"Well done, Colonel. All of you. Get yourselves down to the infirmary and then cleaned up. We'll debrief at 1500 hours."

"Aye, Sir. Strike Force Galaxy, dismissed."

Sam knew it would be too much to ask that Jack stay behind while she submitted to the Doctor's tender mercies and so instead unclipped her P-90, handing it off to the Weapon's Sergeant as she exited the 'gateroom. Her legs still felt decidedly unsteady, but there was no way on this planet or any other that she was going to enter the infirmary any way but under her own steam.

Jack remained at her side as Sam and the rest of the team headed for Level 19. He knew there were probably things he needed to be doing in his office or the control room, but just this once he was going to be where he wanted to be, not where he should be. He kept a surreptitious eye on Sam. Despite her protests that she was 'fine', he'd seen the hesitation in her movements and the tiny wrinkles that gathered around her eyes. All telltale signs to someone who'd studied Sam as long as he had that she was in pain.

Daniel and Teal'c weren't far behind as they pushed through the double doors into the infirmary and were steered toward the far corner where the medical team had set up several beds in preparation for them. Jack noted the unusually large staff and amount of equipment nearby and could only thank whatever Gods were looking out for them that they hadn't needed any of it on this mission.

Sam knew she was just about at the end of her endurance, the short walk from the 'gateroom to the infirmary sapping her strength more than she would have thought. She stopped off at the first offered bed and for a moment wondered just how she was going to climb up into it when Jack was at her side, offering her his arm.

"I know you're 'fine' and all, but you look like crap. So how about you let me help you up in the bed before you fall down, huh?"

Sam offered him a wan smile. "Yessir, General."

Jack was shocked at the ease with which Sam gave in to his request and was immediately concerned that she was hurting even more than he realized. Sam unzipped her vest and jacket, handing them both off to the waiting orderly before accepting Jack's assistance and felt herself neatly lifted off her feet and set down gently on top of the scratchy OD green blankets.

Now that she was actually sitting down, the room began a nauseating spin and her vision began to tunnel slightly.

Jack saw Sam's already pale face whiten further and she swayed unsteadily. "Carter?"

"Just a bit dizzy. It'll pass."

"Uh huh. Airman, get Doc Brightman over here," Jack instructed as he moved to support Sam before she pitched off the side of the bed. "Come on, lie down here. Can't have you taking a header off the bed now can we?"

O'Neill tried to sound flip, but Sam's rapid breathing and coloring had him worried that perhaps she'd hit her head harder than Daniel realized. Helping her to ease over onto her back, Jack stepped out of the way as the Doctor approached the bedside.

"I was hoping not to see you back in here so soon, Colonel," she said lightly, pulling her stethoscope from around her neck and putting it to use.

"Wasn't planned, Doc," Sam said, her speech slurring a bit as she allowed her eyes to slide closed, hoping it would slow the spinning of the room.

"Colonel, can you open your eyes for me?"

Sam didn't have the strength to reply. She knew the Doctor was examining her, asking her questions. She couldn't seem to focus her attention on what was happening. The voices and sounds around her echoed eerily, Jack's among them. But try as she might she simply couldn't force her eyes open.

Her last coherent thought before she lost consciousness was how wonderful it was to hear his voice.


	22. Chapter Twenty Two

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

Teal'c, Daniel and Jack had spent the last thirty minutes pacing and worrying in the waiting area just outside the infirmary. Jack squirmed for the umpteenth time, trying to get comfortable in the hard plastic chair.

"Remind me to requisition some better chairs for down here. My ass wasn't meant for this damned thing. Christ, if I never spend another minute in these chairs again it'll be too goddamned soon," Jack groused loudly, his apprehension getting the better of him.

Teal'c remained silent, his gaze rarely straying from the infirmary doors. He chose to stand just to one side of the entryway where he could see through the narrow windows. He had done the best he was able, and still it felt as though he had come up short. He had vowed to bring his team home alive; somehow bringing them home alive but injured still felt like a failure.

"She was in the room when they set that weapon off? How the hell does that work? Why isn't she…?" Jack trailed off, unwilling to complete the thought.

"I don't know, Jack," Daniel said softly, pulling the hand device he'd taken from Sam's gear out of his pocket. "She had this on and the personal shield activated. Apparently they were able to modify it to protect against the weapon. Probably meant for Ba'al to use himself."

"Speaking of, anyone see 'ol Bocce Ba'al himself?"

"Ah, no. Not that I know of. Doesn't mean he wasn't there somewhere, but I don't think so. Not his style to hang around a backwater planet like that one when there are people to intimidate."

"Yeah. Probably," Jack replied. He'd held out a small measure of hope that the bastard had actually been there and had been blown to hell along with his new toy. But then again, that'd deprive O'Neill of the pleasure of wiping that smug smile off Ba'al's face himself. Something he'd dreamed of more than once, in many bloody and brutal ways.

"And what was with the Jaffa setting that thing off while they were inside the room anyway? I didn't think they were really that stupid."

"Sam detonated some of the C-4. Those guys weren't going to make it back out of that room. She figured they wanted to be sure she didn't make it out either."

"So they set it off. I suppose that makes as much sense as anything else those boys do."

"Do you believe Colonel Carter's exposure to the weapon's energy wave has anything to do with her current condition, O'Neill?" Teal'c queried, his own thoughts running along those same lines.

"I don't know, you tell me. You're the Goa'uld weapon's expert," Jack retorted sarcastically, then immediately winced, regretting his tone, but didn't take back his words. He was too angry right now, mainly at himself, to give a kind word to anyone, even when it was deserved.

"You are correct, O'Neill. But I do not believe this weapon was of Goa'uld design. The controls were in Goa'uld, but it appeared as though they were installed later. The material they were installed on did not match the rest of the weapon's housing."

Daniel finally spoke up, unwilling to listen to Jack snipe at them any longer. "We won't know anything until Doctor Brightman finishes up with her, so why don't you come with me down to the commissary. I'll buy you a cup of bad coffee."

"Maybe later. I've had enough bad coffee today to last me a lifetime."

"Jack…" Daniel began, but was cut off when Teal'c held up his hand.

"Doctor Brightman is on her way."

Daniel and Jack both stood as the doors to the infirmary swung open and the Doctor stepped out, pulling surgical gloves from her hands. She took in the tense looks on the faces in front of her and wasted no time getting to the point.

"Colonel Carter has a moderate concussion and some first and second degree burns on the back of her hands and forearms. Cuts and bruises, most likely from flying debris from the explosion she was caught in.

"As for the effects of the energy weapon she was exposed to, right now I can't see any lingering effects, but I'd like to keep her in the infirmary for at least twenty-four hours to monitor her condition."

Daniel was the first to speak up. "Is she awake? Can we see her?"

"She's still unconscious and aside from the head injury, I don't see any medical reason for it. Right now I'm chalking it up to exhaustion, unless something else presents itself."

"So what're you going to do for her?"

"Well, we're giving her some IV fluids and allowing her to get some rest. I believe for now, its what's best for her."

Jack had been unusually quiet during the exchange and now stood, his hands shoved deep into his pockets, studying his boots. When he did speak it was in a subdued voice quite uncommon for the normally outspoken General. "Did we screw up by allowing her to go on this mission?"

Doctor Brightman pursed her lips as she considered the question. "At this point, I can't say for sure. But from what I was able to gather about her mental state, I'm not sure that keeping her from it would have been any better for her."

Jack looked up, nodded. "If it's okay, I'll go in for a while."

"Of course, Sir. If you'll excuse me, I have other patients I need to see."

Jack could've slapped himself. He'd nearly forgotten about the other two men who'd been wounded during the operation. "Yeah, how are they?"

"Lieutenants Parker and Ketchum both sustained third degree staff weapon burns. They'll need to be kept in the infirmary for treatment for a few days, but I expect them both to make a full recovery."

"Good, good. I'll expect your report later today, Doc."

"Yes, Sir," she replied before pushing back through the doors into the infirmary.

Daniel wasn't sure what surprised him more, that Jack was actually going to take some time to stay with Sam or that he'd been caught off guard by the action. He couldn't help commenting on it. "So, you're not going back to your office?"

"Daniel, save it for later. I'm sure I'll do something later to piss you off and you can give me crap for it then. Right now, I'm just not in the mood."

The younger man raised his arms in surrender. "Okay, okay. Sorry." They were all on edge, but Doctor Brightman hadn't seemed overly concerned and he could feel the tension beginning to ebb from his body. "Do you need anything?"

"Yeah, come spell me in a couple of hours. I still have to handle the debrief for Reynolds and the rest of the team. Teal'c should be able to handle that on his own. You can give this one a miss."

"I can do that," Daniel said, giving Jack a hopeful smile. "Don't worry about Sam. She'll probably outlive all of us."

Jack cracked a tiny smile. "One can only hope. Go on. Get a hot shower and something to eat."

Daniel departed, leaving Jack and Teal'c alone. Teal'c stood, almost rigidly, waiting for O'Neill's attention to turn on him.

"Something you wanted, T.?"

"I wish to express my regret at the condition of the team upon our return, O'Neill."

"What the hell're you talkin' about? Condition? For cryin' out loud, we were expecting fifteen percent casualties, you came back with none and only three injuries, none life threatening. What more do you want?"

"I had hoped to do better."

"T. you know better than most that we're not exactly in a business where everyone gets to come home safe and sound every night. I'm a bit surprised that you even thought you could on this one."

"Indeed. But as time has passed, I have felt more and more as though I've seen enough good warriors die under my command. I didn't want this to be another such occasion. For many reasons."

"You can't put that kind of pressure on yourself and survive it. I've seen good men try and it nearly destroyed them."

"Perhaps. But do you not feel the same, O'Neill?"

Jack scrubbed a hand up through his hair in a frustrated gesture. "Yeah, I do. But at the end of the day, I have to accept that things are never going to work out the way I want all the time. It's shitty, but there's not much I can do about it."

Teal'c inclined his head. He knew that he would have to accept his own limitations and that people under his command would die. Perhaps even people he considered friends. Maybe that's what made this so hard. As First Prime, he didn't have the luxury of friends. He would order men into combat and while he respected them, they were not family in the way the SGC and SG-1 had become. He acknowledged that one day he would need to find a way to deal with his dilemma. For today he simply needed to be satisfied with the fact that they all made it home alive.

"Forgive me, I should not have kept you from Colonel Carter."

Jack waved him off. "S'alright. Go on, get some chow and a hot shower. I'll see you at the debrief."

Teal'c clasped his hands behind his back and strode off down the hallway in a familiar manner that brought a small smile to Jack's face. Shaking his head, he walked through the medical ward and pulled up a chair next to Sam's bed. Sighing, Jack reached out and traced a finger along Sam's arm before pulling her hand into his.

"Ya know, we really need to stop meeting like this Carter. People really are gonna talk." Squinting against the uncomfortable emotion of being back in this position, sitting in a hospital ward waiting for Sam to awaken, Jack leaned back in his chair and propped up his feet and attempted to get comfortable. He had a feeling he was going to be here awhile.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Somewhere in the back of her mind, Sam was aware she was dreaming, but couldn't muster the energy to care. It was soft and warm where she was, surrounded by fluffy white clouds and a nearly overwhelming sense of security. Feeling more content than she had in years, Sam was willing to simply drift, weightless, through the dreamscape.

Time didn't seem to mean much in this place of serenity. She wasn't sure how long she'd been there, only that she didn't really much want to leave. Here there was peace and freedom from nightmares and pain. Here she was free from the problems and pressures of the waking world. Here she was safe.

She could hear voices every now and then. Voices that were as familiar as her own. Voices that spoke in calming tones words that she couldn't quite make out. The voices came and went, and in the silence that ensued she wasn't sure if they left or she simply couldn't hear them any longer.

But one seemed to call to her in a way different from the others, one soul to another. It was to that voice she was drawn inexorably. Gliding closer, the voice reached out and surrounded her, so close now that she could nearly make out the words. But it wasn't the words themselves that drew her in, but the emotion behind them. Emotion, raw and powerful, a palpable wave that passed over her ephemeral form and wrapped her in a heart stopping sensation of love that stole her breath and sent her heart pounding.

_Sam…_ The name was whispered on the wings of angels, reaching her ears as a caress. _C'mon, wake up for me. Open your eyes, Dorothy._

She wanted to do as the voice said. She wanted nothing more than to open her eyes and see his warm brown eyes. Those eyes, that had witnessed so much and yet in them she had seen such tenderness and devotion; she knew that in them she could glimpse her future. The want suddenly became an intense need that couldn't be ignored.

Putting all her will into the effort, Sam forced herself to embrace the waking world. Forced herself back toward the pain she knew awaited her, but she no longer cared. He was there, waiting for her, calling to her. She couldn't deny him.

Jack wasn't sure how long he'd been asleep, sitting up in the torturous infirmary chair, Sam's hand loosely grasped in his, careful not to disturb the analgesic cream coating her burns. He'd left her long enough to attend Colonel Reynolds' debriefing and clear out his inbox before returning. Daniel had dutifully kept his vigil, then wordlessly relinquished his seat hours later when Jack had been able to return.

The archaeologist had returned with Teal'c around the dinner hour, carrying a tray laden with food from the dining hall. Jack hadn't felt much like eating, but was willing to at least make an effort after the two had gone to the trouble of putting a plate together for him.

Sometime after midnight Jack had sent the two men off to their quarters for some well deserved sleep, promising he'd call if there was anything to report. He squinted down at his watch, the dim light making it difficult to make out, but he thought it was somewhere around 0445.

Cutting his eyes over at the woman in the bed next to him, Sam was resting peacefully, her face and body free from the tenseness that had characterized her sleep in the days after her return from -035. For that alone, he was grateful. At least she was able to get a few hours of undisturbed slumber.

Shifting in his chair and stretching his free hand over his head, Jack could feel the twinges running up and down his back and knew he should at least stretch out in the next bed, but couldn't bring himself to let go of Sam's hand. He couldn't believe how sentimental he'd become in his old age.

At that moment, he'd give everything had, everything he was, just to see Sam open her eyes. See her smile at him. Hear her say his name.

"Sam…. C'mon, wake up for me. Open your eyes, Dorothy." Squeezing her hand gently in his, Jack attempted to throw off the heaviness that had settled over him. _She needs the rest. Just give her some time already,_ he admonished himself.

The movement was so faint that at first he thought he'd imagined it. When Sam's grasp tightened ever so slightly, he knew it had been real.

"Hey there. C'mon Sam, open up those baby blues for me."

The first thing she was aware of was the pressure of a hand holding hers. Focusing on the sensation, Sam moved her fingers almost imperceptibly, the twitch sending an electric current of feeling up and down her arm. Then came the hot needles of pain, as though her arm had been asleep and was slowly awakening. She made a sound, somewhere between a sigh and a moan.

Jack was sure he'd never heard anything so beautiful. Sitting up and leaning closer, he watched her eyes flutter open, Sam's gaze wandering dazedly for a moment before settling on him.

"Hey. Nice of you to join us, Dorothy. I'm pretty sure you're back in Kansas again."

Sam's mouth quirked into a tiny smile, her gaze sharpened as she focused on the face hovering above hers. "Wow Scarecrow, thought I left you back in Oz," Sam murmured, her voice a rough whisper.

Jack's face creased into a smile at the endearment. "Never. I'm always gonna be right here."

Sam's brow furrowed in confusion as she attempted to put together what had happened and realized she honestly didn't remember much after coming through the 'gate. It was all a haze of pain and weariness.

Clearing her throat, Sam spoke again, stronger and sounding more like herself. "How long?"

"It's around 0500. You've been out of it for close to 18 hours."

"You were here. Talking to me. I heard you," Sam breathed, realizing her dream was only partly fantasy.

"You did? Really? Huh. Good thing I didn't say anything too mushy. Thought for sure you couldn't hear me," Jack replied sardonically, a wry smile twisting his mouth. "How ya feelin' now?"

The answer was swift and honest. "Like I got blown up. Feel like I could sleep for another 18."

"I'll bet. Head doin' okay?"

"Hmm. A bit sore. I'll live."

Jack's smile faded somewhat. "Yes, you will. Thank God." Leaning down he placed a feather light kiss on Sam's forehead before drawing back to focus on her face again. "Get some sleep. From what I hear, the mission was a total success. It's all over."

"Yeah, I think it is."

Jack nodded. "I know it is. Rest. I'll be back to see you later."

"You too, Jack."

"I will, I will. Just as soon as I pass along the good news to Danny and Teal'c."

"Good news?"

"Yeah, that Dorothy's back and there's no place like home."

To be continued….


	23. Chapter Twenty Three FIN!

See Chapter One for full disclaimer and author's notes.

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

1526 hours.

Sam watched the clock hanging on the wall opposite her bed forlornly. It felt as though time had become stuck in some sort of demented black hole from which it could not escape. Doctor Brightman had agreed to release her on convalescent leave for the next seven days, provided she spend the rest of the day in the infirmary and barring any complications from her latest adventure, she could head home at 1730 hours. Sam was already dressed in some casual jeans and a soft flannel shirt, ready for the trip up to the surface and freedom.

She'd spent the last three days hooked up to more monitors and equipment than she really felt was necessary, all to monitor for something that seemed as elusive as time itself. Sam knew that her exposure to Ba'al's new weapon was something with which they had no experience and that the precautions were warranted, but that did little to ease her dower mood.

The infirmary staff had allowed her a laptop, up until they found her awake at 0230 working on a project for Area 51. At that point the laptop had been confiscated and Sam had spent the last day and a half staring at the four walls, bored out of her mind, her only distractions the all too infrequent visits from Jack and SG-1.

1529 hours.

_Dear God! I'm never gonna get out of here…_ The doors nearest her bed eased open a fraction. _Thank God… Daniel's here to keep me company for a while._ Sam sat up straighter, crossing her legs to sit atop the woolen OD blankets, anticipating a cup of coffee or maybe some sweet treasure spirited past the nurses by the intrepid archaeologist. The figure that entered the room was nearly the last person she expected to see.

Gunnery Sergeant Walker stood just inside the infirmary doors, looking decidedly uncomfortable with his surroundings. Marines were notorious about steering well clear of the infirmary unless absolutely necessary; and that necessity usually involved a post mission physical or briefly visiting an injured teammate. The Marines could be counted on to spend no more time than required, as if the unfortunate luck that landed someone in the infirmary was something that could be caught by casual contact. He made eye contact with Sam and walked directly toward her bedside.

"Gunny."

"Colonel Carter."

"What brings you down here? Doc Brightman looking to turn you into a pin cushion again?"

The Gunny blanched slightly at the suggestion and cleared his throat. "I hope not, ma'am. Actually, I was looking for you."

"Yeah well, I'm working on an escape. Maybe you can get the rest of SG-3 together and break me outta here."

"Now that sounds like a worthwhile mission, ma'am. I just might have to see what we can pull off."

Sam smiled. "I'd appreciate anything you can do, Gunny."

Walker shifted his feet slightly, unsure how to proceed. He'd come in here with a specific goal in mind, and after a great deal of contemplation, still wasn't sure how to put what he was feeling into words. After a moment, he opted for a direct path.

"I wanted to let you know that what you did back on -035 was one of the most courageous things I've ever seen."

Sam was thunderstruck. "Gunny… I just did my job. What I've been trained to do."

"With all due respect, ma'am, you did a helluva lot more than just your job. You didn't have to go back there. Not after what happened. I don't know everything, but if even a little bit of the scuttlebutt is true, no one would'a blamed you for never going back to that place again. But you went back and faced something that would've had some good men running the other way."

"Gunny…I'm not sure what to say…" Sam trailed off. Overt complements like this were things that had always made her uncomfortable. So rarely could she see the need for them.

"I know you don't ma'am, that's what makes you such an outstanding officer. Just wanted you to know. And that I'd follow you to hell and back, any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Ma'am." Gunnery Sergeant Walker came to rigid attention, executed a picture perfect about face, and strode from the room, leaving a stunned Air Force officer to ponder what he had said.

SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1-SG1

Jack sat on Sam's couch, his feet propped up on her coffee table, listening with half an ear to Daniel and Teal'c debate the pros and cons of spending a late fall afternoon watching football. Daniel didn't seem to quite grasp the primal pleasure that Jack and Teal'c enjoyed when watching grown men bash each other up and down the playing field. Jack had been pleasantly surprised to discover Teal'c's hidden love of the game, and could frequently be found watching Bears' games with him over the last few Sundays, when their respective schedules allowed.

Jack could hear Sam open and close the refrigerator door and was surprised when after several moments she hadn't yet re-entered the family room. Sitting up a bit straighter, he craned his neck looking to see where she may have gone. The whisper of the sliding glass door drew his attention and he saw Sam slip out the door and onto her deck. She'd been more pensive over the last few days, but Jack had considered it a fair trade off for her freedom from the nightmares that had plagued her before that last mission. He even grudgingly admitted that the extra few days in the infirmary were well worth it if the return trip to -035 had given Sam the peace she had so desperately sought.

Jack watched her for several minutes before rising to join her. Easing the door open, he stepped out into the mild fall air, unusual for Colorado, but certainly welcome. The setting sun sent bolts of fire across the horizon, painting Sam in bold strokes that brought out auburn highlights in her hair. The sight took his breath away and he wondered if he would ever grow tired of looking at her like this. His Golden Warrior.

"You just gonna stand there staring?"

Jack was caught flat footed and for once didn't have a witty response. "Yeah, guess I am."

Sam turned to regard him, a wry smile pulling at her lips. "Well, if that's the case, why don't you come stand over here?"

Jack chuckled, then complied, coming to stand directly in front of her, his hands resting easily on her waist. Sam sank into the embrace, her head leaning against his chest, his heartbeat a melody to soothe her. She sighed deeply and closed her eyes, winding her arms around Jack's back and squeezing lightly.

Jack couldn't help but remember the night, now almost four months ago, when he'd sat next to her on this very deck and listened as she told him of her broken engagement. That night's revelations opened him to possibilities he'd thought were long since lost, and he blew out an amazed breath at just how much things had changed in such a short time.

Sam could feel the tension radiating through Jack's chest as he exhaled. "What was that for?"

"Hmm?"

"You sighed. Just now. What was that all about?"

"Ah. Just thinking about the last time I was out on this deck with you."

Sam pulled back to look at him, a quizzical expression on her face. "And that makes you sigh?"

"Well, not the sitting on the deck exactly, no. Just thinking about how much has happened since then."

"Oh…. yeah I guess a lot has happened, hasn't it? So, any regrets?" Sam asked hesitantly. Jack was right, a great deal had happened, to the both of them. The consequences of which they would most likely feel for the rest of their lives. She couldn't help but wonder if the changes were ones Jack felt as though he couldn't live with.

Jack's answer was immediate. "Hell no."

"You don't regret anything?"

Jack met Sam's gaze and softened his expression before he reached up and ran a feather light touch through her hair. Sam leaned into the contact, eyes half lidded.

"Sam, anything that ends with the two of us standing together, no matter how we get there, is more than good enough for me."

"Okay," Sam said softly. She hated the doubt that clouded her emotions, but she couldn't seem to help how she felt.

"What about you?"

Sam hesitated. Was there anything she regretted? Certainly there were things that had happened that would mark her forever, but regret wasn't something that she equated with the experiences. She was alive. Yes, she had been wounded by what had happened, physically and emotionally; but those wounds had already begun to heal. SG-1 was intact after two rather harrowing missions. She was standing on her deck in the arms of the man she thought she'd never be able to get this close to, considering everything that stood in their way. The bad and the good, the dark and the light. It all had combined to become who she was today. She wouldn't give up any of it.

"No. No regrets."

Jack's eyebrows rose in surprise. "Really?"

"Really. I don't regret anything. Wish I'd brought SG-3 along for the ride the first time to -035, but no. No regrets. It's changed me. I'm not quite sure yet all the ways I've changed. But I think I'm stronger than I was before that night. And I know I'm happier, right now, than I've ever been."

Jack's arms closed around Sam's shoulders and drew her closer again. "Good enough for me," he said softly. "So….happy huh?"

"Without a doubt."

"Oh yeah? How happy?" Jack queried, humor in his tone.

Sam laughed lightly. "Deliriously. Exceedingly. Exceptionally. Fantastically. Incredibly. Ridiculously. Do I need to go on?"

Jack laughed aloud. "No. No need. But I have to tell ya, I'm more than a little bit worried that all of those came out in alphabetical order."

"Yeah well, no more worried than I am that you noticed that little detail." Sam pulled back, pouring every ounce of her love and respect for the man in her arms into her expression. "I love you, Jack."

He leaned closer, kissed her lightly on the forehead. Then each cheek, before allowing their lips to touch in an explosion of emotion that left them both reeling.

"I love you. Always." Jack had said the words before, countless times, but never soul to soul. Never on a level that left him exhilarated and quaking all at the same time. Never before had he bought into the notion of 'soul mates', until now.

"Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"I think we should probably go back inside soon."

"Why's that?"

"Well, it's either that, or I get you the bottle of cleaner and some towels. I think Daniel's gonna leave a permanent impression on my living room windows."

"Oh for cryin' out loud."

FIN!

Concluding author's notes:

A story this size seemed to deserve some sort of closure from me – please feel free to bail out now. )

Firstly, thanks to my husband and live-in beta reader, Robert, who knows way more than I do about pretty much everything. And to my son, Jack, who put up with Mommy's moods when she was writing and was ready with a hug when I most needed it.

Secondly, thanks to everyone who read and gave me feedback along the way. You're all very kind to take the time out to write and I very much appreciate it.

Some trivia about the story and the Air Force in general:

I am a United States Air Force veteran – 1991 to 1995 stationed at Dover AFB Delaware, where I served as a C-5 Galaxy Crew Chief during my time in service. The tail number of the air craft I was assigned was 870035, usually shortened to 7035 when talking over the radio – so the designation of the planet where Sam was captured: P7X-035.

Female officers in the Air Force are never refered to as "Sir", always "Ma'am". I know on screen we've seen characters refer to Sam as "Sir", but that's technically wrong. Only the Navy calls its women "Sir". Just a little pet peeve of mine. :-)

The Code of Conduct was a document that I was required to memorize and was expected tobe able to recite whenever askedduring Basic Training. The article that always stuck in my mind, and that I tried to carry with me throughout my years in service, is the first: _I am an American, fighting in the forces which guard our contry and our way of life. I am prepared to give my life in their defense._ I'd like to think that I still would, even though my time on active duty is now nearly a full 10 years behind me.

When I set out to write "Code of Honor", I began by writing a story that I really wanted to read. But strangely enough, I didn't even start to write at the beginning but rather the first thing that came to me was the scene where Sam orders Daniel and Teal'c to return to the SGC while she remains behind to cover their escape. In fact, the very first line that I wrote was a snippet Sam's dialogue from that scene – "Daniel, for once in your life, just follow orders!" The rest of this novel sprung from that one little line. I never could have guessed when I first put that quote down on paper almost 1 year ago to the day, where it would lead.

Thanks for taking the ride with me! I hope you had as much fun as I did.

Jen Gafeller

7/8/2005


End file.
